4161 Make Time Before There's No Time
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
There's a shift that happens every year around this time. You can feel it coming. The backpacks come out. The schedules start stacking. The buses start appearing in droves. And before you know it, the days that once stretched long and slow are suddenly chopped into thirty-minute increments between drop-offs and deadlines. If you're a parent, you know exactly what I'm talking about — all the more reason why you know it matters to make time before there's no time. Once school starts, calendars fill up fast. Between homework, activities, friends, and screens, meaningful conversations can easily...
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4160 Stay Open
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
It can be one of the hardest things we ever do — keeping our hands unclenched when everything in us wants a tighter grip. Staying open when life has taught us that open means vulnerable, and vulnerable means hurt. But here's what I've learned, and what I'm reminded of in every new season: the moment we close ourselves off is the moment we stop becoming who God created us to be. So today, I'm asking you to stay open — open to His leading, open to growth, and open to the beautiful, unexpected things He has waiting on the other side of our yes. We are creatures of self-protection. It's wired...
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4159 The Woman in the Water
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
When was the last time you looked at yourself, really looked and didn't flinch? It's not the quick glance in the rearview mirror to check your lipstick or the passing reflection in a storefront window where you tug at your shirt and keep walking. It's the kind of looking that requires stillness. The kind of seeing that asks you to stay. Because you, my friend, are the woman in the water, and the only reason you can't see her clearly is because you won't stop stirring. We live stirred-up lives. We stir with busyness. We stir with worry. We stir with comparison, scrolling through someone else's...
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4158 Knocked Down But Not Knocked Out
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
Life has a way of catching you off guard. One minute you're standing tall, feeling like you've finally got your footing — and the next, something comes along and sweeps your feet right out from under you. Maybe it's a phone call you weren't expecting. A door that closed when you were sure it was about to open. A season that turned harder than anything you could have prepared for. And there you are. On the ground. Catching your breath. Wondering what just happened. Knocked down but not knocked out. A lot of us have been there more times than we'd like to admit. And if you're one who has that...
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4157 What You Can't Control Doesn't Get the Final Say
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
You already have what you need, right now to create your now. There is no reason to wait for tomorrow, nor when the circumstances shift, or when that one thing finally falls into place. And yet, there's this pull that creeps in and whispers, but what about that thing you can't fix or control? There you are, standing at the edge of a perfectly open door and still looking sideways at the wall beside it, wondering why it won't move. This happens more often than we like to admit. You know what's in front of you. You know the next step. But something uncontrollable grabs your attention, and...
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4156 The Secret of Being Content
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want." ~ Philippians 4:12 Contentment didn't land in Paul's lap like some spiritual gift he unwrapped one morning. It was forged and tested, including shipwrecks, beatings, imprisonment, and hunger. He was refined through every season that could have, and maybe should have, shaken him loose from his faith. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the . ...
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4155 Celebrate Your Spouse
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
When was the last time you actually celebrated your spouse? Not on their birthday or your anniversary. Not some calendar-mandated holiday where Hallmark reminds you it's time to show up. This is a random, ordinary, nothing-special kind of day, when you look at the person doing life beside you and say, "I see you. And I'm grateful." Celebrate your spouse! Now, if you had to think about it, you're not alone. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the . #RelationshipBuilders #CreateYourNow #LoveAndMarriage We love our spouses. Deeply. But a lot of times,...
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4154 Before the Bell Rings
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
There is something about the start of a new school year that carries both excitement and weight. The backpacks are packed, the outfits are picked out, and the alarm is set for a time no one in the house has seen in weeks. But before the bus pulls up, before the shoes are tied and the lunches are grabbed, there is a window of time that belongs to you and your family. And what you do with it matters more than you might think. It's before the bell rings. It's that morning window, the window that doesn't just happen. It is built. And if you are a parent staring down the start of a new school year,...
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4153 One More
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
I know you're tired. I know that thing you've been carrying — that weight you keep picking up every single morning, even though nobody would blame you for setting it down — I know it's heavy. And I know you've told yourself more than once that you're not sure you have another round in you. But here's what I also know: you have one more in you! You're still here. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the . #Inspiration #CreateYourNow #DailyMotivation You're still listening to this. You're still showing up. You're still breathing and fighting and...
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4152 The Woman in the Mirror
Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo
There's a moment — and if you're honest, you know exactly the one I'm talking about — where you catch your reflection and the first thing that crosses your mind isn't kind. It's not always about what you look like physically, although sometimes it is. More often, it's deeper than that. It's the look in your own eyes that says, I thought I'd be further along by now. It's the quiet measuring of the woman in the mirror that happens when you compare who you are today against who you imagined you'd be at this point. And just like that, the woman staring back at you becomes not enough....
info_outlineIn the dance of marriage, the spotlight often shines brighter on one partner while the other fades into the shadows. Do you feel like your light shines bright for the one closest to you; do you feel seen?
For those who feel unseen in their marriage, the repercussions can be profound, touching on issues of self-worth, communication breakdowns, and a sense of loneliness within the union.
Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at Women of IMPACT. https://createyournow.mn.co
Relationship experts emphasize the importance of feeling validated and acknowledged within the context of a partnership. Dr. John Gottman, renowned for his work on marital stability and divorce prediction, notes that "Feeling understood and appreciated are key components of a healthy relationship."
When one partner feels unseen, it can lead to a breakdown in these essential elements, creating a rift that deepens over time.
Psychotherapist Esther Perel underscores the impact of feeling unnoticed, stating, "In marriage, one often feels like they are cruising through the motions, silently screaming for attention and connection."
This silent plea for recognition can manifest in various ways, from emotional distancing to engaging in behaviors that seek validation outside the relationship.
The consequences of feeling unseen in a marriage are far-reaching. Lack of validation can erode self-esteem, leading to feelings of inadequacy and unworthiness. Communication breakdowns often follow suit, as the unheard partner may withdraw or become resentful, further widening the gap between them. Over time, the emotional disconnection can culminate in a sense of loneliness, even within the confines of a committed relationship.
"In marriage, the invisible wounds of feeling unseen can leave lasting scars on the heart, dimming even the brightest of love's light." - Kristianne Wargo
What can be done if you are the one who feels unseen?
The K.I.S.S. ~ Shine a light on what isn't seen!
Whatever stays in the dark will be unresolved in the shadows of your every day. At some point, you have to be willing to shine a light on what isn't seen.
1. Initiate Open and Honest Communication: Expressing your feelings of being unseen to your partner is the first step towards resolving the issue. Schedule a time to have a calm, open conversation about how you've been feeling and what you need from them to feel more acknowledged in the relationship. And if you are not heard, you have bigger problems.
2. Seek Couples Therapy: Sometimes, having a neutral third party guide your discussions can be incredibly beneficial. Consider seeking couples therapy to explore deeper-rooted issues, improve communication, and learn strategies to ensure both partners feel seen and heard within the marriage.
3. Focus on Self-Care and Individual Growth: While working on your relationship dynamics, prioritize self-care and personal development; who you are and who you are becoming. Engage in activities that bring you joy, pursue hobbies that fulfill you, and prioritize your emotional well-being. By investing in yourself, you can cultivate a stronger sense of self-worth and resilience, irrespective of external validation. However, this is not about you fluffing your ego. This is about you becoming a better person regardless of the circumstances you find yourself in.
Building a marriage where both partners feel truly seen requires a conscious effort to listen, validate, and appreciate one another. By acknowledging our partner's presence, celebrating their uniqueness, and fostering open communication, we can cultivate a relationship that thrives on mutual recognition and understanding.
So, take a moment to ask yourself: Do you feel seen in your marriage? And if the answer is no, it may be time to shine a light on the unseen parts of your partnership, illuminating the path towards a deeper, more connected bond.
Remember, a marriage where both partners feel truly seen is a marriage worth fighting for.
"Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"
#RelationshipBuilders #CreateYourNow #LoveAndMarriage
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Cover Art by Jenny Hamson
Photo by Canva.com
Music by Mandisa - Overcomer
http://www.mandisaofficial.com
Song ID: 68209
Song Title: Overcomer
Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia
Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI)
One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -
Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.