Would You Rather...
A Thousand Tiny Steps
This week, I’m throwing away toxic gratitude and playing Would You Rather because we all need some fun in our lives. I contemplate knowing when vs knowing how I would die, someone seeing all of my photos or all of my texts, and so many other ponderings. Key Takeaways: [0:28] Throwing away toxic gratitude and playing would you rather [3:17] See a little into the future or a lot? [3:53] The ability to read minds or move things? [4:25] Sing or dance to every song you hear? [4:45] Jail or coma for 5 years? [5:15] Chronically under or...
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What is Emergence?
A Thousand Tiny Steps
Emerging and changing my ways one tiny step at a time is not easy. Between school board, my living situation, my neighbor dying and my desire to keep things the same, but also change can feel like climbing an uphill battle. Key Takeaways: [0:28] We’re supposed to be grateful in November, but I don’t want to be [2:35] What emergence means in my life [7:37] Feeling ignored and not liked on school board [11:24] My desire to change, but keep things the same [18:15] Having no time alone at home, but having to share [21:42] Thinking about...
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My Nightmare Coaching Job
A Thousand Tiny Steps
I was fired from my coaching job, dealt with an inappropriate dad, an emotionally unstable teenager, and people that shot me nasty looks. All while having an unsupportive administrative staff that didn’t have my back. This is the story of the ups and downs of my coaching job at Bow. Key Takeaways: [3:21] Being hired at Bow High School as a coach [5:55] The new athletic director hated me [9:42] Our first meeting he chastised me for talking about Molly too much [10:53] Transportation and me having the kids in my personal car became a problem [12:19] Where the...
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Re-Air: Ep. 113 - The Power of Friendship
A Thousand Tiny Steps
I looked back on the two friends I’ve lost since I recorded this episode and the ones I’ve kept. In this episode, I thought about the people I surrounded myself with, what that meant, and the wonderful support I receive. It’s interesting to look back and see the toxic people I spent time with and how much my life has changed since then. Key Takeaways: [0:00] Getting sucked into a cycle of mistreatment [4:15] Fight, flight, fawn, and freeze [7:02] Susan is someone who brings me so much joy [9:40] Roberta learns so much about me through my...
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Lions, Tigers, and Another Restraining Order… Oh My!
A Thousand Tiny Steps
I’ve lost count of how many restraining orders have been in my life from either me having to file them, helping others file them, or having them filed against me. At some point it just feels like a circus and an abuse of the system. In this episode, I break down the history of them in my life and question if they really help people. Key Takeaways: [0:00] Does a restraining order actually do anything? [1:57] My restraining order against Science Guy [4:16] Helping Amy get a restraining order and then filing for one against her [12:32] Losing my job and...
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Science Guy Died
A Thousand Tiny Steps
Science Guy was my high school biology teacher who I lost my virginity to. He died a couple of months ago and I only found out a few weeks ago. I’m grieving for him and many people have an opinion on that. But two things can be true: I can realize the good moments we had together and also realize it was inappropriate. Key Takeaways: [0:00] Being sexually abused as a child and being told to be quiet [4:20] Science guy died a few months ago, reeling in the good and bad [11:35] Feeling wanted by an older man and joining track to spend time with him [16:29]...
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Re-Air: Ep. 64 - My Childhood Sexual Abuse
A Thousand Tiny Steps
I was sexually abused as a child and it still impacts me at almost 60 years old. It took me a long time to be able to tell this story and to look back at the psychological impact that these terrible experiences had on me. It was a confusing time where I lost so much of myself, but telling this story has been cathartic. If you need help there are resources below. Key Takeaways: [2:45] My mom was a stay at home mother and my dad worked a lot [4:20] First instance of sexual abuse [6:46] It happening again and feeling terrible for not saying...
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Re-Air: Ep. 55 - The Lows and Highs of my Sophomore Year
A Thousand Tiny Steps
My sophomore year was full of ups and downs. I went into the year not knowing where to sit at lunch, and unsure of myself. I ended up going to Germany, quitting gymnastics, joining the cheer team, and becoming a track star. As all these amazing things happened, I spent more time with my teacher, science guy, which quickly became something more. Key Takeaways: [8:30] Going to gymnastics camp again and feeling harassed [11:03] Gymnastics camp giving me a social life [12:36] My eventful first day of 10th grade as a cheerleader [13:58] Mr. Smith made such an impact on my life...
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The Mental Load of Motherhood
A Thousand Tiny Steps
As I Mother both my mom and my children at the same time, it made me contemplate what a mother is, all the things I take on, and how that impacts me. It made me think about growing up and how parenting is seen so differently these days. In this episode, I explore how my life has impacted my parenting. Key Takeaways: [0:39] The mental load that mothers have to take on and what it means to be one [4:03] Having to take care of my mom and still be a mom myself [5:56] How my childhood impacted what I think a good mom is [12:02] How the younger generations have...
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Re-Air: Ep. 18 - Trauma Bonds in Grief
A Thousand Tiny Steps
As a result of trauma, boundaries have been a lifelong struggle for me. From my friendship with Robin, my friendship with Steph, and my job loss at Bow boundary crossing has followed me. I explore these 3 events in my life and how trauma has affected them. In this episode, not only do I share my journey with trauma, but also what I have begun to learn about my behavior. Key Takeaways: [1:15] My struggle with setting boundaries as a result of trauma [8:58] My friendship with Robin [15:21] Getting legal support from the wrong person [17:59] How my friendship with...
info_outlineThis week, I’m throwing away toxic gratitude and playing Would You Rather because we all need some fun in our lives. I contemplate knowing when vs knowing how I would die, someone seeing all of my photos or all of my texts, and so many other ponderings.
Key Takeaways:
[0:28] Throwing away toxic gratitude and playing would you rather
[3:17] See a little into the future or a lot?
[3:53] The ability to read minds or move things?
[4:25] Sing or dance to every song you hear?
[4:45] Jail or coma for 5 years?
[5:15] Chronically under or overdressed?
[5:35] Lose my sight or my memories?
[5:55] Universal respect or unlimited power?
[6:29] No internet or no air conditioning?
[7:09] Never be able to go out in the day or night?
[7:30] Personal maid or chef?
[7:46] Lead star in a movie that bombs or extra in an Oscar winning one?
[8:34] Only text in emoji or not text at all?
[8:47] Same socks or same underwear for a week?
[9:04] Sing off with Ariana Grande or Rihanna?
[9:25] Alone in a forest or a real haunted house?
[9:52] Child every year for 20 years or no kids at all?
[10:24] Gassy on a first date or your wedding night?
[10:46] Hunt for your own meat or never eat meat again?
[11:05] People spread lies about you or terrible truths?
[11:58] Best at something no one respects or average at something they do?
[12:42] Travel the world for free for a year or have $50,000?
[13:27] Mullet for a year or bald for 6 months?
[13:51] Go back to the past to see dead people or the future to meet grandkids?
[14:05] Stay physically how you are forever or financially?
[14:32] No phone for a month or no bathing for a month?
[14:52] Change the outcome of the last election or decide the next election?
[15:27] Lose the ability to read or lose the ability to speak?
[15:58] Beautiful and stupid or unattractive and smart?
[16:25] Always stuck in traffic but find the perfect parking spot or the opposite?
[16:57] Go on tour with Elton John or Cher?
[17:20] Win the lottery and spend it in a day or triple your current salary forever?
[17:52] Hear a comforting lie or an uncomfortable truth?
[18:03] Someone sees all your photos or all your texts?
[18:21] 4th of July with Taylor Swift or Christmas Eve with Mariah Carey?
[19:13] Peaceful life in a small cabin or drama filled in a mansion?
[19:35] Be invisible or fly?
[19:50] Be the leader on Earth or start another colony on another planet?
[20:11] Back to kindergarten with all my knowledge or know everything now?
[22:04] Read minds or predict the future?
[22:13] Be an unknown superhero or famous villain?
[22:48] Have a third eye or a third ear?
[23:13] Wake up naked in a forest 5 miles from home or in your underwear at work?
[23:52] Be reincarnated as a fly or just stop existing when dead?
[24:11] Close any open door or be unable to open any closed door?
[24:32] Work alongside Dwight or Homer?
[24:55] Punished for a crime you didn’t commit or credit stolen for a major accomplishment of yours?
[25:20] Celine or Eminem perform the soundtrack to your life?
[25:38] Bathe in dish water or wash dishes in bath water?
[25:50] Have your own theme park or zoo?
[26:05] Know when or how you’re going to die?
[26:21] Home with no electricity or home with no running water?
[26:43] Tea with Queen Elizabeth or beer with Prince Harry?
[27:08] Live the same day over for a year or take 3 years off your life?
[27:39] Finding balance, gratitude, and what would you rather?
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