15: The Final Episode
Ask Your Mother
This episode marks a significant shift in our podcast journey. When it all began in a Miami hotel room back in January 2020, little did I know how my endeavor would evolve, becoming a lifeline of connection and support for both listeners and myself during the pandemic. Our mission for the podcast - to support and assist moms and caregivers, has remained constant throughout. We have tackled diverse questions and adapted to changing circumstances, providing support and calm in stormy times. Now, we are moving in a new direction to allow our message of love and kindness to reach a broader...
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14: Life After Death with Keela Fowler
Ask Your Mother
I am delighted to have a Keela Fowler joining me today to dive into a topic near and dear to both of our hearts and answer a question many of you have been curious about: what happens after losing someone you love? Death can be a catastrophic experience, and it is only natural to wonder when the pain will subside, when the healing will begin, and how life will continue. Keela and I share the common bond of losing our mothers, although our losses occurred at different stages of life. In this episode, we share our experiences, provide insights, and offer a glimpse into the...
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13: Halloween and Kids' Anxiety
Ask Your Mother
Today, I aim to present a novel perspective on Halloween inspired by the numerous questions I have received. The question we are tackling today is, what should a parent do if Halloween is not what their child wants? This issue usually centers on the apprehensions kids may feel about Halloween, kids who do not enjoy the Halloween experience, exceptional kids, or children on the spectrum. But it could also happen in kids with no diagnosable reason why Halloween would be challenging. In those situations, I always feel it is best to revert to the principles I repeatedly emphasize in explicit...
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12: What Do I Want?
Ask Your Mother
This podcast episode marks a new chapter as we step into the world of video for the very first time! My producer convinced me that the possibilities with video are endless, so here we are! Today, I'm embracing a cozy vibe with my favorite Monday T-shirt and my hair freshly washed and left to its natural curls instead of the meticulous look you might be used to. Feel free to check out our YouTube channel for the video experience rather than the audio version. If there are any unexpected quirks or if I need to clarify things differently, it is all part of this exciting transition. Today, I want...
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11: Making Friends
Ask Your Mother
Hey friends! Today's discussion really excites me because the inspiration came from the Women of Wonder community I lead! Stay tuned at the end for more details about this community. The question we explore today is relevant for women of all ages. The tricky part of preparing this episode was coming up with advice that would resonate with women at different stages of life. The question is: How do I make friends as a grown-up? Let me tell you, traversing the intricate landscape of adult friendships is a universal challenge! It is a question that hits close to home for me, and I look...
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12: Career Advice for Mental Health Careers
Ask Your Mother
I am delighted to be back with you, my friends, after our summer break! Our brief hiatus during the summer months was time well spent, as I devoted my energies to nurturing the Women of Wonder community. Today's episode holds a special place in my heart! It stems from a question I posed on Instagram a few months ago about career guidance. Even though my post was intended for general advice, the very first query I received was related to mental health. Given my expertise in that area I decided to tackle this topic personally. I did some extra research to deepen my...
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10: Women of Wonder
Ask Your Mother
Are you feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, or stuck in a cycle of constant fatigue? Have you ever wished for a space where you can freely share your concerns without fear of judgment while connecting with others who truly understand what you are going through? Well, that is just what I have been working tirelessly to create! It has become increasingly clear that many people are battling isolation and burnout, and I can no longer tolerate or ignore that. The Transformative Power of Supportive Communities As a therapist, I have witnessed the transformative power of supportive...
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ENCORE: Grieving for Non-Death Losses
Ask Your Mother
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ENCORE: Having It All and Still Struggling with Depression and Anxiety with Kadi Baker
Ask Your Mother
Many people struggle with depression and anxiety, and we don’t know how to help them. We don’t know how to help because depression and anxiety don’t have a characteristic “look.” Sadly, people who seem to “have it all together” and are “full of fun” are sometimes in a deep, dark pit on the inside. It takes courage to acknowledge the depression and ask for help, and their story can be beautiful, honest, and candid as they share their journey. Today’s guest has been in the darkness, and she’s opening up with the hope of bringing help to others. Join us. Kadi Baker is a...
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ENCORE: Sex, Fun & Female Pleasure with Thien Kim Lam
Ask Your Mother
Thien Kim Lam is unafraid to have uncomfortable conversations about sex. She’s not your typical romance writer because she’s focused on empowering women to enjoy sex and pleasure for themselves. Thien learned a lot as a sex toy sales consultant and eventually she realized that so many issues were with female sexuality were universal and they needed to be addressed in a positive way. She eventually started Bawdy Bookworms to combine the pleasures of romance novels with the pleasures of sex toys. She’s all about bringing back fun and pleasure for all types of women. Join Cristie and Thien...
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I am delighted to have a Keela Fowler joining me today to dive into a topic near and dear to both of our hearts and answer a question many of you have been curious about: what happens after losing someone you love?
Death can be a catastrophic experience, and it is only natural to wonder when the pain will subside, when the healing will begin, and how life will continue. Keela and I share the common bond of losing our mothers, although our losses occurred at different stages of life.
In this episode, we share our experiences, provide insights, and offer a glimpse into the complex territory of coping with life after the death of someone we love. While we cannot predict your unique journey, we hope to shed some light on the path of life after loss.
About Keela
Keela Fowler is a creative person with many different identities. She is a business strategist and former teacher, in addition to being an aunt, a sister, and a daughter who experienced an unexpected loss when her mother passed away in her sleep about five years ago. Since then, she has embarked on a learning journey while transitioning through processing her grief.
The Benefits of Continuing Therapy
Therapy has been a positive experience in Keela’s life. She believes that therapy can benefit everyone because it helps us learn more about ourselves and how we interact with the world and others.
How Grief Evolves
Keela’s loss used to feel overwhelming and all-encompassing, dominating her thoughts from morning until night. However, with time, her coping strategies have shifted that perception. Loss is no longer her first and last thought each day.
Supporting Others Through Grief
Supporting others through their grief gave Keela a deeper understanding of loss. It allowed her to grasp the uniqueness of each grief journey and realize that no one can fully understand or replicate the emotional experience of anyone else.
Choosing to Feel Differently
We can choose to feel differently about grief. Keela grappled with the notion that letting go of the intensity of grief might betray her love for her late mother until she consciously decided to heal and move forward in life.
Self-Validation
Cultivating self-validation is essential, especially when we have nobody to offer support. Finding a healthy source of validation is a crucial aspect of healing.
Talking About Lost Loved Ones
We can keep the memory of our loved ones alive by talking about them. In doing so, we must remember the good things and discuss the fullness of who they were, including their quirks and less favorable traits.
Coping with Grief
After losing someone we love, we must allow the full range of emotions to wash over us. We may find it hard to explain our grief to others, so we should avoid trying to find a silver lining or making sense of things that do not make sense.
Holding Emotion and Functionality Together
It can be challenging to balance intense emotions like grief while continuing our daily tasks and responsibilities. We need to recognize that some people can be sad and grieving while still being able to fulfill all their duties.
Owning Our Emotions
The ability to own and understand our feelings is crucial when navigating grief and interpersonal relationships.
Fear of Losing Control
The quest for control can impede moving through grief. We must do our best to keep things stable after a significant loss and understand that we never have any control over what will happen.
Grief is Love
It may be helpful to understand that grief is love with nowhere to go. We can still find moments of laughter and happiness, even while missing someone we love, because grief evolves and can coexist with joy.
Nurturing a Connection with the Deceased
It may help us feel closer to our deceased loved ones if we talk to them as if they were still present or incorporate some of their qualities into our lives and interactions to carry their positive legacy forward.
Various Stages of Grief
Grief has various stages. So, we may feel different emotions at different times. All we need to do is allow ourselves to fully experience all our feelings without judging ourselves for having them.
Links and resources:
Women of Wonder (W.o.W) Founding Members