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Improve your sex life with the STARS talk

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Release Date: 01/14/2021

The Goodbye Episode show art The Goodbye Episode

Good Girls Talk About Sex

In the final episode of Good Girls Talk About Sex, I talk about why I've decided to end the podcast and what's coming next. For those wishing to keep the podcast legacy alive, the archives are available for download at . Safeguard this invaluable content before any legal restrictions come into play. A heartfelt thank you for your unwavering support through the years. Though the podcast is ending, our conversation is not. Join me on YouTube, and let's keep working to make a more positive world. With love and gratitude, Leah 💕   GET THE ARCHIVES: 📢📢 📢📢   LET'S STAY...

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The Widow's Guide to Dead Bastards - Coaching Jessica show art The Widow's Guide to Dead Bastards - Coaching Jessica

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Jessica's world was turned upside down when her husband died suddenly and she uncovered evidence of his endless lies and a second life that she'd known nothing about. Had she been blind to the red flags her husband was waving? Or did she know more than she allowed herself to admit? In this special (mid-hiatus!) episode, Leah talks with Jessica Waite whose book "The Widow's Guide To Dead Bastards" is available today from Atria.  They focus on a pivotal chapter from the book, exploring the questions that still linger for Jessica: What did she know? What was she intentionally blind to? And...

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Never go to bed angry & other terrible advice show art Never go to bed angry & other terrible advice

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Some people swear by Dear Abby, others swear at Dear Abby. Today we look at some of Dear Abby's terrible advice. PLUS: Stay until the end to hear an important announcement about the podcast going on hiatus so Leah can take a well-deserved rest.   Become a client: Support Leah's work: Full episode show notes:  

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Road Trips and Sex Without Shame show art Road Trips and Sex Without Shame

Good Girls Talk About Sex

In this Pop Culture Pillow Talk, I talk with pop culture critic Kristen Meinzer about two great movies: Joy Ride Plan B You can find Kristen at:   Become a client: Support the show: Full show notes: 

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Bonus quickie show art Bonus quickie

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Plan B -  Joy Ride -    Become a client: Apply for a free coaching session:   Support the show:

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Find the red flags! - Coaching Sophilia show art Find the red flags! - Coaching Sophilia

Good Girls Talk About Sex

In this coaching episode, Sophilia asks: why does she keep ending up in relationships where things don’t feel right, and the entire weight of making it better falls on her? Leah works with Sophilia to: understand the red flags for this type of relationship, the communication skills that will help screen them out, rethink her own experience of being turned on. Sophilia is a 39-year-old, cisgender woman. She describes herself as queer, single, and multi-racial with a white mother and Black father. In the past she’s been in monogamous relationships, but currently prefers the idea of being...

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When the man teaching consent is the one violating you show art When the man teaching consent is the one violating you

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Last year I found myself in the middle of a shitstorm for daring to expose a community leader's abusive behavior. Today I tell the whole story. The backlash was immediate and intense, with DARVO (Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender) tactics used to paint me as the problem. Suddenly, I was not just standing as a representative of this man’s abuse, but also receiving harassment and ostracization from those I once considered my community. Sharing this story isn't just about telling you what’s going on; it's about shining a light on the dark corners of abuse and systemic failure....

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Pop Culture Pillow Talk: Starstruck on HBO show art Pop Culture Pillow Talk: Starstruck on HBO

Good Girls Talk About Sex

What happens when your brain is so busy it can't slow down to enjoy having sexy time with the cute guy who's totally into you?  In today's episode, we break down the first two episodes of the HBO show Starstruck with teen sex and relationship educator Julia Sheldon (who also happens to be Leah's dear friend.) We focus on lead character Jessie and how overthinking gets in the way of being present. Upcoming Beyond Permission class schedule: Thursday, Feb. 22 - Embracing your inner MILF with Danielle Tuesday, Feb. 27 - Dating at midlife with Leah Tuesday, March 5 - Sex toys show & tell...

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Having the best sex of my life at 63 - Debbie show art Having the best sex of my life at 63 - Debbie

Good Girls Talk About Sex

In this coaching/storytelling episode, Debbie talks about having the best sex of her life at age 63. Her question: Is that usual? While Debbie has always been multi-orgasmic, now she's having dozens of orgasms in a single sex session. And the connection with her new husband is a big part of the reason. Debbie is a 63 year old cisgender woman. She describes herself as white, heterosexual, monogamous, married. She describes her body as slender and athletic. And don't forget: the BEYOND PERMISSION workshop starts next week! Use coupon code "beyond20" to join us!   BEYOND PERMISSION workshop...

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Why don't you want to have sex with me? show art Why don't you want to have sex with me?

Good Girls Talk About Sex

Togetherness is an HBO show that explores the challenges of maintaining a healthy and active sex life in a long-term relationship with small children. In today's episode, Danielle Silverstein from the popular Marriage and Martinis podcast joins Leah to discuss the first two episodes of the show. They dive into the complexities of sexual fulfillment, gender roles, expectations and resentments. Join us for a deep, thought-provoking, and insightful conversation about challenges of maintaining intimacy in a long-term relationship.   BEYOND PERMISSION workshop (use code "beyond20" for $20 off...

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More Episodes

STARS is an easy-to-remember acronym for conversations that lead to awesome consensual sex.

Dr. Evelin Dacker developed the STARS method to create a way for potential and current partners to have a thorough and safe conversation about physical and relationship expectations.

 

Public Service Announcement: Sometimes discovery is the mother of tension. Intimate play can be easier and much more fun if you go in knowing what each other likes, or doesn’t.

 

Bookmark moments:

2:39 - What is the STARS conversation? Plus, if you’ve had it before, you should have it again.

6:36 - Dr. Evelin Dacker explains sex positivity.

9:03 - As she engaged in health research earlier in her career, she realized there’s a total lack of sex talk in the field.

12:11 - Leah shares an experience she had at her first small group portion of a STARS class. When asked to share what her turn-ons and avoids were, she burst into tears and couldn’t speak.

14:12 – Dr. Dacker breaks down each letter in STARS, and what those categories encompass. For example, dealing with shame and stigma are a part of the STI portion of the talk.

16:21 - Avoids are often boundaries related to trauma and fear; they may not be forever fixed. Also, don’t wait to talk about them until you’re heavy in the bedroom and unable to clearly hear your partner!

24:15 - Leah demonstrates a full STARS talk with her friend Ray.

 

Mentioned in this episode:

 

Join me on Patreon:

As of July 2020, all Good Girls Talk About Sex audio extras are now FREE!  They can be accessed at www.patreon.com/goodgirlstalkaboutsex

I've done this because not everyone has the means to pay for access, and I know this additional material can be deeply important for some listeners. But creating this show isn't free, so if you’d like to support the work I do, I am grateful for your contributions at www.patreon.com/goodgirlstalkaboutsex.

 

BE PART OF THE SHOW:

Rate this pod: Leave a rating and review at www.ratethispodcast.com/goodgirls

 

Have a question or comment - Leave a voicemail for Leah at 720-GOOD-SEX (720-466-3739) - this is a voicemail-only line, so I promise you won't have to talk to someone in person!

 

Be a guest on the show - I'd love to talk with you! Fill out the form at www.leahcarey.com/guest

 

FOLLOW LEAH:

Instagram - www.instagram.com/goodgirlstalk
Private Facebook Group - www.facebook.com/groups/goodgirlstalk
YouTube - www.youtube.com/goodgirlstalk
Leah's website - www.leahcarey.com
Podcast website - www.goodgirlstalk.com

 

WORK WITH LEAH:

Learn about coaching with Leah - www.leahcarey.com/coaching

 

Join a PJ Party for Grown Ups - www.leahcarey.com/pjparty

 

EPISODE CREDITS:

Host / Producer – Leah Carey (email)
Audio Editor – Gretchen Kilby
Administrative Support - Lara O'Connor, Maria Franco

Transcript creation – Jan Acielo
Music – Nazar Rybak