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What This Acclaimed Sex Therapist Wants You to Know

This Tantric Life with Layla Martin

Release Date: 01/04/2026

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More Episodes

Shownotes 

  • Take your business to the next level with my FREE VITA Coaching Checklist

  • Ian’s definition of great sex and how you can bring it into practice

  • Why basic chemical attraction is part of what keeps couples together

  • How dating apps impact relational and sexual experiences

  • The number one key to Ian and his wife’s sex life after 25 years together

  • A daily practice for men and one for women to enhance presence and pleasure

Bio

Ian Kerner, PhD, LMFT is a licensed psychotherapist and nationally recognized sex therapist who works with individuals and couples on a range of relational issues that often lead to distress. 

 

He’s regularly featured as an expert in various media, such as The Atlantic, The New York Times, The Economist, and NPR, as well as contributes regularly on the topic of relationships for CNN. 

 

Ian lectures frequently, with recent presentations for the Psychotherapy Networker Symposium, the Ackerman Institute, Tony Robbins, Goop, and TED 2021, and is the New York Times bestselling author of She Comes First and the recently published So Tell Me About the Last Time You Had Sex. 

 

In addition to being a Clinical Fellow of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists (AAMFT), Ian is certified by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists and is also a member of the American Family Therapy Academy (AFTA). 

 

He’s the co-founder and co-director of the Sex Therapy Program at the Institute for Contemporary Psychotherapy, one of the oldest and most respected not-for-profit mental health training and treatment facilities in New York City.

 

You can learn more about Ian’s work on his website.

Follow Layla!

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🎶 Listen on Spotify

💋 MOOD Sexy Plant Activated Supplements

🔥 For Men: Men’s Sexual Mastery

🌹 Obliss: The Sexual Masterclass for Women

 

Timestamps

00:00:46 - Guest introduction
00:02:36 - Take your business to the next level with my FREE VITA Coaching Checklist: FREE VITA Coaching Checklist 

00:05:21 - Ian shares how his personal experience inspired him bring his work to the world

00:10:28 - The science behind how pleasure is created in the vagina through intercourse

00:15:53 - How sensual touch above the waist and communication impact sex and pleasure

00:16:59 - How to get a woman’s desire going and enhance it throughout sex

00:24:25 - Ian shares his definition of great sex

00:31:18 - Layla explains what a recap after a sexual experience is and how it helps

00:33:00 - Ian and Layla drink MOOD SEX MAGIC

00:37:17 - How basic chemical attraction is part of what keeps couples together

00:39:45 - Can you create sexual desire if it was never there in the first place?

00:43:39 - Chemistry comes in all different forms

00:47:33 - Why porn is easier than partnered sex

00:55:54 - Ian shares what he sees as the biggest contributors to sexual issues

01:00:11 - How dating apps impact relational and sexual experiences

01:06:37 - The role willingness plays when it comes to sex in a long-term partnership

01:09:55 - The 3 different ways sex gets started

01:13:10 - The big key to Ian and his wife’s sex life after 25 years together

01:13:56 - Conclusion