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Episode 259: Stop Preventing the Saints From Doing their Job! The Psychology of Devotion with Dr. Gerard McNicholas

Being Human

Release Date: 12/30/2025

Episode 291: OCPD and Scrupulosity: How the Worship of Rules and Control Leads to the Loneliness of Certainty show art Episode 291: OCPD and Scrupulosity: How the Worship of Rules and Control Leads to the Loneliness of Certainty

Being Human

Certainty feels like safety. But you can only ever be certain alone — and the life you build on control slowly becomes a lonely one. In week two of the series on OCPD, Dr. Greg explores why we reach for control when trust feels dangerous — and how the certainty we build to feel safe ends up costing us the very relationships it was meant to protect. Key Topics: Why the certainty that makes you feel safe is the same thing that leaves you alone How a rule can feel safer than a person — because a rule never changes its face Why the control you use to protect the people you love can drive...

info_outline Episode 290: “I’m Only Loved When I’m Perfect”: The Lie Fueling Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder show art Episode 290: “I’m Only Loved When I’m Perfect”: The Lie Fueling Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder

Being Human

Perfectionism doesn't always come from loving excellence. Sometimes it's the only way you've ever known how to feel safe. In the first episode of a new series on Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder, Dr. Greg unpacks how perfectionism, rigidity, and control take root—and why, underneath them, control quietly fills the space where trust was supposed to be. Key Topics: Why the pursuit of perfection is often less about loving excellence and more about not feeling safe without it How "until I'm perfect, I'm not loved" becomes the sentence an entire personality gets built on Why one small...

info_outline Episode 289: You Can’t Heal What You Won’t Face: How Presence Breaks the Cycle of Fear show art Episode 289: You Can’t Heal What You Won’t Face: How Presence Breaks the Cycle of Fear

Being Human

Avoidance works. That's the problem. Every time you dodge the hard thing, the relief is real—and so is the price you don't see coming. In this final episode of the series on avoidance, Dr. Greg makes the case that the way out isn't escape or a burst of willpower, but presence: staying in the room one second longer than you want to, and letting God meet you in the mess you were trying to hide. Key Topics: Why the relief avoidance gives you is exactly what keeps you stuck Why good therapy and mentorship refuse to hand you advice—and why that's what actually heals How even "staying present"...

info_outline Episode 288: Why “Everything Happens for a Reason” Isn’t Working: The Holy Words We Use to Avoid Healing show art Episode 288: Why “Everything Happens for a Reason” Isn’t Working: The Holy Words We Use to Avoid Healing

Being Human

"Offer it up." "I've forgiven them." "Everything happens for a reason." Every one of them is true—and every one can become a way to avoid the healing God is actually offering. In this episode, Dr. Greg names spiritual bypassing: using prayer, devotion, and even good theology to step around grief, anger, and the wounds still waiting underneath. He explains why grace builds on nature, and why God heals only the humanity we're willing to bring into the light. Key Topics: Why the one escape nobody warns you about is the one everyone applauds: prayer, retreats, "offering it up" How "I've already...

info_outline Episode 287: We Are Not Robots: Why Connection Is Not Optional for Human Flourishing show art Episode 287: We Are Not Robots: Why Connection Is Not Optional for Human Flourishing

Being Human

There’s a lot of talk recently about whether AI can be considered a person. But the more serious question might be whether people are becoming too much like AI—learning to live without real connection. To keep our distance. To avoid vulnerability. To convince ourselves that we don’t need anyone. In this episode, Dr. Greg continues the series on avoidance by turning to schizoid personality: the pattern where the wish for connection hasn’t just been buried by fear, but has gone quiet altogether. Drawing on the personalism of St. John Paul II, he shows why we stay made out of...

info_outline Episode 286: A Mental Tug of War: Inside the Avoidant Mind and the Burden of Being Known show art Episode 286: A Mental Tug of War: Inside the Avoidant Mind and the Burden of Being Known

Being Human

Avoidance looks like not wanting people. It's almost always the opposite: wanting connection so badly that being seen feels like the biggest risk of all. In this episode, Dr. Greg explores avoidant personality patterns through the lens of Catholic anthropology—where the quiet tug-of-war between longing to be known and fearing rejection comes from, and how the difference between what happens in us and what we choose opens a path toward freedom. Key Topics: Why "I just need my space" can be a wall dressed up as a boundary How a childhood full of real love—not neglect—can still teach you...

info_outline Episode 285: Venting Isn’t Always Healing: The Difference Between Sharing Truth and Feeding Resentment show art Episode 285: Venting Isn’t Always Healing: The Difference Between Sharing Truth and Feeding Resentment

Being Human

Getting it all off your chest is supposed to be healing. But sometimes the venting that feels like relief is quietly feeding your resentment instead. In this episode, Dr. Greg sits down with Fr. Gregory Pine—author of Training the Tongue—to explore why the deepest purpose of speech is communion, and how to tell the difference between working through your pain and simply settling the score. Key Topics: Why the real purpose of speech isn’t expressing yourself — it’s communion How to tell whether you’re venting toward healing or just venting to settle the score Why the friend who...

info_outline Episode 284: Stop Chasing Spiritual Highs: Why Real Healing Happens in the Ordinary show art Episode 284: Stop Chasing Spiritual Highs: Why Real Healing Happens in the Ordinary

Being Human

Your prayer life can be how you avoid healing. In this final episode of the antisocial series, Dr. Greg unpacks why a retreat high or a powerful devotional moment can convince you the healing is done — when the actual work hasn't started yet, and why that work happens in the small, unglamorous moments nobody puts on a holy card.  Key Topics: Why the most moving retreat of your life can leave you exactly the same — and what actually changes you What "magical penance" reveals about the parts of us that prefer grand gestures to real repair Why healing happens in what you do on an...

info_outline Episode 283: “I Will Never Be Hurt Again”: How Jesus’ Sacred Heart Breaks the Cycle show art Episode 283: “I Will Never Be Hurt Again”: How Jesus’ Sacred Heart Breaks the Cycle

Being Human

A hardened heart isn’t where the story starts. It’s what’s left after a child trusted, got hurt, and concluded: I’ll never be in that position again. This week, Dr. Greg turns the antisocial series toward hope: looking at how that hardness forms, and how the Sacred Heart of Jesus, betrayed and pierced yet still open, breaks the pattern. Key Topics: Why a hardened heart is never cold by nature—it’s protection learned the first time trusting backfired Why the urge to control everyone around you is really an old strategy for never being at anyone’s mercy again How “making up for...

info_outline Episode 282: You're (Probably) Not a Serial Killer—But You May Share Some of Their Antisocial Traits show art Episode 282: You're (Probably) Not a Serial Killer—But You May Share Some of Their Antisocial Traits

Being Human

You're probably not a serial killer. But the patterns that shape one run through all of us, at lower volume. In this episode, Dr. Greg traces antisocial patterns back to their source in everyday life — how we manage people, pray, and protect ourselves from being hurt again. Key Topics: Why the patterns that define serial killers aren't limited to serial killers — and how to see yourself honestly in that mirror How omnipotent control can look like loyalty, competence, or even holiness — and what it's protecting underneath What "magical penance" looks like when atonement becomes a form of...

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More Episodes

The saints aren’t waiting to be admired — they’re actively trying to help us right now. In this episode, Dr. Greg sits down with Dr. Gerard McNicholas to unpack the psychology of devotion, what a living relationship with the saints can look like, and why the “messiness” that sometimes shows up during consecrations may actually be where God is doing His most personal work.

Key Topics:

  • Why Dr. Greg says most of us “block” the saints.
  • How devotion becomes a real relationship instead of just a pious habit.
  • When consecrations stir up drama—and why that can be a good sign.
  • The psychology behind spiritual “trends” and jumping into devotions too fast.
  • How scrupulosity and the “tyranny of the shoulds” hijack your prayer life.
  • Why St. Joseph and Our Lady want to be part of your daily life.
  • A simple four-step way to ride out anxiety and spiritual desolation.
  • How friendship and Ignatian wisdom keep you from panicking in hard seasons.
  • Why letting the saints “do their job” can change how you suffer.


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