No Contact Challenge Day 5: The Relationship Identity Crisis - Rediscovering Who You Really Are Ep. 153
Release Date: 12/03/2025
Will My Ex Come Back? The Truth About Getting Back Together Ep. 164
Breakup to Blessing
One of the most common questions after a breakup is: Will my ex change come back? In this episode, I unpack why that question keeps you stuck — and what actually needs to happen if there’s ever going to be a different outcome, whether that’s with your ex or someone new. I talk about: Why hoping your ex will “realise they made a mistake” often keeps you emotionally trapped The difference between breakups that involve impulsivity and those where someone has already emotionally checked out Why getting back together sometimes works — and why it usually doesn’t What really has to...
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Rebuilding Self-Worth After a Breakup (When It’s Always Come From Others) Ep. 163
Breakup to Blessing
After a breakup, it’s common to hear advice telling you to “reconnect with yourself” and “build your self-worth.” But knowing what to do and knowing how to do it — or whether it’s actually helping — are very different things. In this episode, I explore why so many people feel stuck after a breakup, even when they’re doing everything they’re told should help. We look at what happens when self-worth has historically come from external validation, why breakups can feel like a loss of identity, and how the nervous system seeks reassurance when emotional safety is suddenly...
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Starting Over Doesn’t Mean You've Failed Ep. 162
Breakup to Blessing
Starting over can feel like failure — especially after a breakup, divorce, or major life change. We tell ourselves we’ve wasted time, that we’re behind, or that we should have tried harder to make it work. In this episode, I’m reframing the idea of starting over and exploring why it feels so heavy — and how it can actually become one of the most liberating and clarifying seasons of your life. We talk about the sunk cost fallacy, why staying just because you’ve already invested so much keeps people stuck, and how the meaning you attach to “starting again” shapes your future far...
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"Finding Yourself" again after Heartbreak Ep. 161
Breakup to Blessing
After a breakup, everyone tells you to "find yourself" — but what does that actually mean? And more importantly, is it even the right question to ask? In this episode, I'm breaking down why the whole concept of "finding yourself" after a relationship ends might be setting you up for frustration, and what you should focus on instead. In this episode, we cover: Why "finding yourself" is the wrong framework (and what to ask instead) The neuroscience of heartbreak — why breakups feel like physical pain and why separation is so difficult How relationships create neural coupling and nervous...
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How to Set Goals After a Breakup: 9 Steps to Transform Your Life in 2026 Ep. 160
Breakup to Blessing
Starting the new year without your ex? Feeling that mix of hope and loneliness as you try to move forward? In this episode, I'm giving you the exact framework I wish I had during my first New Year after a breakup. This isn't about setting vague intentions that fizzle out by February. This is about creating real, sustainable change in your life using a proven 9-step goal attainment framework designed specifically for breakup recovery. In This Episode, You'll Learn: The 9 Steps to Transform Your Life After a Breakup: Get Crystal Clear on What You Actually Want - Move beyond "I want to be...
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My Biggest Lessons from 2025 Ep. 159
Breakup to Blessing
In this deeply personal episode, I'm sharing the most important lessons and reflections from my own growth journey this year. This isn't me speaking from my therapist lens—it's me as a human navigating the messy, uncomfortable, necessary work of growth. What You'll Learn: Learning to Be Okay with the Hard Why resistance makes everything worse, and how accepting discomfort changes everything Growth Requires Increasing Your Capacity Why you can't have different results without becoming a different version of yourself Taking Responsibility for Your Own Happiness How I stopped making my...
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Announcement: Free Masterclass - How to Move On and Make 2026 Your Breakthrough Year
Breakup to Blessing
Quick bonus episode with an important announcement! I have a free live masterclass happening next week that I created specifically to help you kickstart your new year and finally move on from your ex. Live Masterclass Details: When: Monday, December 29th at 6pm AEST Where: Register at or check the link in show notes Cost: FREE Replay: Available for all registrants (perfect if you can't make it live due to time zones) What This Masterclass Will Cover: Why you feel like your feelings are outside of your control and how that keeps you paralyzed Why it's not your fault (and nothing to be...
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Breakup Recovery During Holidays: Coping Strategies That Actually Work Ep. 157
Breakup to Blessing
The holidays can be brutal when you're still healing from a breakup. Everyone else seems to be celebrating with their loved ones while you're on the outside looking in. This episode isn't about making you feel better with platitudes—it's about empowering you to take control of your story. In this episode, I'm getting real about why sitting in hopelessness keeps you stuck, and what you can do right now to start building the life you actually want. Because the truth is, no one is coming to save you. But the good news? You have everything you need to save yourself. What You'll Learn: Why...
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No Contact Challenge Day 8 (FINALE): Moving Forward With Intention & Starting Your Next Chapter Ep. 156
Breakup to Blessing
You did it. You made it through 28 days of choosing yourself when it felt impossible. Now what? In this FINAL episode of the 28-Day No Contact Challenge, we're talking about what happens next. The challenge might be ending, but your journey is just beginning. This episode covers how to move forward with intention, stay connected to yourself, trust your judgment again, and build a next chapter you're genuinely excited about - plus two special bonuses to support your continued transformation. What You'll Learn: Why completing 28 days is the foundation, not the finish line How to avoid...
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No Contact Challenge Day 7: Are You Healed or Just Feeling Better? The 5 Signs You're Ready Ep. 155
Breakup to Blessing
You've made it through the hardest part - but what happens after day 28? And how do you make sure you don't just repeat the same patterns with someone new? In Episode 7 of the 28-Day No Contact Challenge, we're looking ahead. No contact isn't forever - it's meant to give you space to heal and gain clarity. This episode reveals the 5 signs you're actually ready to move forward, what healthy love looks like (so you can finally recognize it), and the deeper work you need to do to break your patterns for good. What You'll Learn: The 5 signs that tell you you're actually healed (not just...
info_outlineYou can picture your past with them and you were planning a future with them - but can you picture yourself without them? If the answer is no, this episode is for you.
In Episode 5 of the 28-Day No Contact Challenge, we're diving into something uncomfortable but essential: who you actually are outside of this relationship. We'll explore how you lost yourself, what you've been settling for instead of what you actually need, and how to start rebuilding an identity that's genuinely yours.
What You'll Learn:
- What a relationship identity crisis is (and why you're experiencing one)
- The questions you need to ask yourself about who you were before them
- What parts of yourself you minimized, hid, or gave up in the relationship
- The difference between your actual needs and what you've been settling for
- Why you keep repeating the same relationship patterns (and the beliefs driving them)
- How to rebuild your identity from the inside out (not just "pick up old hobbies")
- Why building a relationship with yourself comes before finding healthy love with someone else
Key Topics Covered:
- How the "me" and "we" blur in relationships (and why that's a problem)
- Were you happy in the relationship or just happy to be in a relationship?
- The subtle ways you made yourself smaller to fit
- Confusing intensity for compatibility (passion isn't the same as security)
- Core needs vs wants: emotional safety, consistency, respect for autonomy
- Accepting breadcrumbs and calling it a meal
- Why reconnecting inward comes before going outward
- Developing self-awareness while living your life (not obliviously)
This Episode Is For You If:
You struggle to imagine a future without them in it, you can't answer "what do you like to do?" without referencing the relationship, you've realized you don't know who you are anymore, you keep choosing the same type of person, or you suspect you've been settling for less than you deserve.
The Hard Questions You Need to Ask:
- Before this relationship, what made you feel alive? Did those things fall away?
- What parts of yourself did you minimize or hide to fit the relationship?
- Were you happy in the relationship, or happy with the idea of being in a relationship?
- Were your actual needs being met - consistently, not just when things were good?
- What's familiar about this heartbreak? Have you felt this way before?
- What role do you play in relationships - the giver, the fixer, the one who tries harder?
- Why do you accept less than what you need?
The Pattern You're Repeating:
Maybe you keep choosing emotionally unavailable people. Maybe you keep attracting people who need fixing. Maybe you give too much too soon and lose yourself every time. These patterns happen because of core beliefs about yourself, what you deserve, and what love is supposed to look like.
How to Actually Rebuild Your Identity:
Step 1: Reconnect inward FIRST
- Pay attention to your physical and emotional world throughout the day
- Develop self-awareness before trying to "fix" your life with activities
- Be connected to the process while living your life
Step 2: Then go outward
- Try new activities while being aware of how they make you feel
- Learn new skills that force you to focus (instruments, sports, etc.)
- Notice what feels right vs what you're forcing
Key Quote:
"You won't find lasting, healthy love with someone else until you have that foundation within yourself. Someone else can't fill a void you haven't learned to fill yourself."
Action Steps This Week:
- List who you were before - Your interests, goals, quirks before the relationship. What changed? What did you lose? What do you want to reclaim?
- Identify your 3 core needs - Not wants, but non-negotiables. Were they consistently met in your last relationship?
- Do one thing just for you - Nothing to do with your ex, healing, or future relationships. Something that makes you feel like yourself.
- 20 minutes of complete solitude - No phone, no distractions. Go to the beach or a park. Just sit with yourself. Notice what comes up.
Truth Bomb:
Were you accepting breadcrumbs and calling it a main meal? Did you make excuses like "they're just going through a tough time" or "they're not good at expressing emotions"? It's time to get honest about what you've been settling for.