How to Survive: Alien Resurrection (1997)
How to Survive
How to Survive is now on Patreon! Support us at Patreon.com/HowtoSurvivePod to get every episode one week early, plus monthly bonus episodes and more. It’s episode 299…My mommy always said there were no monsters. No real ones. But there are. Alien Resurrection (1997) is the concluding chapter in the Alien Quadrilogy, and introduces Ripley 8, a supercharged Xeno-human hybrid of Ellen Ripley, cloned in a lab to act as a genetic vessel to recover the Xenomorphs from the annals of history 200 years after both they and Ripley were obliterated in molten lava at the end of Alien 3. It really is...
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How to Survive: The Substance (2024)
How to Survive
How to Survive is now on Patreon! Support us at Patreon.com/HowtoSurvivePod to get every episode one week early, plus monthly bonus episodes and more. It’s episode 298…and at 50, it all stops. The Substance (2024) follows Elisabeth Sparkle, a fading Hollywood star who is fired from her TV fitness show when she reaches 50. Learning of ‘The Substance’, a black market pharmaceutical product that promises to create ‘a better version of you’, she signs up, producing Sue - a younger, idealised version of herself who soon finds the stardom Elisabeth has lost. But, despite being the same...
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How to Survive: Love Lies Bleeding (2024)
How to Survive
Anyone can feel strong hiding behind a piece of metal. I prefer to know my own strength. Love Lies Bleeding (2024) tells the story of Lou, a gym owner who falls in love with Jackie, a gym user who plans to enter a bodybuilding contest. As they fall deeper in love, they become tied up in violence, deception and crime - all thanks to Lou’s family and their violent, deceitful, criminal ways. We offer investigation tips to the FBI, question whose perspective you can really trust, and question the true romantic intention in giving someone drugs the moment you meet them. All of which...
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How to Survive: Censor (2021)
How to Survive
How to Survive is now on Patreon! Support us at Patreon.com/HowtoSurvivePod to get every episode one week early, plus monthly bonus episodes and more. It’s episode 296…and you’d be surprised what the human brain can edit out when it can't handle the truth. Censor (2021) follows Enid, a censor at the BBFC during the moral panic around ‘Video Nasties’ - a 1980s proliferation of graphic horror movies flooding the new frontier of VHS home entertainment. Enid acts as a kind of moral guardian, exposing herself to these films so the wider public don’t have to, but when one film unearths...
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How to Survive: Ghostwatch (1992)
How to Survive
How to Survive is now on Patreon! Support us at Patreon.com/HowtoSurvivePod to get every episode one week early, plus monthly bonus episodes and more. It’s episode 295…and what big eyes you have, what big hands you have. Ghostwatch (1992) was broadcast ‘as live’ on BBC 1, on Halloween night in 1992, and saw TV stalwarts Michael Parkinson and Sarah Greene trying to prove the existence of the paranormal by taking a camera crew to ‘the most haunted house in Britain’. While the show documented the Early family’s suffering at the hands of Mr Pipes, the poltergeist, the real story...
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How to Survive: MaXXXine (2024)
How to Survive
How to Survive is now on Patreon! Support us at Patreon.com/HowtoSurvivePod to get every episode one week early, plus monthly bonus episodes and more. It’s episode 294…and you've made it to the belly of the beast, congratulations, very few come this far. MaXXXine (2024) concludes Ti West’s X trilogy, following Maxine Minx in her journey to Hollywood stardom. But as she’s pursued by a mysterious leather-clad stalker, it’s not long before Maxine’s friends and colleagues start turning up dead. Is Maxine’s bloody past catching up to her, or is something even more sinister at play? We...
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How to Survive: Longlegs (2024)
How to Survive
How to Survive is now on Patreon! Support us at Patreon.com/HowtoSurvivePod to get every episode one week early, plus monthly bonus episodes and more. It’s episode 293…and I'm sorry, it seems I wore my long legs today. Longlegs (2024) follows FBI agent Lee Harker, who is assigned to the case of a serial killer who is apparently responsible for compelling several patriarchs to murder their families across multiple decades, with the only trace being cryptic letters signed ‘Longlegs’. Can Agent Harker prevent more murders, and will Longlegs’ origins prove to be closer to home than she...
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How to Survive: Infested (2023)
How to Survive
aka Vermines (2023) It’s episode 292…and are you interested in animals? Infested/Vermines (2023) tells the story of Kaleb, a young man with a passion for selling sneakers and buying bugs. Living in a multicultural melting pot of a tower block, his friendships have become strained following the death of his mother. Can he reconnect with his Jordy, his childhood best friend, and reconcile with his sister Manon? Anything is possible if you move forward with grace and acceptance. Oh, and he also bought a new spider and it’s escaped. Probably fine. We talk about a genuinely horrific set...
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How to Survive: Arachnophobia (1990)
How to Survive
How to Survive is now on Patreon! Support us at Patreon.com/HowtoSurvivePod to get every episode one week early, plus monthly bonus episodes and more. It’s episode 291…and would anyone object if I tore this floor out? Arachnophobia (1990) takes us to the sleepy Californian town of Canaima, via the jungle sinkholes of Venezuela, to follow the story of the newly arrived family physician Dr Ross Jennings. When townsfolk begin dropping dead in mysterious circumstances, Jennings suspects foul play of the eight-legged variety, but is it just his Arachnophobia talking? No, as we’ve...
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How to Survive: Paprika (2006)
How to Survive
How to Survive is now on Patreon! Support us at Patreon.com/HowtoSurvivePod to get every episode one week early, plus monthly bonus episodes and more. It’s episode 290…and the Internet and dreams are similar. They're areas where the repressed conscious mind escapes. Paprika (2006) follows its titular dream-based protagonist, and her real-life alter ego Dr Atsuko Chiba, as she administers a futuristic form of therapy using a prototype device called the DC Mini. However, when so-called ‘Dream Terrorists’ steal the devices and use it to run rampant through other people’s...
info_outlineHow to Survive is now on Patreon! Support us at Patreon.com/HowtoSurvivePod to get every episode one week early, plus monthly bonus episodes and more.
It’s episode 298…and at 50, it all stops.
The Substance (2024) follows Elisabeth Sparkle, a fading Hollywood star who is fired from her TV fitness show when she reaches 50. Learning of ‘The Substance’, a black market pharmaceutical product that promises to create ‘a better version of you’, she signs up, producing Sue - a younger, idealised version of herself who soon finds the stardom Elisabeth has lost. But, despite being the same person, Elisabeth and Sue become increasingly fractious roommates, and as their contempt for one another grows, disaster ensues.
We break down one of the best films of the last year, a tour-de-force of body horror maximalism, featuring a million shots of an arse, disgusting eating sounds and jaw-dropping prosthetic effects. But is it good? Does it, while highlighting the objectification of women, objectify women in turn? And how much arse is too much arse? All this and more to come.
All of which leads to one question: How would you survive?
Whatever happens, one thing's for sure: Everything comes from you. Everything is you. This is simply a better version of yourself.