Libsyn Directory

436: Are You the Drama?

Release Date: 04/09/2025

452: Summer Series - Untriggered: How to Protect Your Peace in Any Situation

School of Self-Image

Becoming Untriggerable: A Journey to Emotional Freedom A trigger is defined as an external or internal event that evokes a strong emotional response, often negative, such as anger, sadness, or anxiety. Tonya Leigh shares her personal experience of being triggered during her father's celebration of life, where she felt intense anger due to a perceived boundary violation. This moment of rage was not just an isolated incident; it reflected deeper feelings and unresolved issues within her. Tonya encourages listeners to view triggers as invitations to look within themselves. Instead of reacting...

451: Summer Series - Shop My Thought Closet

School of Self-Image

The Thought Closet: Discovering the Power of Intentional Thinking Just like a wardrobe, we have a "thought wardrobe" filled with thoughts we wear daily. It's essential to evaluate whether these thoughts serve us well or need to be replaced. We choose outfits that reflect our style and personality, we also curate thoughts that impact how we perceive ourselves. These thoughts can be seen as the mental attire we don each day; some may fit us perfectly, while others may feel outdated or ill-fitting. Host Tonya Leigh encourages listeners to evaluate these thoughts and ask themselves if they...

450: Summer Series - How to Use Style to Reinvent Yourself

School of Self-Image

The Art of Becoming: How Fashion Choices Reflect Your Inner Journey Style transcends mere clothing; it serves as a powerful instrument for self-reinvention, profoundly influencing both our self-perception and how we present ourselves to the world. In a recent podcast episode, Tonya Leigh explores the deep connection between style and identity, emphasizing that every style choice we make conveys a message about who we believe ourselves to be. She shares her personal journey with style, emphasizing its role in self-expression and mood enhancement. Tonya encourages listeners who may feel stuck or...

449: Summer Series - How to Have a Love Affair with Yourself

School of Self-Image

The Most Important Relationship: Loving Yourself First The most crucial relationship in your life is the one you have with yourself. This relationship is foundational because you are with yourself every moment of every day. If this relationship is not nurtured and solid, it can lead to a life filled with unnecessary struggles and hardships. Tonya Leigh reflects on the importance of self-love and the pivotal relationship we have with ourselves. Following the recent loss of her father, who embodied love and encouraged her to love others, Tonya shares her realization that she often withheld...

448: Summer Series - Even Elegant Women Get Pissed Off

School of Self-Image

The Power of Ease, Beauty, and Authenticity Welcome to our first ever Summer Series podcast episode. We are revisiting some powerful past episodes, starting with Tonya Leigh's very first podcast she ever recorded. In the journey of personal development, one of the most significant lessons is that powerful women do not wait for clarity to magically appear; instead, they actively create it through intentional decisions. This proactive approach is essential for anyone seeking to lead a fulfilling and empowered life. Tonya explores the theme of decision-making and the...

447: Why I’m Pressing Pause (and You Might Want To, Too)

School of Self-Image

Reimagining Your Self-Image: The Importance of Taking a Step Back In our fast-paced world, the concept of taking a pause is often misconstrued as a sign of weakness or procrastination. However, pressing pause can be a powerful tool for realignment and rejuvenation. Taking a break can lead to introspection and new inspiration, rather than signaling defeat. Tonya Leigh explores the importance of taking a pause to realign and reinvigorate oneself. Tonya shares her personal journey from a state of misalignment to feeling inspired and expansive about the future. She emphasizes the significance...

446: How to Make Powerful Decisions

School of Self-Image

Decisions That Empower: Creating Clarity in Your Life Indecision is a common struggle that many people face, often leading to feelings of frustration and stagnation. Tonya Leigh emphasizes that indecision drains your power and creates paralysis in your life. When you find yourself stuck in a cycle of overthinking and uncertainty, it can feel as though you are spinning in circles, unable to move forward. This state of indecision not only saps your energy but also prevents you from generating the momentum necessary for growth and progress. She shares her recent experiences of making bold...

445: How to Create Your Comeback Story

School of Self-Image

The Change Cycle: How to Bounce Back Better Than Ever Setbacks are an inevitable part of life. While they can feel overwhelming, they also present unique opportunities for growth and transformation. Embracing the emotions that accompany these challenges is crucial for moving forward effectively. Host Tonya Leigh shares insights from her recent quarterly retreat with her leadership team. She emphasizes the importance of regular check-ins to maintain momentum and accountability in both personal and professional growth. Tonya discusses the inevitable setbacks we face in life and how they...

444: How to Make the Next Six Months Your Best Yet

School of Self-Image

Mid-Year Reset: Strategies to Transform Your Life in Six Months To create your best six months ever, it is essential to start by defining what "best" means for you personally. This involves taking the time to reflect on your desires, aspirations, and what success looks like in your life. Tonya Leigh emphasizes that many people fail to define success clearly, which can lead to feelings of dissatisfaction and confusion. By asking yourself, "If I woke up six months from now and said this was my best season yet, what would have made it so?" you can gain clarity on the specific outcomes and...

443: 5 Little Details That Have Upleveled My Health & Well-Being

School of Self-Image

Little Details, Big Impact: How Small Changes Can Transform Your Life Establishing a morning routine that incorporates intentional practices, such as breath work and connecting with nature, can significantly enhance your day and help you break free from habitual patterns. In a recent podcast episode, the host shares her personal journey of transforming her mornings to create a more intentional and fulfilling start to the day. Host, Tonya Leigh, shares her experience of breaking free from habitual comfort by replacing a reactive coffee routine with a rejuvenating "sunrise ceremony." This...

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The Drama Triangle Explained: How to Reclaim Your Power

The Drama Triangle, a concept developed by psychologist Stephen Karpman, illustrates how individuals can become entangled in a cycle of emotional exhaustion and conflict through three distinct roles: the victim, the rescuer, and the villain. Each role plays a significant part in perpetuating drama in our lives, often without our conscious awareness.

Host Tonya Leigh explores the concept of the Drama Triangle, a framework that reveals the subconscious patterns we create in our lives. The discussion highlights how many people gravitate towards drama, whether for a sense of identity, adrenaline, or connection, often without realizing it. Tonya emphasizes that while some drama may serve a purpose, much of it keeps us trapped in familiar, chaotic states, preventing us from experiencing peace and ease in our lives.

Tune in as we break down the three roles in the Drama Triangle—victim, villain, and hero—and how to recognize and escape these patterns to achieve a more elegant and fulfilling life.

00:47 - The Allure of Drama: Why We Create It

01:03 - Craving Peace and Elegance

02:09 - Role 1: The Victim

04:16 - The Victim's Self-Image

07:10 - Role 2: The Rescuer

09:50 - Examples of the Rescuer Role

11:07 - The Rescuer's Self-Image

16:00 - Role 3: The Villain

19:30 - Examples of the Villain Role

22:26 - The Villain's Self-Image

23:32 - Stepping Out of the Drama Triangle

24:03 - Becoming the Main Character

Quotes:

"What we crave is a sense of ease, a sense of peace, a sense of elegance in our lives, which means that we're going to have to give up some of the drama."

"You're not the problem, but you are the solution."

"If you want to grow your impact, if you want to have more ease in your life, you must be willing to let other people fail."

"I'm only valuable when I'm needed."

"The control, the criticism, and the blame comes from a fear of losing control, of not being enough, of being exposed."

"You're the main character, but more importantly, you're also the writer and the director."

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