3902 Create Space for Christmas in the Chaos
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
Between the dinner, dishes, and dogs, how does anyone ever find the time to prepare the family for the true heart of Christmas? Because, like me, I know you are trying to do all the things. But are they the right things? So why not do Christmas differently this year? Create space for Christmas in the chaos. You donāt have to create a Pinterest-perfect Christmas to do that. What matters most is carving out spaceānot just on the calendar, but in your familyās heart and homeāfor the real gift of Christmas. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at...
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3901 Show UpāEven When You're Tired
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
What is it about the weekend looming? The week has worn you down just enough to feel heavy in your bones. The kind of tired that seeps past the surface, whispering, āJust rest. Skip the weekend plans. Stay in bed.ā Lifeās been coming and going all week, and here you areāstill expected to show up. I want to talk about that tiredness. Not to shame it or fix it with a magic pill, but to find honor in it. Because showing upāright where you are, even when youāre tiredāis an act of courage wrapped in quiet grace. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us...
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3900 The Holiday Secret Nobody Tells You
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
Why is it that this time of year, the calendar fills up and your energy disappears? December comes in like a whirlwind, dishes pile up, and suddenly youāre wondering when you signed up to be the worldās busiest elf. Seriously?!? If youāre like most people, your own wellness gets pushed way down on the list just because thereās too much to do. However, ignoring yourself this time of year is the fastest route to burning out before the big day even arrives. But there's the holiday secret nobody tells you. Yet, if youāre anything like most people, you keep pushing harder, giving more,...
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3899 Your Heart is the Anchor
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
The holiday season is notorious for turning you into a checklist machine. You wake up with a mental rundown of what must be done: complete Cyber purchases, groceries, school events, meal prep, work deadlines, holiday gatherings, gift wrapping, and on and on. By the time Tuesday is here, that list is already gnawing at your energy and your spirit. You're already wiped out just thinking about the week ahead. Sound too familiar? Well, here's your escape: Your to-do list does not anchor your lifeāyour heart is the anchor. Psalm 46:10 reminds us to āBe still, and know that I am God.ā...
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3898 Living Life Out of Order
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
December evenings can feel like a pressure cooker. You scroll through Instagram and see everyoneās lives perfectly arranged: big wins, festive decor, smiling faces. Meanwhile, youāre staring down unfinished projects, mounting fatigue, and that nagging voice telling you youāre behind, failing, or simply out of place. Why does it feel like everyone else is moving forward, while youāre stuck living life out of order? Hereās the hard truth: comparison is a silent peace thief. When you measure your messy, nonlinear reality against othersā carefully curated timelines and highlight reels,...
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3897 HOPE - The Faithfulness of God
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
When the future feels shaky and the world seems out of control, hope is often whatās missing. But hereās where you check your pulse: hope is not wishful thinking or vague optimism. Real hope is a confident expectation anchored in the faithfulness of God. Jeremiah 29:11 cuts through the noise: āFor I know the plans I have for you,ā declares the Lord, āplans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.ā Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the . This verse isnāt a hollow promiseāitās a wild, brave...
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3896 Digging for Gold
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
Marriage is no fairy tale without effort. It demands work, dedication, and a clear purpose to turn the ordinary into an extraordinary journey. When that effort wanes, couples find themselves facing the big āDāādivorce. No one wants that outcome. Yet, many walk down the aisle with hope for forever, only to get distracted by the temptation of greener grass elsewhere. But the problem is that they're digging for gold in the wrong places. Picture this: Itās Black Friday, and everyoneās scouring the stores, hunting for the best deals, the quickest wins, the most immediate gratification....
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3895 Raising Kids with Kind Hearts
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
Raising kids with kind hearts filled with gratitude feels like an uphill battle these days. Itās no secret that screens dominate their attentionāheads buried in phones and tablets, tuning out the world around them. But it doesn't have to be this way. If we let kids do what they want with technology, many will struggle to grasp what it really means to be kind, respectful, and thankful. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the . And hereās the tougher truth: parents arenāt always present either, caught up in their own whirlwind. If both sides...
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3894 The Letter of Thanksgiving
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
Thanksgiving often nudges us to list the people we appreciateāthe family, friends, mentors, colleagues. But this year, letās flip the script. Before you reach out to thank another, consider turning your gratitude inward. What if today, the letter of thanksgiving you write is to yourself? Think about your yearānot just the surface moments you flash back to, but the quiet stretches, the small triumphs, the unseen acts of kindness you offered without fanfare. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the . Where has your heart been whole? What parts of...
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3893 Gratitude Creates a Vision for Tomorrow
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denials into acceptance chaos into order, confusion into clarity. It makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow. ~ Melody Beattie Gratitude isnāt just about saying āthank you.ā Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the . Thereās a subtle but powerful difference between being thankful and being grateful. Thankfulness happens in the mind ā itās the polite acknowledgment of something received. Think about the...
info_outlineIn the dance of marriage, the spotlight often shines brighter on one partner while the other fades into the shadows. Do you feel like your light shines bright for the one closest to you; do you feel seen?
For those who feel unseen in their marriage, the repercussions can be profound, touching on issues of self-worth, communication breakdowns, and a sense of loneliness within the union.
Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at Women of IMPACT. https://createyournow.mn.co
Relationship experts emphasize the importance of feeling validated and acknowledged within the context of a partnership. Dr. John Gottman, renowned for his work on marital stability and divorce prediction, notes that "Feeling understood and appreciated are key components of a healthy relationship."
When one partner feels unseen, it can lead to a breakdown in these essential elements, creating a rift that deepens over time.
Psychotherapist Esther Perel underscores the impact of feeling unnoticed, stating, "In marriage, one often feels like they are cruising through the motions, silently screaming for attention and connection."
This silent plea for recognition can manifest in various ways, from emotional distancing to engaging in behaviors that seek validation outside the relationship.
The consequences of feeling unseen in a marriage are far-reaching. Lack of validation can erode self-esteem, leading to feelings of inadequacy and unworthiness. Communication breakdowns often follow suit, as the unheard partner may withdraw or become resentful, further widening the gap between them. Over time, the emotional disconnection can culminate in a sense of loneliness, even within the confines of a committed relationship.
"In marriage, the invisible wounds of feeling unseen can leave lasting scars on the heart, dimming even the brightest of love's light." - Kristianne Wargo
What can be done if you are the one who feels unseen?
The K.I.S.S. ~ Shine a light on what isn't seen!
Whatever stays in the dark will be unresolved in the shadows of your every day. At some point, you have to be willing to shine a light on what isn't seen.
1. Initiate Open and Honest Communication: Expressing your feelings of being unseen to your partner is the first step towards resolving the issue. Schedule a time to have a calm, open conversation about how you've been feeling and what you need from them to feel more acknowledged in the relationship. And if you are not heard, you have bigger problems.
2. Seek Couples Therapy: Sometimes, having a neutral third party guide your discussions can be incredibly beneficial. Consider seeking couples therapy to explore deeper-rooted issues, improve communication, and learn strategies to ensure both partners feel seen and heard within the marriage.
3. Focus on Self-Care and Individual Growth: While working on your relationship dynamics, prioritize self-care and personal development; who you are and who you are becoming. Engage in activities that bring you joy, pursue hobbies that fulfill you, and prioritize your emotional well-being. By investing in yourself, you can cultivate a stronger sense of self-worth and resilience, irrespective of external validation. However, this is not about you fluffing your ego. This is about you becoming a better person regardless of the circumstances you find yourself in.
Building a marriage where both partners feel truly seen requires a conscious effort to listen, validate, and appreciate one another. By acknowledging our partner's presence, celebrating their uniqueness, and fostering open communication, we can cultivate a relationship that thrives on mutual recognition and understanding.
So, take a moment to ask yourself: Do you feel seen in your marriage? And if the answer is no, it may be time to shine a light on the unseen parts of your partnership, illuminating the path towards a deeper, more connected bond.
Remember, a marriage where both partners feel truly seen is a marriage worth fighting for.
"Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"
#RelationshipBuilders #CreateYourNow #LoveAndMarriage
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Cover Art by Jenny Hamson
Photo by Canva.com
Music by Mandisa - Overcomer
http://www.mandisaofficial.com
Song ID: 68209
Song Title: Overcomer
Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia
Copyright Ā© 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI)
One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -
Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.