Libsyn Directory

I feel Powerless

Release Date: 07/02/2024

A Thousand Tiny Steps

I didn’t know what to do. This is a story about the first time I realized something wasn’t right… and how long that moment stays with you. Connect with me: Transcript: It was a sunny summer afternoon in 1979. I was wearing a gold polyester uniform. I was a waitress at Weeks Family Restaurant. It was my first actual real job, and I loved it. Interacting with people, talking to people you would never talk to. I loved the people I worked with. As I looked toward the front of the restaurant, I saw a gentleman come in and sit at the counter. So I went down to...

Underestimated, Overlooked, and Outcast

A Thousand Tiny Steps

As I watched Colin Kaepernick’s documentary, I thought about the times in my life I felt rejected, times I felt underestimated by the men in my life, and the times I felt outcast by different groups and like I’m constantly walking a path trying to find the right one. Key Takeaways: [2:18] Colin Kaepernick's documentary: rejection is not failure, but calibration [4:09] Colin being adopted and feeling like a second choice [6:02] I feel like a second choice in many ways [8:43] What does recalibration and rejection even mean? [12:37] Trust your power, even when...

What Street Am I On?

A Thousand Tiny Steps

I read the most wonderful piece of writing that is short, but so impactful because in five chapters it made me think through all the crap in my life that hasn’t gone well, but also to the future and what I could do with it. As I continue into March, I do so with trepidation - and perhaps, just a little hope. Key Takeaways: [1:08] Missing Gracie, keeping time, the CrossFit Open, weight gain, and my newsletter [4:47] An autobiography in five chapters [6:46] Chapter one: traumatic things that have hobbled me [7:43] Chapter two: my weight gain [9:10] Chapter three: my...

Life Gives More Questions Than Answers

A Thousand Tiny Steps

It’s crazy to think about how many people I’ve connected with and I’ll never meet them. How many times I’ll stand in a subway, wonder if I knew a person from school, and never find out. Because life doesn’t always give us answers, but it always gives us choices. Which ones are right and wrong? Well, I’ll be here with you as I find out. Key Takeaways: [1:23] Is it about the destination or the journey? [3:17] I’m just left pondering and ruminating [6:08] The show Ripple is so reflective of my life right now [11:46] Thinking of how we’re connected to...

Karma is Fake

A Thousand Tiny Steps

I have a lot of anxiety and resentment present in me right now and in my never ending quest to understand how I got here, I turned to something truly holy: memes. They led me where I didn’t expect, which was down a path of contemplation of what karma really means and how what I can get done in 15 minutes changes by the day. Key Takeaways: [0:39] Having a lot of anxiety right now [2:41] Toxic positivity [3:27] Americanized karma is crap [6:51] The Great Law [8:40] The Law of Creation [10:11] The Law of Humility [13:56] The Law of Personal...

What is Family?

A Thousand Tiny Steps

As usual on nights I can’t sleep I turned on the TV and into the most amazing series on a woman’s children who are kidnapped by the father and the tension that ensues. It made me think about what a family is, how that defines us, the societal rules around it, and what role domestic violence leaves people. Key Takeaways: [0:49] The show: No One Saw Us Leave is amazing! [2:30] The patriarchy in this really struck a chord with me [5:18] Vicarious violence and second order violence [7:26] Equality is not the same thing as equity [10:10] The nuclear family and...

Move Over Boomer! I’m a Jones.

A Thousand Tiny Steps

I finally found the term that describes me: Generation Jones. Not a Baby Boomer, but not quite Gen X either. The in-between that’s sandwiched between two generations and as I talked with my friends I realized many of them felt the same way. Key Takeaways: [0:30] So I’m technically a boomer - but I’m not [3:01] I’m a generation Jones [4:35] Biggest difference between baby boomers and gen jones [6:01] The political and technological differences [11:57] Idealists vs realists [14:07] Feeling like you don’t belong in a generation [14:53] Keeping...

Barb (okay, Boomer) V.S. Gen Z Gracie

A Thousand Tiny Steps

One Boomer. One Gen Z. Who will prevail? In this battle of wits both generations hash out what Riz means, how to use a landline, and if crop tops were truly a move forward in fashion. It’s going to get groovy - with a little turbulence! So hold on to your seats, sit back, put your oxygen mask on first, and enjoy the episode. Key Takeaways: [2:02] How did you find info without the internet? [3:28] Slang: cap, riz, stand on business [6:32] Did you have to rewind a VHS or use a payphone? [7:39] What’s a Tamagotchi? [8:04] How did you entertain...

Taking Care of My Aging Mother

A Thousand Tiny Steps

As my mother ages and new challenges arise, my life is becoming increasingly complex and overwhelming as I try to find a way forward that preserves my mother’s dignity and my sanity. Part of me feels like there is a reason to charge forward with my work and the other part of me feels like giving up. Key Takeaways: [1:31] The Netflix documentary Empty Rooms [5:58] My mother living with us has been a struggle [9:54] Not having my own space [12:24] My mother has this expectation that she just gets things [16:09] I never thought my adult parent would live with me ...

My Most Impactful Guests

A Thousand Tiny Steps

As I am still battling the flu, running my household, spending most of my day sleeping, and binge watching TV shows I’ve had time to think. It’s given me time to think about my mindset, where I live, what I’m doing next, and it’s given me time to look over the wonderful guests I’ve had that continue to inspire me. Key Takeaways: [1:23] Binging Stranger Things and realizing the choices in front of me [5:58] Shows involving time travel and grief [9:23] Being sick, sleeping a majority of the day, and calling myself a victim [11:52] Is my...

More Episodes

To kick off the theme of season 9, I’m talking about Alcoholics Anonymous and my struggle with addiction. I discuss what AA is like, what I learned, how I feel powerless, and how I’m trying to improve my life.

Key Takeaways:

[4:56] Still struggling to get where I want to go

[7:52] My time in AA and the most significant thing I learned

[11:36] My moment of feeling powerless

[12:23] Step one of AA

[13:52] The poem that spoke to me about powerlessness

[17:35] Having to be honest in AA

[20:26] The ego is selfish, but is it sin?

[29:41] I’ve felt powerless through my abuse and being a woman

[38:00] I’ve never felt like God was absent in my life

[44:07] I’m doing things, but I need to get more comfortable asking for help

[47:04] I try to control things in my life which can cause trouble