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Let's Talk About...Restriction

The Emotional Eating (and Everything Else) Podcast

Release Date: 06/25/2024

The Power of IFS:  Kali and Amanda's Stories show art The Power of IFS: Kali and Amanda's Stories

The Emotional Eating (and Everything Else) Podcast

It's episode 100 of the Emotional Eating (and Everything Else) Podcast--I can't even believe it!  And to celebrate, I thought I'd invite two amazing women who I've had the honor of working with come into the show and share their experience with IFS.   Kali and Amanda are two former clients who graciously agreed to talk about their struggles with food and their bodies and how IFS and Intuitive Eating have helped them to heal.  They have very different histories and backgrounds, different body types, and different experiences, and I have no doubt that you will...

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I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that at some point in your life, you've tried to change what you're eating.  Perhaps because you started a diet.  Or you were trying to "eat healthier."  Or maybe you were trying to move toward a more Self-led or Intuitive Eating approach to food (where you're really tuning into your body and feeding your body in ways that work well for it). Regardless of why you were trying to change what you were eating, it probably wasn't all that easy.  There may have been foods that you tried to cut out but...

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On the last podcast, we talked about "blocking parts." And by blocking, I meant parts that tend to come up when you’re trying to get to know another part. Like when you’re headed for the kitchen and a part of you says, "I should get to know the part that’s leading me to the kitchen right now" but another part comes up and says, "Nope!  I don’t want to get to know that part. I’ll do it next time."  I hope that the episode was helpful and that you noticed more of those parts over the past couple of weeks. This week, I thought it would be helpful to focus on another...

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Let me ask you this:  have you ever noticed yourself heading for the kitchen to get some food, knowing you aren't hungry, and when you start to check in with the part who's leading you there, you hear something like, "Oh don't do that crazy IFS stuff--just eat the food."  Or, "Ugh--who cares why we're heading to food--just eat it!"  Or even, "Life is so stressful right now--just eat!  We deserve it!" These are parts that I call "blocking parts."  They jump in and block us from getting curious about the parts of us that lead us to food.  And I think sometimes we...

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Here we are, in the middle of the holiday season, and I thought it might be helpful to go back to the basics of the Emotional Eating (and Everything Else) Podcast and talk about, you guessed it, emotional eating.  Yep, it's been 94 episodes since we've focused on this topic.  Well, that's not exactly true.  We've focused on specific aspects of emotional eating, but we haven't discussed it in broad terms like we did in the second episode of this podcast. And I don't know about you, but I know my emotional eating parts have been more active lately.  Due to the...

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This week's episode features , who's a bit of an IFS rockstar.  Jeanne has been one of the strongest voices in the IFS community in regard to food and body concerns, and I'm so thrilled to have her on the podcast! Just a little about her:  Jeanne is a clinical psychologist who has specialized in the treatment of disordered eating and trauma for over twenty-five years. She trained in psychodynamic psychotherapy, Somatic Experiencing®, and eye movement-desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) before discovering the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model. Jeanne is known for...

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Well, it's fall here in New England, which means cooler weather, absolutely beautiful trees, and apple cider!  (And for those of you who love it, pumpkin spice!)  It also means lots and lots of raking is in my future!   And it also means sweater weather!!!!  Yay!!!  So many of my parts love sweater weather.  Throwing on a big cable-knit sweater just feels so cozy.  And I just love fall colors (especially forest green--I can't tell you how many forest green sweaters I have). But do you know another reason why some of my...

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On today's episode, I'm so excited to be joined by Amy Pershing to talk about Binge Eating Disorder (BED).  Amy is essentially THE expert on treating BED with IFS, and I'm so thankful that she's sharing her wisdom with us!  We've been trying for months to record an episode, and we finally did it! Just a little about her, Amy Pershing, LMSW, ACSW, CCTP-II, is the Founding Director of Bodywise, the first BED-specific treatment program in the United States, and President of the Board of the Center for Eating Disorders in Ann Arbor, Michigan.  She is the founder of...

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If you're someone who's done your own IFS work, you were likely encouraged to check in with a part that you met during your session on your own regularly throughout the week.  And you may have thought, how in the world do I do that?  Hopefully, the therapist or coach you're working with helped you with that process.  But if they didn't, you're in luck!  It's the topic of this week's podcast! While checking in with parts that you meet during session is incredibly important, so is checking in with parts in general.  And one of the things that I've been focusing on...

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On this week's podcast episode we're talking about anxiety, one of the most common things that lead our parts to food.  Very often, parts in our system use food to calm our anxious parts.  I think this happens for a couple of reasons.  First, food can be a great distraction when we're feeling anxious.  And second, food actually calms us down.  Research has shown that food (especially carbs) elevates serotonin levels, which can decrease depression and anxiety. So if you're someone who tends to eat when you're anxious, there's a reason for that.  It...

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More Episodes

On this weeks' podcast episode, we're talking about restriction. This is a topic that I know I've mentioned a number of times on the show, but I've never talked about it in depth. And given how common it is, it's about time that I do.

What comes to mind when you think about the word "restriction" (as it relates to food)?  For me, I tend to think about the diagnosis of anorexia.  I picture someone who's not eating nearly enough to sustain their body.  Someone who has parts that are terrified of eating or of weight gain.  Someone who's body is breaking down due to a lack of nourishment.  You might picture the same.

But I think that's a very narrow idea of what restriction often looks like.  

While certainly there are folx who are engaging in that level of restriction (research shows that up to 4% of women and up to .3% of men are diagnosed with anorexia at some point in their lifetime), many, many people restrict their food intake to a lesser degree.  And I think many of those people don't really even realize that how they're eating would be considered restrictive.   

For example, dieting is actually restriction.  So is not eating certain foods or limiting how much of those foods you're eating.  Restriction is also believing that you need to earn food with exercise.  Or counting out exactly 19 grapes (or whatever the "correct" serving size of grapes might be) regardless of how hungry you are.  And there are probably dozens upon dozens of other examples of restriction that we don't typically think of as restriction.

At this point, you may be thinking, "Hey--I do some of those things--so what?  That's normal."  Well, you're right--it is normal in our culture to engage in restrictive eating behaviors.  But should it be?  

To me, restrictive eating behaviors aren't Self-led.  And in my humble opinion, being Self-led with food as what we're aiming for.  I truly believe that our Self wants our body to be nourished and healthy.  And I don't believe that Self supports restricting.  Which means that restriction comes from our parts.

Let me say that again:  restrictive eating comes from our parts.

And on this week's episode, we talk about the four most common reasons that our parts restrict food:

  • Restriction is seen as "normal" and desirable in our culture
  • To lose weight, maintain weight, or prevent weight gain
  • As a means of controlling the chaos in one's life
  • To feel special

We also talk about what restriction is (i.e. it's not just anorexia), what it can look like, and how our protectors use restriction to protect exiles.  Quick example:  say you have an exile who carries body shame from being told that your body is too large.  This exile may be protected by a part who works really hard at trying to lose weight, thinking that if your body is just smaller that exile would no longer feel shame.

If you know you have parts that restrict food (or are now curious about whether or not you do), take a listen to this week's episode.  My hope is that you'll have a much better understanding of--and appreciation for--these restricting parts.  Take a listen!

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