Permission to Stop Faking It with Tash Haynes

Are you overwhelmed by trying to do it all?

Tash Haynes joins me on the podcast today to speak honestly about motherhood, entrepreneurship, and creativity. This multi passionate creative is crushing it in so many areas, but she’s also all about ditching the belief that we can do everything.

Maybe business success doesn’t mean always niching down, but being a full human.
Maybe we can do way more than we give ourselves credit for, yet also be willing to prioritize and drop what isn’t working.

You’re going to be encouraged and liberated by the wisdom that Tash shares! She spills her productivity process and secrets and gives us the friendship we need in 2020.

Here's what we covered.

How I connected with Tash on a motherhood panel for Conference and Chill. We also cover how she got started making a business with her husband. (2:00)
Tash shares about the importance of being honest in motherhood. “We always feel as mothers that there’s this secret club where people have it all together and we’ve missed the training course for it, but I feel like people don’t have it together. Even the most together people don’t have it together… I wish we were more honest about that.”

Before picking up a camera, Ike was working for Comcast and Tash was working in youth programming for a nonprofit. Starting out, it was Tash’s thing and Ike was just supportive. At first, she wanted to keep it as her own thing. They were competitive at first at shoots and had to learn how to respect and honor each other as partners. It was a spiritual decision for Tash to make room for Ike in the business and grow together. “It’s really highlighted our strengths and allowed us to shine… we allow the other to lead where it makes sense.”

Her advice to those who feel pressure to figure out niche or who are multi passionate is, “Just do it and don’t follow the unspoken rules that don’t exist in this industry. Just do what you want to do and thrive.”

The Goal of Tash’s Personal Blog Wisdom + Courage. (15:30)
Tash wanted to bring our her strengths that weren’t just photography and be able to separate them. She wanted this thing to live on it’s own and be its own brand. “I am so much more than a photographer.” We talked about feeling pigeonholed instead of being full people.

She wanted to share her life experience and wisdom, but also give her kids a space to see this season of life. Blogging is her way of preserving the memories and lessons from life. But she finds that anyone can relate to the elements – motherhood, travel, faith, etc.

Chasing dreams as a family and finding work-life balance. Plus virtual schooling. (21:15)
Tash writes anything important on a post it note – from now to do lists to dreams and goals for the future. “When I think about goals and dreams and how we get it done, really it’s grace.”

Her advice is:
Do the hard stuff first. Even if there’s no time for the fun stuff, we’ll find a way to get it done.
Outsourcing comes after maximizing your time and really focusing.
Done is better than perfect.

Tash’s routines, rituals, and processes for productivity. (27:00)
Google calendars for meals, Ike and Tash business stuff, and a calendar for personal influencing stuff, and one for the kids. It’s all color coded and it sends her reminders every three days, plus a daily email that gives a heads up for everything happening that day. She then prioritizes based on importance.

“Importance to me is what’s going to give me more time or what’s bringing in money.” She’s been facing sickness, so she’s really had to focus on those high priority tasks.

She also recommend brain dumping and just getting the things in your head out on a piece of paper. Then finding things that go together and lumping them together. If it’s content ideas, she’ll color code them on sticky notes and put it on the wall. (Ideas from Maddie James) That helps her remember and not have to look back in her phone.

I share my hack with using the notes app and syncing between my phone and computer. It’s so handy getting to switch between both!

Why women can’t “do it all” and how it creates an unrealistic standard. She shares changes she’s made to find a better mindset in motherhood. (36:45)
“I don’t subscribe to mom guilt at all. I can’t be mom-guilted or made to feel bad.” We’re all doing our best to make it and survive. She doesn’t let other people’s standards and ideas run her life. Everyone’s situations, trauma, goals, etc is different! Through sickness and a near death experience, it gave her perspective of not having the time to feel guilty or not enough. “Am I always getting it right? Absolutely not… but I bring more joy to their lives and value to their lives than I take away from it and that’s where I choose to put my focus.”

We put way more pressure on ourselves than our kids put on us. “Parenting her through the lens of my trauma and hurt is not fair to her.” Tash felt liberated to show up in the moment and react appropriate to the situation. Being honest about our emotions and why we are the way we are is so important.

“I’m for the underdog and believe so much in justice in every way.” She shares about how everyone should have opportunity to grow.

Outsourcing and CHOOSING to afford help. Plus knowing the right timing to take on new projects or set aside old ones. (49:00)
Tash shares about the former senior of hers who they’ve hired to do work for her seniors and all the planning for their shoots as well as social media. It’s been such a good fit to be able to partner together to make it work for both of them. She’s getting to train up women in their early twenties to be entrepreneurial and help them in their journey.

She shares the difference between good and right – specifically about the conference she used to run. She debated bringing it back in 2020, but her gut said it wasn’t the right timing and with 2020, virtual school, another pregnancy and everything else, it was such a good call to not go for it. “You’ve got to trust your instinct about things.”