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Ep. 172: Living After Your Child's Life Ends - Margo Fowkes

Grief Out Loud

Release Date: 11/20/2020

Grief & Money: (Re)Building A Life's Purpose - Robert Pardi show art Grief & Money: (Re)Building A Life's Purpose - Robert Pardi

Grief Out Loud

This is the first episode in our three-part Grief & Money series. We don't get through life without grief. We also can't get through life without dealing with money. For Robert Pardi, when his wife Desiree died of cancer, he was umoored. He was also left with significant medical bills. He returned to his career in finance just long enough to pay off the debt before radically changing his life. He packed a bag, moved to Italy, and started a new career as a life coach and author.

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Titrating Grief show art Titrating Grief

Grief Out Loud

When Jonna's mom, Anita, died just a few days after Jonna's 26th birthday, she prepared herself to completely fall apart. She imagined not getting out of bed for days, never laughing again, and for life to come to a standstill. When grief didn't look like that, it was confusing and left her worried she was doing something wrong. Jonna talks about her mom, their relationship, what it's like for grief to show up over time, and reckoning with how grief is changing her hopes and goals.

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Grief Wanted My Attention - Nnenna Freelon show art Grief Wanted My Attention - Nnenna Freelon

Grief Out Loud

Nnenna Freelon's beloved husband Phil died in July of 2019. Six months later her sister, Dr. Debbie Pierce, also died. Then, COVID hit the United States. During this dark winter, Nnenna was exhausted, but she also couldn't rest. She tried everything and nothing worked. Eventually, she realized she needed to listen. To listen to what grief had to say. In the listening she found her voice. With that voice, Nnenna recently released her latest album, Time Traveler, and started a podcast, Great Grief. 

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End Of Life Care With A Death Doula - Oceana Sawyer show art End Of Life Care With A Death Doula - Oceana Sawyer

Grief Out Loud

Oceana Saywer is a death doula who supports people at the end of life. She came to this work through being with her father during his last days. An experience she describes as transformative and revelatory. In our conversation we travel from Oceana's earliest exposure to grief when she was a young child to more recent losses, personal and communal, over the past 18 months of the pandemic. 

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When Your Pillar Parent Dies - Grief As A Young Adult With Monday Mourning show art When Your Pillar Parent Dies - Grief As A Young Adult With Monday Mourning

Grief Out Loud

It's our 200th episode! To celebrate we talked with Harry, Gabby, and Madison, the crew behind the Monday Mourning Podcast and the Dead Parents Club. Gabby and Madison's mom died of cancer in 2016 and Harry's father died, also of cancer, the next year. As friends and members of the Dead Parents Club, the three of them talk openly and irreverently about grief in a way that makes it more comfortable for others to talk about something no one really knows how to talk about. 

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Living Brave In Grief - Shannon Dingle show art Living Brave In Grief - Shannon Dingle

Grief Out Loud

This is a love story. And, because it's on this podcast, it's also a grief story. Shannon and Lee Dingle met when they were 18. As Shannon describes it, their relationship was the kind she would roll her eyes at if she wasn't living it. In July, 2019, they were on vacation at the beach when a wave hit Lee just the wrong way and he died. We talk about how Shannon and her kids are making their way in this new world without Lee, with lots of honesty, dark humor, and permission to feel every and anything. 

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Interviewing Grief - Caitlin Garvey & The Mourning Report show art Interviewing Grief - Caitlin Garvey & The Mourning Report

Grief Out Loud

Caitlin Garvey's mother died in June of 2008, the summer after Caitlin's freshman year of college. Many years later, Caitlin decided to interview a series of people closely tied to her mother's illness and end of life. Those interviews, interspersed with Caitlin's memories and reflections, were recently published as The Mourning Report.

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Grief Doesn't Stop When You Clock In - Supporting Employees In Grief show art Grief Doesn't Stop When You Clock In - Supporting Employees In Grief

Grief Out Loud

Leslie Barber is back for another episode! When Leslie's husband Steve died of cancer, she had a lot to figure out. How to live without the love of her life, how to raise their daughter on her own, and how to manage working while grieving. Leslie's company, Grief Warrior, trains business leaders, managers, and human resource departments to become more grief inclusive.

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Anger & Grief  show art Anger & Grief

Grief Out Loud

Keyana was 9 when her dad died. He died of suicide, but at the time her mom just told her he was gone. Eventually Keyana learned the truth and wrestled with all the emotions that come with having a parent die - confusion, overwhelm, sadness, and most of all for Keyana - anger. Anger at her dad, her mom, and the circumstances. As an adult, Keyana realized she needed to learn more about this anger and find ways to express it that didn't cause harm to herself and her relationships. 

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When Grief Goes To Camp - Brie Overton show art When Grief Goes To Camp - Brie Overton

Grief Out Loud

Grief might not be the first thing you think of when it comes to summer camp, but there are thousands of children and teens who take their grief with them as they get to know bunkmates, play soccer, and make crafts. We talk with Brie Overton, Chief Clinical Officer for Experience Camps, about how she and her staff work to create connection and understanding for the children and teens who attend their camps across the country.

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More Episodes

How do you go on living after your child's life ends? How do you continue to find connection, beauty, and meaning when someone we can't imagine living without dies? This is the question Margo Fowkes faced when her son Jimmy died of brain cancer at the age of 21. Margo barely had a moment to grapple with this devastating loss when just a year later, her mother also died. This led Margo to search for information and connection with others who were also grieving. When she couldn't find what she was looking for, she decided to create it. Her website, Salt Water, is a collection of writings, by Margo and others, about how people are continuing to engage in life after losing the people they love most. 

We talk about:

  • Parenting when your child is living with an illness
  • Grieving together and apart with a spouse/partner
  • The power of writing
  • Answering "How many children do you have?"
  • What's helping Margo during this time
  • How she hopes the world will remember Jimmy

Visit Salt Water and connect with Margo on Facebook (@findyourharbor) & Instagram (@findyourharbor)