Ep 15 – Breaking the Chain: From Addiction to Spiritual Freedom with James Dear

James Dear is a recovering drug addict. He was severely addicted but has been sober for over 5 years. In 2018, he started a movement called ‘Break The Chain’ to raise awareness and provide information about addiction and mental health after tragically losing a close friend to suicide. He took his advocacy to the next level by training as a counsellor and now works in a residential drug and alcohol treatment centre.  

In this episode, James talks about his personal experience with addiction and how practising meditation, yoga, and spirituality ‘broke the chain’ for him…

In this episode, we discuss:

•  James's tendency from a young age to gravitate towards instant gratification.
• His struggle with loneliness, being bullied at school and enjoying the protection, security, and safety of an antisocial group at secondary school (despite it being quite hellish!)
• Around 17, his friends got into class A drugs, and while terrified that he’d die if he used, he was more scared of being alone.
• Getting into drugs and the underground rave scene.
• Not planning on becoming a ‘drug dealer’, but developing a tolerance to drugs, and unable to afford it, he started to sell.
• Waking up in a police cell after crashing his car and the shame of losing his licence and getting caught with ketamine, cocaine, and MDMA.
• His addiction to ketamine and self-medicating to deal with life’s difficulties.
• Despite knowing he had to sort out his own life after a friend’s suicide, he drank stupid amounts of alcohol and experienced unbearable cravings. Unable to feel any happiness (anhedonia), and falling back into full-blown addiction before things got really dark.
• Recognising that changing geographical locations doesn’t work because the problem was his mind, and he took it with him.
• Becoming the most unhappy, anxious, and desperate he’d ever been and binge eating.
• Reflecting on what's missing in our culture, e.g., rituals for moving from boyhood to manhood, girlhood to womanhood, and young people taking on responsibilities—being part of a family unit compared to our culture.
• The dangers of placing individual happiness above everything else and how society tells us if we buy this, we’ll be happy.
•  How being stuck in the echo chamber of self-centredness is at the root of addiction and mental health problems because it’s so disconnecting.
• Believing the heart and soul of recovery from addiction is relationship.
• The impact of attending a meditation retreat even though spirituality wasn’t on his radar.
• Yoga and noticing the connection between his body and mind and stress.
• The impact of yoga philosophy: temporary things cannot satisfy us; we are not our bodies or our minds; we’re the driver of those things.
• The experience of trying to squeeze happiness out of material things and becoming empty.
•  The practice of stepping back and watching the mind on a rampage—full of desires, cravings, and emotions.
• Bringing these practices into his life because he was desperate!
• Becoming convinced that drugs and alcohol can never, ever possibly deliver real happiness, although they can provide sensory, temporary relief.
• If he’d been told immersing yourself completely, single-pointedly, spiritual mantras or spiritual sound vibrations make you less attracted to material things, and you can experience this eternality, peace and happiness— he’d be like, “Okay, that's mental, whatever!”.
• Flip-flopping between drinking and drugs and noticing he’d get super anxious, start self-doubting and thinking negatively.
• How doing Karma yoga, practising kindness, and giving without expectation put a massive smile on his face and changed his life.
• How things he practised as a counsellor and drug and alcohol clinician (like CBT) align with the connection between the body and the mind, the physiology affecting the mind.
• Our mutual challenges with religion!
• Recognising there is happiness higher than substances, sex, porn, shopping—or whatever you engage in that's compulsive and wish you didn't—and that relationships are key.

Connect with James:

Break The Chain Website

Break The Chain Instagram

Meditation New Zealand

Connect with Kerene:

Website – Mindful at Work

LinkedIn - Kerene Strochnetter

Instagram – Kerene_strochnetter

Facebook – Mindful at Work