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How many people have you had sex with?

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Release Date: 07/02/2020

Road Trips and Sex Without Shame show art Road Trips and Sex Without Shame

Good Girls Talk About Sex

In this Pop Culture Pillow Talk, I talk with pop culture critic Kristen Meinzer about two great movies: Joy Ride Plan B You can find Kristen at:   Become a client: Support the show: Full show notes: 

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Bonus quickie show art Bonus quickie

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Plan B -  Joy Ride -    Become a client: Apply for a free coaching session:   Support the show:

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Find the red flags! - Coaching Sophilia show art Find the red flags! - Coaching Sophilia

Good Girls Talk About Sex

In this coaching episode, Sophilia asks: why does she keep ending up in relationships where things don’t feel right, and the entire weight of making it better falls on her? Leah works with Sophilia to: understand the red flags for this type of relationship, the communication skills that will help screen them out, rethink her own experience of being turned on. Sophilia is a 39-year-old, cisgender woman. She describes herself as queer, single, and multi-racial with a white mother and Black father. In the past she’s been in monogamous relationships, but currently prefers the idea of being...

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When the man teaching consent is the one violating you show art When the man teaching consent is the one violating you

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Last year I found myself in the middle of a shitstorm for daring to expose a community leader's abusive behavior. Today I tell the whole story. The backlash was immediate and intense, with DARVO (Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender) tactics used to paint me as the problem. Suddenly, I was not just standing as a representative of this man’s abuse, but also receiving harassment and ostracization from those I once considered my community. Sharing this story isn't just about telling you what’s going on; it's about shining a light on the dark corners of abuse and systemic failure....

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Pop Culture Pillow Talk: Starstruck on HBO show art Pop Culture Pillow Talk: Starstruck on HBO

Good Girls Talk About Sex

What happens when your brain is so busy it can't slow down to enjoy having sexy time with the cute guy who's totally into you?  In today's episode, we break down the first two episodes of the HBO show Starstruck with teen sex and relationship educator Julia Sheldon (who also happens to be Leah's dear friend.) We focus on lead character Jessie and how overthinking gets in the way of being present. Upcoming Beyond Permission class schedule: Thursday, Feb. 22 - Embracing your inner MILF with Danielle Tuesday, Feb. 27 - Dating at midlife with Leah Tuesday, March 5 - Sex toys show & tell...

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Having the best sex of my life at 63 - Debbie show art Having the best sex of my life at 63 - Debbie

Good Girls Talk About Sex

In this coaching/storytelling episode, Debbie talks about having the best sex of her life at age 63. Her question: Is that usual? While Debbie has always been multi-orgasmic, now she's having dozens of orgasms in a single sex session. And the connection with her new husband is a big part of the reason. Debbie is a 63 year old cisgender woman. She describes herself as white, heterosexual, monogamous, married. She describes her body as slender and athletic. And don't forget: the BEYOND PERMISSION workshop starts next week! Use coupon code "beyond20" to join us!   BEYOND PERMISSION workshop...

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Why don't you want to have sex with me? show art Why don't you want to have sex with me?

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Togetherness is an HBO show that explores the challenges of maintaining a healthy and active sex life in a long-term relationship with small children. In today's episode, Danielle Silverstein from the popular Marriage and Martinis podcast joins Leah to discuss the first two episodes of the show. They dive into the complexities of sexual fulfillment, gender roles, expectations and resentments. Join us for a deep, thought-provoking, and insightful conversation about challenges of maintaining intimacy in a long-term relationship.   BEYOND PERMISSION workshop (use code "beyond20" for $20 off...

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Navigating the sex talk demons show art Navigating the sex talk demons

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Leah joins Danielle of Marriage & Martinis to talk about why Danielle's conversation with her husband  about intimacy and pleasure was explosive and chaotic. Leah breaks down what we need to remember during these very tough conversations: we’ve been conditioned differently from the time we’re very young, and are often simply adhering to the roles we’ve been instructed to fulfill. They talk about why we can’t always trust our bodies’ physical responses during intimacy, games that can be played in lieu of telling our partner, “we’re not satisfied” as means to get a...

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I wish they would SLOW DOWN - Coaching Maria show art I wish they would SLOW DOWN - Coaching Maria

Good Girls Talk About Sex

In this coaching episode, Maria asks the age old question: why is it so hard to ask for what I want?! She's convinced that her problem is in poor communication skills, but it doesn't take long to discover that the issue lies in a complete different area. Leah works with Maria to: understand how gender dynamics are creating friction in the "what do you want?" conversation, rethink how her definition of "sex" makes asking so difficult, practice the way she'd like to initiate a conversation about sex with potential partners. Maria is a 27-year-old cisgender woman. She describes herself as...

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Leah faces an identity crisis show art Leah faces an identity crisis

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Leah delves into a deeply personal topic: how trauma and mental health have impacted her ability to show up authentically. She talks about the impact her demanding, charismatic father had on her psyche and sense of safety. In admitting her fear of being viewed as not good enough or too much like their father, Leah discusses the creation of a performative persona and the desire to shift to a more authentic voice.    Who Is Your Sex & Relationship Alter Ego? Work with Leah: Apply for a free coaching session: Support the show: Full show notes: 

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More Episodes

Leah has asked many of her interviewees how many sexual partners they’ve had. The answers, in their surprisingly wide variety, show that there is no “normal.” This also opens up a discussion about what “counts” as sex.

Here’s a Thought: Your sexual desires don’t always overlap with your romantic relationship preferences. You can be attracted to and visually stimulated by both men and women, but maybe you only want to engage in long-term committed partnerships with men—or vice versa.

 

Bookmarks for this episode:

  • 6:38 – Chorus of voices answering “How many people have you had sex with?”
  • 10:33 - Leah gives her “number” and discusses what “sex” means.
  • 16:00 - “Am I Normal?” This week’s caller asks if being attracted to women means her heterosexual marriage is over.
  • 21:55 - When *not* to ask your husband for a threesome.
  • 23:40 - Our sexual desires and our relationship styles don’t always match up.

 

"Pimp That Pod" recommendation:

The Change Over by Alanna Sparrow

Highlighted episode - White Privilege v. Black Punishment

 

Resources mentioned:

  • Literotica is an online collection of user-submitted erotic fiction and fantasy. You can find stories of all types at https://www.literotica.com/stories/.  For stories specifically about lesbian sex, go to https://www.literotica.com/c/lesbian-sex-stories.  You can search for any other topic that might be of interest at https://tags.literotica.com/.  Please be aware that many pages will have sexy pictures and/or ads for porn sites.  You do not need to click on any of these to use the site.
  • Feminist porn – Watching explicit sexual acts can help you understand what turns you on, however most of the available porn is focused on male satisfaction and neglects the woman’s pleasure. Feminist porn directors create explicit material in a way that’s not objectifying or degrading to women. The following are a selection of directors and websites. PLEASE PAY FOR YOUR PORN!

 

Book a PJ Party!!!  All the info and registrations are at www.leahcarey.com/pjparty

FACEBOOK GROUP: www.facebook.com/groups/goodgirlstalk

AM I NORMAL?: Leave a message for Leah at 720-GOOD-SEX (720-466-3739)

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RATE THIS POD: Leave a rating and review at www.ratethispodcast.com/goodgirls

BE A GUEST: Want to be on the show? Visit www.leahcarey.com/guest

COACHING: Want to talk with Leah directly? Visit www.leahcarey.com/coaching

Host – Leah Carey (website, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, email)

Music – Nazar Rybak