Keepin' It Real with Cam Marston
On this week’s Keepin It Real, Cam discussion rebellion in children and how it’s recently hit his home. ----- All children rebel against their family and their parents. I certainly did. I see photos of myself as a teen with hair touching my collar and remember my father telling me over and over again to get it cut. I didn’t and maybe I didn’t because it bothered him so much. I knew my kids would rebel, too. It was inevitable. And much of it’s been the same over time – hair styles, vocabulary, music, and clothing. These are the signs of rebellion. They have been for a long long...
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On today's keepin it real, Cam reminds each of us AND HIMSELF that being thankful is not a seasonal behavior but an attitude we should aspire to live year round. ----- Today the tone should be, well, thankful. Thankful for my friends and family. Thankful for my health and safety. Thankful for all the food I had yesterday. Thankful that its finally getting cool outside. Thankful that no one else in my family likes cranberries so I can eat as much as I want. There’s a lot to be thankful for but I propose that thanks for these very things needs attention year around. Not a pithy,...
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On this Week's Keepin It Real, Cam is tired of people not from Alabama degrading and belittling our state. But in this certain case, Cam says, we might deserve it. ----- Go find a podcast called The Alabama Murders. It’s a seven-episode series by author Malcolm Gladwell done under his Revisionist History podcast. I love Revisionist History – it’s been one of my favorite podcasts for a long time but, well, The Alabama Murders is yet another example of someone who is not from here looking at Alabama with shame and disgust. Our state has been the target of this for a long long time....
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Are traditions the same thing as routines, they're just done less frequently? And if the tradition is both loved and hated, what does that mean? On today's Keepin It Real, Cam shares that he both loves and hates them. ----- I have a routine that I practice nearly every day. I both look forward to it and hate it. I wake up shortly after 5am. I have clothes laid out on a chair next to the bed and I dress and go into the kitchen and start the coffee. I fold laundry while it brews. I then pour myself a cup and sit in my morning chair and write in my journal for about thirty minutes. I then...
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On this week's Keepin It Real, it's Friday and Cam's brain has had enough. He once wanted to keep going. Now, he's just hoping to make it to today. ----- I can remember complaining that there simply weren’t enough days in the week to get all the stuff I needed get done done. I wished that each day was longer and the work week had more days to it. I wanted a twelve-hour workday and a ten-day work week and a three-day break at the end. That would be preferred, I thought. That way I could get everything done and take a break when it was over. Wow, have times changed. Or maybe I’ve...
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On this week's Keepin It Real, another chapter closes in Cam's life. And he wonders what comes next. ------ John Cougar Mellencamp has a song called Ain’t Even Done with the Night. It’s one of my favorites. That song became a regular part of my days four or five years ago. I’d pick my daughter up from her volleyball practice and as we made the turn from the gym onto the larger road, I’d ask Siri to play it. My daughter would protest and moan. “Not again, Dad” she’d say. I’d sing it loudly. It became our song in a weird way. She didn’t like it, didn’t want to hear it...
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On this week's Keepin It Real, Cam Marston continues to be interested in the research he's doing on retirement trends. He's discovered something called a Men's Shed which is different from a Man Cave where men can go and stand next to each other. ----- My work continues to lead me into retirement research. Specifically, how to make retirement fruitful and productive. One of the leading causes of an unhappy retirements is too few friends or no friends at all. Referred to as social isolation, the US Surgeon General said that social isolation is as unhealthy as smoking fifteen cigarettes a...
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On this week's Keepin It Real, Cam Marston and his buddies are beginning to discuss retirement. Cam's learning, though, that maybe working so hard to get to retirement may not be worth all the effort. ----- The subject of retirement has come with my crowd lately. A few years ago, we maybe whispered about retirement, but now it’s a full-on conversation – when are you going to retire, we’re asking each other. How will you know it’s time? The answer from nearly everyone is “as soon as possible” and “I’m ready right now.” Last week I had breakfast with a lady in healthcare...
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On this week’s Keepin It Real, Cam’s on his way home from a conference. He began making notes a few days ago about what his years and years of attending conferences has taught him. A bingo card might be fun, he says. ----- I speak at few dozen conferences each year. My audiences are the same – thinning brown haired, slightly overweight, middle aged white guys dominate each room. These are my people. I’ve learned how they like my content delivered and I do it for them each time. If I do it well, it may get me invited back. After twenty plus years, I’ve seen hundreds of events,...
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On this week’s Keepin’ It Real, Cam admits he feels helpless in today’s political climate but he’s found something he can do. It’s very small, but at least it’s something. ----- I have quite a few friends who, over the years, have tried to persuade me to get out of the stock market due to some crisis or another. “Pull all your money out,” they say, “this time it’s not some run of the mill crisis. This one’s real. It’s different this time.” It’s different this time. We are so often tempted to think that whatever the crisis, this one is different. Rarely, very...
info_outlineOn this week's Keepin It Real, Cam Marston and his buddies are beginning to discuss retirement. Cam's learning, though, that maybe working so hard to get to retirement may not be worth all the effort.
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The subject of retirement has come with my crowd lately. A few years ago, we maybe whispered about retirement, but now it’s a full-on conversation – when are you going to retire, we’re asking each other. How will you know it’s time? The answer from nearly everyone is “as soon as possible” and “I’m ready right now.”
Last week I had breakfast with a lady in healthcare who leads education for medical doctors for a very progressive organization out west. We talked shop for a bit. She had lots of ambitions plans for her organization. She sounded like someone fully engaged and stimulated by their work. My guess is she’s about my age and I asked if she ever thought about retirement. In a rush she said “Oh goodness yes. I can’t wait.” “When do you want to retire?” I asked. “As soon as I can,” she said. “But it sounds like you enjoy your work.” I was confused. “I do,” she said, “but I’m ready to not have to do it anymore.” She enjoyed it but doesn’t want to have to do it.
Similarly, I’ve heard more references to burnout recently than I’ve ever heard. A friend in Mississippi said his wife could tell he was burned so badly that she needed him to either take a year off or buy a new boat. Now that’s a supportive spouse! He was lucky to have her and he knew it. I’m hearing burnout references in my calls and with other friends and colleagues, too. Seems like Covid ramped up burnout – before then I seldom heard it. Since then, I hear it more, especially recently. Social Scientist and author Arthur Brooks defined burnout as a “vortex of exhaustion, cynicism, and self-criticism.” Wow. But, yep! They all feed each other. The things that used to make you happy about your work now make you unhappy. And, for what it’s worth, I read a study that Gen X’ers were experiencing burnout at higher rates than not only any generation today, but any generation every surveyed. I guess that’s something to brag about – my generation has broken the unhappiness bell curve.
Burned out and aching for retirement. No employer wants that guy on their team. Then I read that over forty percent of retirees have an unsatisfactory retirement. Retirement’s not all it’s cracked up to be, they say. Without work, they have no friends and no purpose. The “retirement red zone” is an expression financial professionals use to refer to the five years before and after retirement when you’re supposed to get your financial world in order. Turns out this red zone also refers to getting your non-financial retirement world in order, too – making friends outside of work, developing curiosity to drive your hobbies, especially hobbies that include meeting new people. Learning to structure your day when no one else is telling you how to do it. And then, of course, healthy activity. No retirement is enjoyable if you let your health go.
It all makes me wonder, as I feverishly work towards my own retirement, if the emotional and psychological price I’m paying to get there will be worth it?
I’m Cam Marston, just trying to keep it real.