Why "That's Not Fair!" Is Actually a Teaching Moment
Release Date: 01/07/2026
Why Your Teenage Son Doesn't Trust You
Challenging Teenage Sons
In this powerful conclusion to our consequences series, Dr. Mark Schillinger reveals the deeper purpose behind positive discipline. It's not just about changing your son's behavior. It's about being able to respect yourself as a parent for the rest of your life. *** Resources Mentioned *** Young Men's Ultimate Weekend @YMUWorg Rite of passage program for boys ages 13-20 *** More Resources *** On-demand and live, online workshops for teenagers and young men are available here: https://cts.drmarkmentor.com/workshops For a complimentary 20-minute consultation with...
info_outline
Why "That's Not Fair!" Is Actually a Teaching Moment
Challenging Teenage Sons
Does your teenager constantly tell you "it's not fair"? Do you find yourself offering bigger and bigger rewards just to get them to take out the garbage? In this episode, Dr. Mark Schillinger breaks down why bribes and rewards actually backfire with teens, and shares the mentoring approach that builds real responsibility and self-respect. You'll learn how to stop negotiating with your "house lawyer" and start raising a young person who takes ownership of their life. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why "it's not fair" is actually a learning opportunity, not a problem to solve The...
info_outline
How Parents Can Enforce Phone Limits at Home
Challenging Teenage Sons
Dr. Mark Schillinger breaks down Australia's groundbreaking decision to ban social media for children under 16 and shares why this matters for parents everywhere, even if your country hasn't passed similar laws. Discover the brain science behind teenage phone addiction, why your teen struggles to self-regulate their screen time, and Dr. Mark's practical approach to starting the conversation about device limits in your home. Plus, learn the difference between consequences and punishment when it comes to enforcing new boundaries. Resources On-demand and live, online workshops...
info_outline
Stop Punishing, Start Mentoring: Transform Your Relationship With Your Teen Son
Challenging Teenage Sons
Struggling to get your teenage son to cooperate? You're not alone, and it's harder now than ever before. In this episode, Dr. Mark Schillinger breaks down why modern teens resist helping at home and what you can do about it. In This Episode, You'll Discover: The historical shift that took cooperation out of our kids' DNA, from tribal living through the educational revolution to today's smartphone addiction Why treating consequences as punishments pushes your teen further away (and what to do instead) The critical difference between "right," "not right," and "wrong" behaviors, and how this...
info_outline
How to Give Consequences Without Yelling at Your Teenager
Challenging Teenage Sons
Your teenage son breaks curfew again. He ignores responsibilities. He pushes back on everything. You try consequences, but nothing sticks. Sound familiar? In this episode, Dr. Mark Schillinger reveals why most consequences fail and what actually works instead. The difference? Staying calm, being clear, and teaching rather than punishing. What You'll Learn: The 4 C's of effective consequences: Calm, Clear, Concise, and Certain Why being "dispassionate" is your secret weapon when your son lashes out How to give your son TWO choices (and why this changes everything) The one...
info_outline
Why Your Teen Ignores Punishments (And What Works Instead)
Challenging Teenage Sons
Tired of yelling at your teenager in the heat of the moment? You're not alone. Most parents confuse punishment with consequences, and their teens know it. In this episode, Dr. Mark Schillinger breaks down the critical difference between reactive punishment (made up when you're angry) and structured consequences (teaching tools built into reality itself). He shares the exact framework he's used with thousands of young men at The Young Men's Ultimate Weekend to help teens understand accountability without the power struggles. You'll discover why "gimme your phone" and "you're grounded" backfire,...
info_outline
Why Parenting Is So Stressful Now: The Collapse Of The Village
Challenging Teenage Sons
Discover why modern parenting feels more stressful than ever in this insightful podcast episode. Dr. Mark Schillinger explores how the collapse of traditional village-style child-rearing has left families struggling in our digital age. Learn why we can't rely on outside forces to rescue our families from digital takeover, and how we can blend the best of ancient parenting wisdom with modern solutions. *** Resources *** Join the free parents' group for daily support and free solutions: On-demand and live, online workshops for teenagers and young men are available here: For...
info_outline
Unite Your Family Before Artificial Intelligence Tears It Apart
Challenging Teenage Sons
In this powerful episode of Challenging Teenage Sons, Dr. Mark Schillinger reveals how artificial intelligence (AI) is changing family dynamics — and what parents must do now to prevent technology from dividing their family. Are your teens more connected to their devices than to you? Are arguments about screen time, gaming, or social media pulling your family apart? Discover practical strategies for parents to strengthen family unity, improve communication, and raise resilient young men in the age of AI. In this episode: • Why AI is a threat to family connection • How testosterone...
info_outline
Using the Both-And Principle: How to Improve Communication & Resolve Conflicts with Your Teen
Challenging Teenage Sons
Do you find yourself stuck in power struggles with your teen? In this episode, Dr. Mark Schillinger, founder of Challenging Teenage Sons and Young Men's Ultimate Weekend, shares how the Both-And Principle can transform the way you communicate with your teenager. Many parents fall into the either-or mindset—either they enforce strict rules OR they show empathy. But what if you could do both? Learn how to: Stay calm and assertive during conflicts Hold boundaries while validating your teen’s emotions Improve respect and connection...
info_outline
Getting Focused: Help Your Son Navigate His Short Attention Span
Challenging Teenage Sons
Discover expert strategies to help your teenage son overcome distractions and boost his focus. Dr. Mark Schillinger—founder of and the —shares his personal journey and decades of experience mentoring young men to turn their short attention span into a strength, and to become skillful at focusing their attention. In this episode, you’ll learn: • How a short attention span can be an asset in a neurodivergent brain • Why mindfulness techniques help regulate your son’s emotions • Practical tips for creating a distraction-free environment and achieving flow state...
info_outlineDoes your teenager constantly tell you "it's not fair"? Do you find yourself offering bigger and bigger rewards just to get them to take out the garbage?
In this episode, Dr. Mark Schillinger breaks down why bribes and rewards actually backfire with teens, and shares the mentoring approach that builds real responsibility and self-respect. You'll learn how to stop negotiating with your "house lawyer" and start raising a young person who takes ownership of their life.
What You'll Learn in This Episode
Why "it's not fair" is actually a learning opportunity, not a problem to solve
The difference between extrinsic rewards (bribes) and intrinsic motivation
How to use the "Both/And" principle when your teen does something right AND wrong
Why most of life is unfair or neutral, and how to prepare your teen for this reality
The 5 C's of calm, confident communication that won't get derailed
Resources Mentioned
Punished by Rewards by Alfie Kohn
Young Men's Ultimate Weekend https://ymuw.org
More Resources
On-demand and live, online workshops for teenagers and young men are available here: https://cts.drmarkmentor.com/workshops
Free Parents' Support Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/markstipsforparents
For a complimentary 20-minute consultation with Dr. Mark or for more information about his parent coaching and mentoring young men, go to https://cts.drmarkmentor.com
About Dr. Mark Schillinger
Dr. Mark Schillinger’s work has been featured on the CNN show “This is Life with Lisa Ling.” These videos are designed to help parents more effectively “challenge” or motivate their teenage sons to become more responsible and resilient. These videos offer straightforward advice so parents can minimize conflict and maximize cooperation with their sons – especially those young men who are distracted by their digital devices. For more information, visit https://www.challengingteenagesons.com
Connect with Dr. Mark
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/challenging.teenage.sons
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/challengingteenagesons/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-mark-schillinger-family-mentor-and-community-leader-735585a/