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Improve your sex life with the STARS talk

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Release Date: 01/14/2021

I think I had a crush on a woman - Coaching Caitlin show art I think I had a crush on a woman - Coaching Caitlin

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Leah shares a coaching session with client Caitlin to give us an in-depth experience of what coaching looks and feels like. They focus on Caitlin’s newly-discovered attraction to women.

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I thought my vagina was broken - Stephanie show art I thought my vagina was broken - Stephanie

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Stephanie shares how childhood shame led to an eating disorder, which had a profound affect on her ability to relate with her sexuality and her sexual partners.

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Dealing with post-sex UTIs show art Dealing with post-sex UTIs

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Dr. Evelin Dacker returns to answer a listener’s question about common and chronic UTI’s that occur after sex. She breaks down the how and why, and addresses prevention and treatment.

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They can't find the clit without a roadmap - Alexa (take 2) show art They can't find the clit without a roadmap - Alexa (take 2)

Good Girls Talk About Sex

“Deaf U” star Alexa Paulay-Simmons gets candid about who she is (and always has been) as a sexual person, and how that’s shaped her life.

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An error in translation show art An error in translation

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Hey friends, You’ll notice this isn’t the regular episode you were expecting!  The regular episode was loaded into the feed, and some of you may have already downloaded and listened to it. However, I made an error in the production of this episode so, in fairness to our guest, I’ve pulled the episode to fix it. Here’s what happened – Our guest, Alexa, is Deaf and we did the interview through an interpreter.  It was my first time ever doing an interview through an interpreter, so it took me a little time to relax into it. What didn’t occur to me was to send the transcript...

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My pandemic sex life show art My pandemic sex life

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Leah gets real about how her intimate life has weathered the pandemic, and how confronting her partner’s depression spiral turned out to be a better strategy—for both of them—than enduring it.

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He was a god and I was a kid - Debbie show art He was a god and I was a kid - Debbie

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Debbie was formed by experiences of both pleasure and pain. She was blessed with good early relationships, but also is a survivor of the epidemic of sexual abuse in elite women’s sport. Her faith in herself helped her choose to heal.

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Improve your sex life with the STARS talk show art Improve your sex life with the STARS talk

Good Girls Talk About Sex

STARS is an easy-to-remember acronym for conversations that lead to awesome consensual sex.

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I tried to pee standing up – Lachlan show art I tried to pee standing up – Lachlan

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Lachlan was born with a vagina. His is the story of how a boy learned to be a girl, then learned to be invisible, then a lesbian, before learning that he could just be who he was all along, except that it’s still … complicated.

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What’s your favorite kind of touch? show art What’s your favorite kind of touch?

Good Girls Talk About Sex

What kind of touch do you enjoy? Have you thought about the ways, and places? Touch is a many-splendored thing.

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More Episodes

STARS is an easy-to-remember acronym for conversations that lead to awesome consensual sex.

Dr. Evelin Dacker developed the STARS method to create a way for potential and current partners to have a thorough and safe conversation about physical and relationship expectations.

 

Public Service Announcement: Sometimes discovery is the mother of tension. Intimate play can be easier and much more fun if you go in knowing what each other likes, or doesn’t.

 

Bookmark moments:

2:39 - What is the STARS conversation? Plus, if you’ve had it before, you should have it again.

6:36 - Dr. Evelin Dacker explains sex positivity.

9:03 - As she engaged in health research earlier in her career, she realized there’s a total lack of sex talk in the field.

12:11 - Leah shares an experience she had at her first small group portion of a STARS class. When asked to share what her turn-ons and avoids were, she burst into tears and couldn’t speak.

14:12 – Dr. Dacker breaks down each letter in STARS, and what those categories encompass. For example, dealing with shame and stigma are a part of the STI portion of the talk.

16:21 - Avoids are often boundaries related to trauma and fear; they may not be forever fixed. Also, don’t wait to talk about them until you’re heavy in the bedroom and unable to clearly hear your partner!

24:15 - Leah demonstrates a full STARS talk with her friend Ray.

 

Mentioned in this episode:

 

Join me on Patreon:

As of July 2020, all Good Girls Talk About Sex audio extras are now FREE!  They can be accessed at www.patreon.com/goodgirlstalkaboutsex

I've done this because not everyone has the means to pay for access, and I know this additional material can be deeply important for some listeners. But creating this show isn't free, so if you’d like to support the work I do, I am grateful for your contributions at www.patreon.com/goodgirlstalkaboutsex.

 

BE PART OF THE SHOW:

Rate this pod: Leave a rating and review at www.ratethispodcast.com/goodgirls

 

Have a question or comment - Leave a voicemail for Leah at 720-GOOD-SEX (720-466-3739) - this is a voicemail-only line, so I promise you won't have to talk to someone in person!

 

Be a guest on the show - I'd love to talk with you! Fill out the form at www.leahcarey.com/guest

 

FOLLOW LEAH:

Instagram - www.instagram.com/goodgirlstalk
Private Facebook Group - www.facebook.com/groups/goodgirlstalk
YouTube - www.youtube.com/goodgirlstalk
Leah's website - www.leahcarey.com
Podcast website - www.goodgirlstalk.com

 

WORK WITH LEAH:

Learn about coaching with Leah - www.leahcarey.com/coaching

 

Join a PJ Party for Grown Ups - www.leahcarey.com/pjparty

 

EPISODE CREDITS:

Host / Producer – Leah Carey (email)
Audio Editor – Gretchen Kilby
Administrative Support - Lara O'Connor, Maria Franco

Transcript creation – Jan Acielo
Music – Nazar Rybak