Episode 231 - Reliance on a Teacher
Buddhism for Everyone with JoAnn Fox
In a world obsessed with DIY, YouTube tutorials, and learning everything ourselves, navigating the depths of our own minds can land us not knowing where to start or how to practice. In this episode of Buddhism for Everyone, JoAnn Fox breaks down a foundational practice in Tibetan Buddhism: Relying on a Spiritual Teacher. Far from checking your brain at the door or surrendering your autonomy, relying on a spiritual guide is like hiring an experienced mountain guide before attempting to summit Everest. Having a teacher is genuinely a life-hack that saves you years of trial and error. In this...
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Episode 230 - Gratitude & Emptiness
Buddhism for Everyone with JoAnn Fox
When we hear the word "emptiness" (shunyata) in Buddhist philosophy, it’s easy to mistake it for nothingness or a bleak void. But true emptiness isn’t an absence of life: it is the absence of separation. It means nothing exists independently. Everything is interconnected. Everything depends on causes and conditions. One of the causes of how things exist is how we perceive them! So, how do we move this beautiful concept from our heads into our hearts? Through the daily practice of gratitude. The Mind as a Creator When we practice gratitude, we vividly see that things don't have a fixed,...
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Episode 229 - Boundaries in Buddhism
Buddhism for Everyone with JoAnn Fox
In Buddhism, we’re encouraged to cherish others more and deepen our compassion. Some may wonder if there is a contradiction between these heart-opening practices and having healthy boundaries. But here is the truth: even the Buddha set boundaries. In the texts, the Buddha frequently chose who to engage with, when to enter noble silence, and how to protect himself so he could serve the world effectively. In fact, true compassion requires boundaries. Sometimes the kindest thing to do for another is to set a strong boundary. In this episode, JoAnn Fox explores the concept of boundaries through...
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Episode 228 - Be Love
Buddhism for Everyone with JoAnn Fox
If you’ve ever longed for love—and let’s be honest, who hasn’t?—you’ll recognize the familiar dance our minds do. We build the "ideal" in our heads. We make lists of the qualities we need in a partner. We dissect our past heartbreaks like forensic investigators, trying to figure out exactly what went wrong. We search and search, looking outward for that one person who will finally fill the cup. But what if we’re looking at the map upside down? Buddhist wisdom suggests that the path to fulfillment isn't about finding the perfect love, but about becoming it. We...
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Episode 227 - Always Rely on a Happy Mind Alone
Buddhism for Everyone with JoAnn Fox
Always rely on a happy mind alone. This Buddhist slogan for training the mind isn't about "positive thinking" or just being happy. A "happy mind" refers to a mind that is peaceful and free from delusions, like like anger, jealousy, pride or attachment. When a delusion like anger is operating in the mind, we no longer see clearly. A delusion is like a warped mirror: everything we see in this mirror is distorted. For example, when we’re hurt we might get angry at someone we love. Anger then makes us see that person as the cause of our pain, a threat, so that we speak and act in...
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Episode 226 - Tame the Monkey Mind
Buddhism for Everyone with JoAnn Fox
Register for the free classes, Continuing the Walk for Peace: An Inner Peace Toolkit: https://buddhismforeveryone.com/walk-for-peace-toolkit In this episode, we talk about your monkey. The monkey on your back. You know the one. The brilliant, overachieving, slightly unhinged creature swinging through your mind at 2:00 a.m. reorganizing your life, replaying arguments, drafting emails you will never send. In an old Buddhist story, a man is given a magical monkey by his spiritual teacher. The magical monkey can do anything. Grant any wish. At first, it’s amazing. The monkey...
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Episose 225 - Is your mind the Matrix?
Buddhism for Everyone with JoAnn Fox
In The Matrix, the red pill reveals the truth behind appearances and opens the path to freedom. In Buddhism, a realization of the true nature of reality is the ultimate path to freedom. In this episode, we explore how waking up to reality gives us the ability to reshape who you are because nothing is fixed learn to bend the “rules” of your reality unplug from emotional reactivity Buddha explained the ultimate truth of reality as “emptiness.” Emptiness does not mean nothingness. This teaching doesn’t mean that nothing exists. We have to ask ourselves, what is reality empty of?...
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Episode 224: Finding Happiness in Others' Joy
Buddhism for Everyone with JoAnn Fox
Imagine feeling a burst of joy every time someone else wins. A friend gets a promotion, your sister finds love, a stranger shares good news, and you feel happiness with them. That spark of delight is the heart of sympathetic joy, or mudita, a Buddhist practice that flips the script on comparison and jeaousy. It turns the happiness of others into a source of our own happiness. It’s not magic, but it feels like it. When sympathetic joy is practiced with the bodhicitta intention to become a Buddha for the benefit of all beings, it becomes "Immeasurable Joy." Immeasurable Joy is a trained...
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Episode 223 - Feed love or Feed Pain
Buddhism for Everyone with JoAnn Fox
We constantly make small choices that shape the reality of our relationships, whether with our partner, children, friends, or colleagues. They determine whether we deepen connection or cause resentment and distance to quietly grow. Every moment holds a fork in the road: Will I feed love, or will I feed pain? In this episode, we look the difference between love and attachment. Love is the wish that another person be happy. Attachment is the wish that they make us happy. Attachment is the habit of selfishness in relationships that causes pain. The strength of a relationship is directly...
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Episode 222: Preventing Anger
Buddhism for Everyone with JoAnn Fox
Longtime Buddhist Teacher, JoAnn Fox, explores five powerful Buddhist antidotes to anger and aversion: patience acceptance recognizing karma remembering impermanence seeing other people or challenges as spiritual teachers compassion Learn how to meet challenges with wisdom instead of reaction. Buddha reminds us that peace isn’t about avoiding pain; it’s about understanding it. By practicing a simple yet profound method, W.A.I.T What Am I Thinking, we begin to free ourselves from the fires of aversion and cultivate genuine calm instead. In this way, we can...
info_outlineWith stories of yogis who spent years practicing alone in isolated mountain caves, it might seem like Buddhism promotes a solitary path. But in reality, Buddha spoke many times of the importance of good friends. Friends that are a good influence on us are essential to our well-being and spiritual development. Once, Ananda said to the Buddha that good friends are half the Holy Life. Buddha replied, “No, Ananda, having good friends isn’t half of the Holy Life. Having good friends is the whole of the Holy Life.”
Buddha also said, “it is better to go alone” than to have friends who negatively influence us. Because we are so easily, almost subconsciously, affected by those we spend a lot of time with, we must choose our companions carefully. In this episode, we look at how vital deep friendships are and the inner qualities of friendship.
In the Sigalaka Sutra, the Buddha named these four types of friend:
- The helpful friend:
- protects you when you are careless
- looks after your property when you are forgetful
- is a refuge when you are frightened
- when some need arises, gives you twice the wealth required
- The friend who shares one’s happiness and suffering:
- reveals their secrets to you, but guards your secrets
- would not abandon you when you are in trouble
- they would even sacrifice their life for your sake
- The friend who points out what is good:
- discourages you from doing evil or harmful things
- enjoins you in doing good things
- informs you what you have not heard
- points out the path of love and compassion
- The sympathetic friend:
- never rejoices in your misfortune
- rejoices in your good fortune
- stops those who speak poorly of you
- commends those who speak praise of you
Which of these four types of friends best describes you? What qualities of friendship could you improve? In our weekly mindfulness practice, we can engage in purposeful actions to strengthen our friendships and inner qualities.
If you find an intelligent companion,
A fellow traveler
A sage of good conduct,
You should travel together,
Delighted and mindful,
Overcoming all dangers. (328)
If you do not find an intelligent companion,
A fellow traveler
Of good conduct and wise,
Travel alone,
Like a king renouncing a conquered kingdom,
Like the elephant Matanga in the forest. (329)*
There is no companionship with a fool;
It is better to go alone.
Travel alone, at ease, doing no evil
Like the elephant Matanga in the forest. (330)
References and Links
Buddha.The Dhammapada. Translated by Gil Fronsdale. (Kindle). Shambala, Boston and London, 2011. (Link)
Wikipedia contributors. (2021, October 21). Kalyāṇa-mittatā. In Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia. Retrieved 20:38, August 14, 2022, from https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Kaly%C4%81%E1%B9%87a-mittat%C4%81&oldid=1051137163
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