3366 Manage Different and Diverse Perspectives in Marriage
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
Release Date: 04/13/2024
4154 Before the Bell Rings
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
There is something about the start of a new school year that carries both excitement and weight. The backpacks are packed, the outfits are picked out, and the alarm is set for a time no one in the house has seen in weeks. But before the bus pulls up, before the shoes are tied and the lunches are grabbed, there is a window of time that belongs to you and your family. And what you do with it matters more than you might think. It's before the bell rings. It's that morning window, the window that doesn't just happen. It is built. And if you are a parent staring down the start of a new school year,...
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4153 One More
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
I know you're tired. I know that thing you've been carrying — that weight you keep picking up every single morning, even though nobody would blame you for setting it down — I know it's heavy. And I know you've told yourself more than once that you're not sure you have another round in you. But here's what I also know: you have one more in you! You're still here. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the . #Inspiration #CreateYourNow #DailyMotivation You're still listening to this. You're still showing up. You're still breathing and fighting and...
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4152 The Woman in the Mirror
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
There's a moment — and if you're honest, you know exactly the one I'm talking about — where you catch your reflection and the first thing that crosses your mind isn't kind. It's not always about what you look like physically, although sometimes it is. More often, it's deeper than that. It's the look in your own eyes that says, I thought I'd be further along by now. It's the quiet measuring of the woman in the mirror that happens when you compare who you are today against who you imagined you'd be at this point. And just like that, the woman staring back at you becomes not enough....
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4151 Design Your Day
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
Why is it that we can pour ourselves into everyone else's schedule, everyone else's crisis, everyone else's to-do list, but when it comes to our own day, we just… wing it? We wake up, already behind before our feet hit the floor, and we spend the next twelve or sixteen hours reacting. Putting out fires. Managing the chaos. Surviving until we can collapse back into bed and do it all over again tomorrow. And somewhere in the middle of all that surviving, we forget the most important thing. Our own day. The one God gave us. The one we will never, ever get back. So design your day! Psalm...
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4150 Stop Going Back
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
Have you ever made a decision, felt good about it for a moment, and then spent the next three days replaying it in your mind like a movie you can't turn off? You made the call. You weighed your options. You moved. And then — almost out of nowhere — the doubt crept in. Did I really think that through? What if I'm wrong? Maybe I should have waited. Stop going back! When we make a decision and clarity stalls, something uncomfortable starts to bubble up. It's the fear of being stuck. Not stuck because the decision was wrong, but stuck because we won't let go of it long enough to see where...
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4149 Overflow with Hope
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
When you feel like all you're doing is running away from or toward all the things, it's hard to find joy and peace in life. You can get down and out about your circumstances, and all hope feels lost. But as Paul says in Romans 15:13, "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Have you ever had one of those seasons where it feels like you're just running? Running toward the next thing on your list. Running away from the thing you don't want to face. Running in circles because you're not even sure...
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4148 Look For Something To Work With
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
There's a moment in every marriage where you have to make a choice. You can stand there replaying every missed pass — every time your spouse came up short, every promise that got fumbled, every "we'll get to it" that never got to anything. Or you can do what the good ones do when the clock is running out. You can look for something to work with. Think about what you do now. Are you one who focuses on what doesn't work? Or are you willing to see what's possible? Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the . #RelationshipBuilders #CreateYourNow...
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4147 Never Miss A Beat
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
Parenting is a never-ending, rhythmic song that plays over and over again. Some of the melodies are soothing to the heart — a sleepy child curled into your shoulder, a shared laugh over something silly at the dinner table, a "thank you, Mom" that comes out of nowhere and undoes you a little. But many more of the notes disrupt the nervous system. The 2 a.m. cries. The slammed doors of the teenage years. The days when you've given everything and it still doesn't feel like enough. However you hear it, you can't run from the most important responsibility in your life. Never miss a beat. Parents,...
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4146 The Circle Isn't Wasted
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
There is a particular kind of tired that comes from walking in circles. You look up and realize you have passed this same tree, this same doubt, this same conversation with yourself, more times than you can count. You are moving; your legs ache to prove it, but the scenery refuses to change. And somewhere in that repetition, you hope that the circle isn't wasted. Because the real question, the one that keeps you up at night, is "does any of this matter if I don't even know where I am?" Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the . #Inspiration...
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4145 Just Because Life Takes An Unexpected Turn
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
Life doesn't always unfold the way we planned. One day the road looks clear, and the next, it curves somewhere we never saw coming. Unexpected turns can leave us feeling disappointed, confused, or uncertain about what is happening in our world and what God is doing in the middle of it. But here is what remains true even when everything else feels shaky: God is never surprised by the path ahead. Just because life takes an unexpected turn, God was not caught off guard, and He is not scrambling to figure out what to do next. "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord in...
info_outlineConflicts are inevitable in the journey of marriage. However, how couples manage different and diverse perspectives in marriage can make all the difference in maintaining a strong and healthy relationship.
Rather than placing blame on their spouse, each spouse can take proactive steps to manage themselves and foster understanding and compromise within the marriage.
Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at Women of IMPACT. https://createyournow.mn.co
Then, you have to consider that when couples constantly hound each other on what they believe is right without looking at their spouse's position or opinion, it can lead to a breakdown in communication and trust within the marriage.
This behavior often stems from a place of ego and a desire to be seen as right or superior, rather than valuing the perspectives and feelings of their partner. This dynamic creates a power struggle within the relationship, where each person is more focused on proving their own point rather than understanding and respecting the other's viewpoint.
Furthermore, when couples engage in constant hounding and dismissiveness towards their partner's opinions, it can create a toxic environment of resentment and frustration. Over time, this can erode the emotional connection between spouses, leading to feelings of alienation and isolation within the marriage.
It becomes challenging to build a foundation of mutual respect and support when one or both partners are unwilling to listen and consider each other's perspectives.
Additionally, whether you're hounding or harassing or just choosing to be difficult, these cycles of wanting to be right can escalate conflicts and disagreements, turning small issues into larger, more contentious battles. This can create a pattern of communication breakdowns and emotional distance, making it difficult for couples to find common ground and work together as a team. Without open and respectful communication, couples may struggle to navigate challenges and differences in a healthy and constructive way, ultimately putting their marriage at risk.
If you want to avoid falling into the trap of being a hound dog, which can be detrimental to your marriage, then you want to step up your game.
The K.I.S.S. ~ Step up your game!
It is essential for couples to practice empathy, active listening, and mutual respect in order to foster a harmonious and supportive relationship built on understanding and cooperation.
1. Consciousness vs. Carelessness
Firstly, consciousness refers to being aware of one's thoughts, feelings, and surroundings, like being self-aware. Individuals can better control their reactions during conflicts by recognizing and understanding their triggers and emotional responses. Who wants to be careless? Your lack of attention, awareness, or concern is not going to win you any brownie points.
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, John Gottman, emphasizes the importance of self-awareness, stating, "Taking responsibility for our own emotional reactions can significantly impact how we navigate disagreements with our partners."
But again, you have to be willing to look at yourself and engage in self-examination. And that consciousness is going to take the energy of a full-time job. So prepare your mind for the hard work ahead.
2. Compassion vs. Callousness
Secondly, cultivating empathy towards their spouse's point of view is crucial. Hello, compassion! Empathy lets you see things from your spouse's perspective, fostering understanding and connection.
Research by psychologist Sara Konrath supports this, highlighting that empathy is essential for building strong and meaningful relationships.
As Kristianne Wargo, a relationship coach, wisely states, "Empathy is the bridge that connects differences in marriage and paves the way for mutual understanding."
And if you want to bat a thousand, then continue your callousness—the lack of compassion, empathy, or sensitivity towards others, which indicates a cold and indifferent attitude that contrasts with the warmth and understanding associated with compassion.
3. Collaborate vs. Compete
Lastly, adopting a collaborative mindset is key. Instead of viewing conflicts as a battle to be won, approaching disagreements as opportunities for growth and compromise can lead to more constructive resolutions.
Marriage researcher Dr. Sue Johnson affirms this approach, emphasizing that collaboration and teamwork are vital for resolving conflicts in a marriage.
Otherwise, you will find yourself keeping score, and then it will be a win-or-lose event every time you come together. Who really wants to play in the Super Bowl every day?
Managing differences and diverse perspectives in marriage requires a proactive and introspective approach. By practicing consciousness (self-awareness), compassion (empathy), and collaboration (better together), you'll be able to navigate conflicts with grace and understanding, strengthening your bond with your spouse.
"Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"
#RelationshipBuilders #CreateYourNow #LoveAndMarriage
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Cover Art by Jenny Hamson
Photo by Canva.com
Music by Mandisa - Overcomer
http://www.mandisaofficial.com
Song ID: 68209
Song Title: Overcomer
Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia
Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI)
One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -
Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.