The Creature From The Black Lagoon (1954)
Bill Watches Movies
In which we bid a fond farewell to the show, by taking a look at my favorite monster movie of all time, “The Creature From The Black Lagoon”, listen to some goodbyes and some final feedback during intermission, and turn off the projector one last time. Bonus points for Hot Number Julie Adams memories, the explanation of the number 346, more information about my childhood than you ever needed to know (including disco) and a heartfelt goodbye to all my Gentle Listeners. I love you all.
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Plan 9 From Outer Space (1959)
Bill Watches Movies
In which we scrap Plans 1 through 8, and decide to take over the planet Earth using Plan 9, which involves Sassy UFO Based Drag Queen Overlords, Reanimated Dead People who probably wish they had remained un-animated, Paper Plate Flying Saucers, and a Fabulous Space Station in dire need of a Queer Eye For The Space Guy makeover. Bonus points for Zombie Tor Johnson, On Point Vampira Make-Up, Chiropractic Fake Shemp, and a Blink And You'll Miss It Ed Wood, Jr. cameo.
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Robot Monster (1953)
Bill Watches Movies
In which a race of advanced interstellar beings who look suspiciously like gorillas wearing diving helmets with antenna on top, visit Earth and decide that they're going to kill everyone on the planet and then make it a nice vacation getaway for themselves, only to be thwarted by one of their own falling in love with the last remaining woman of legal age on said planet. Bonus points for unrequited gorilla love, unexplained triceratops wrasslin', incorrect genocidal mathematics, heavy petting in the bushes, and unexplained cave entrance bubbles.
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Horror of Dracula (1958)
Bill Watches Movies
In which two acknowledged masters of the horror genre meet again under the Hammer Films banner, but this time, instead of one giving life to the other, one is decidedly trying to end the life of the other, as Sir Peter Cushing as Doctor Van Helsing, and Sir Christopher Lee as Count Dracula, chase each other through hell and half of Klausenberg in this month's film. Bonus points for custom bound journals, bespoke vampire wear for the big and tall, bureaucratic border guard buffoonery, and of course, sheer negligees, bright red Giallo blood and heaving bosoms filled with vampiric Big Daddy...
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Scanners (1981)
Bill Watches Movies
In which a Gentle Canadian Hobo with the aid of a Beautiful Woman On The Run, and a Sage Teacher With A Secret, discovers his true family history, finds love (maybe) and learns how to channel and use his psychic powers, which includes the ability to make people’s heads explode. Bonus points for Self-Trepanning, Angry Patrick McGoohan Overacting, Psychic Group Sex, and Pornstache Les Nessman Cranial Removal.
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Danger: Diabolik (1968)
Bill Watches Movies
In which we discover that crime actually does pay, and pay quite well. Starring a Gentleman Thief with Dreamy Grey Eyes, a Buxom Blonde Assistant, and a Disheveled Always One Step Behind Police Inspector, we travel to Italy for a very good Mario Bava Comic Book Movie, in the Diabolik Cinematic Universe. Bonus points for multiple Jaguars (car, not the cat), multiple make-out sessions, and literally rolling around in money while totally, totally doing it.
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The Monster of Piedras Blancas (1959)
Bill Watches Movies
In which we have a meeting of The Creature From The Black Lagoon Fan Club, and decide whether or not to allow a new member from the coast of California into the organization. They seem to have the right amount of lust, aggression, age and close proximity to water, so we’ll at least give them a chance to plead their case. Bonus points for teenage heavy petting, cranky lighthouse keeping, cigar chewing law enforcement, wanton bloodletting and stentorian sermons from the town doctor.
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The X From Outer Space (1967)
Bill Watches Movies
In which The Greater Tokyo Area is yet again attacked by a giant monster, and the combined military needs their collective fats pulled out of the fire by an astronaut team that makes F Troop look like Mensa members. Bonus points for Bic lighter based jet engines, awkward and unrequited love, girls taking showers together, and the overzealous use of menthol shaving cream in the weirdest way possible.
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The Curse of Frankenstein (1957)
Bill Watches Movies
In which two giants of the horror genre meet for the first time, one playing a prissy fussbudget bent on playing God and creating man in a very, very ugly image, and the other playing said man, bent on teaching the prissy fussbudget a lesson for bringing him back from the dead when he was perfectly happy in the afterlife. Bonus points for Sir Peter Cushing, Sir Christopher Lee and various and sundry Gothic trappings such as castles, maids, hoop skirts and well-lit heaving breasts.
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The Bloody Pit of Horror (1965)
Bill Watches Movies
In which we learn that crime does not pay, and that all trespassers will be punished severely via various torture devices, right after the seemingly abandoned castle owner, who thinks that he is the reincarnation of a long dead executioner puts on his little wrestling/torturing outfit. Bonus points for numerous revealing outfit changes by the young nubile actresses, excessive Space Age Bachelor Pad music, and of course, Mickey Hargitay's beautiful body that would drive a preacher's daughter to leave the Lord.
info_outlineIn which a Gentle Canadian Hobo with the aid of a Beautiful Woman On The Run, and a Sage Teacher With A Secret, discovers his true family history, finds love (maybe) and learns how to channel and use his psychic powers, which includes the ability to make people’s heads explode.
Bonus points for Self-Trepanning, Angry Patrick McGoohan Overacting, Psychic Group Sex, and Pornstache Les Nessman Cranial Removal.