258: Freeze, Ramble, Go Silent? Coach Yourself in Real Time

Ever freeze mid-sentence in a meeting? Start rambling when challenged? Or walk away thinking, “Why didn’t I speak up?”

You’re not alone. This episode is going to be your go-to toolkit for navigating those high-pressure moments with more clarity and confidence.

In this episode, I unpack what pressure really does to high-achieving women — and more importantly, how to coach yourself through it in real time, even when your heart is racing and your voice feels like it’s vanished. If you’ve ever wanted to feel more grounded, more articulate, and more in control under fire, this one’s for you.

"Leadership isn't about what you say out loud, it's about what you say to yourself before you open your mouth." — Toni Collis

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Why freezing, rambling, or going silent is NOT a sign of incompetence
• How to interrupt the “pressure spiral” before it derails your confidence
• Micro self-coaching tools — no journaling required
• Shifting from reactive to grounded leadership in high-stakes situations
• How to apply my “Hold, Don’t Carry” method so you stop replaying every meeting in your head
• Using the Say It Like a Leader script pack to pair inner clarity with outer confidence
• And more!

This is for you if:

• You’ve ever walked out of a meeting replaying every word
• You freeze, clam-up and worry about speaking up
• You get frustrated when interrupted or dismissed
• You want to build executive presence without faking it
• You’re navigating pressure, visibility, or senior rooms and want to show up powerfully — even when interrupted, dismissed, or put on the spot

 

**Useful links**

• Download the free companion guide: Say It Like a Leader: https://tonicollis.com/sayitlikealeader
• Want to learn more about the concept of Hold Don’t Carry? Listen to Episode 195: Hold Don’t Carry with Lindsay White here: https://tonicollis.com/episode195 
• If you are ready to uplevel your career, get unstuck or you are simply ready to unlock those leadership time-management techniques then join us in my monthly career & leadership coaching program exclusively for women in tech: https://www.tonicollis.com/academy 
• Catch the show notes, and more details about today's episode here: https://tonicollis.com/episode258
• Check us out on Youtube.
• Join the Leading Women in Tech community in Slack where we discuss all-the-things for women’s tech leadership, covering everything from early-career leadership to C-level executives.