Montessori math
My New Life
Math is all around us. When it comes to teaching it, the challenge lies not in creating the opportunities, but in recognizing them. Counting grapes while they disappear is a fun one! Around the age of 4, a child’s mathematical knowledge takes a big leap forward. They go from counting and recognizing numbers, to understanding 1:1 correspondence and being able to complete simple addition. As parents, we can support them in this leap by providing things to count, line up, and compare. Lovevery’s Montessori Math Bars & Number Tiles for months 43-45 are a great place to start. On this...
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Montessori handwriting
My New Life
The Montessori method is rooted in the idea that children can—and should—be empowered to do things on their own. On this episode of My New Life, we consider handwriting through a Montessori lens. But how much independence can we truly expect from a child who is forming words on paper for the first time? You may be surprised to learn that a toddler can start practicing handwriting as early as age 3. It all comes down to building the foundations through play! Host Jessica Rolph is joined by Julia Volkman, who wrote her thesis at Harvard on the moveable alphabet. Julia, founder of , says...
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Montessori literacy
My New Life
Even if your 3-year-old can recite their ABCs like a pro, they’ll need to learn that spoken words are made up of individual sounds to succeed at reading. Hands-on activities that build this kind of phonemic awareness — and reinforce the connection between letter sounds and letter shapes — are the best way to teach them what they need to know. As with all kinds of hands-on learning, Montessori is a great place to start! Did you know that in Montessori classrooms, children learn to spell before they learn to read? Word building with the moveable alphabet is at the heart of this...
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Executive function: Empathy
My New Life
Empathy can be a puzzling concept for a young child. They often need adults to model it for them. When reading stories or playing with the wooden peg people together, ask your child: “How do you think that person is feeling right now? How can you tell? How would you feel in his place?” Encourage your child to notice the clues in their environment and use them to draw conclusions. In this final episode in the executive function series, Senior Director of Programs at Rebecca Parlakian joins Host Jessica Rolph to look at how empathy fits into the critical thinking skills coming online...
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Executive function: Flexible thinking
My New Life
Have you ever played “hot/cold” with your child? It’s good for a laugh, particularly when a child can’t find something in plain sight. But it’s also great at teaching young children flexible thinking, or the ability to adapt to change. As they are searching for the lost item, they are listening to directions and staying flexible when they have to change course. In this series on executive function, we’ve been looking at ways to help our children build these skills, which include working memory, impulse control and cognitive flexibility. These mental tasks take practice and must be...
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Executive function: Managing frustration
My New Life
Success in life — that looks different for everyone. But skills like persistence, managing frustration and emotional regulation tend to scaffold that success, no matter what the end result looks like. These skills are all part of what scientists call executive function, something we’re focusing on this season. We like to talk about executive function, because young children have lots of chances to practice these skills! In this episode, we look at how to build frustration tolerance. One of the best ways to do that is to play games — games where your child occasionally loses! Joining My...
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Executive function: Thinking ahead
My New Life
Executive functioning skills are important, because they help us achieve our goals. Children with strong executive functioning skills have the focus, patience, flexibility and resilience to succeed in—and out—of school. While children continue to develop these skills into adolescence, research shows they surge at 4 years old. And they can be really fun to practice! In this episode, My New Life Host Jessica Rolph welcomes Whitman Professor of Psychology Dr. Melissa Clearfield a second time. She first appeared on the show 3 years ago to discuss her research demonstrating differences in...
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When parenting feels unequal
My New Life
Our guest today is a mother of four children, ages 5 to 17. She knows well how the demands of parenting can run you into the ground. She made the choice to step off the “struggle bus of overwhelm” — as she calls it — but it was a move that took time, and conscious effort. The secret? Establishing clear boundaries. And choosing not to identify with the “mother as martyr” role. So many of us look for our partners to validate how hard we are working, before we give ourselves permission to delegate and take a break. Or hold onto resentment because we feel we are shouldering more than...
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Helping children deal with change
My New Life
Why can change be so unsettling for our toddlers? I mean, change up the snack crackers and you may have a major crisis on your hands. On this episode of My New Life, Jessical Rolph hosts Lael Stone, author of “Raising Resilient and Compassionate Children”. Never is our resilience put to the test more so than in the face of change. If you and your family are changing things up — be it a new home, new caregiver, or a new school, Lael will help you navigate what can be tricky terrain with your child. In addition to her work as a parent educator, she is a mother of three. You can find Lael ....
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Managing expectations as a mother
My New Life
For the most part, limits provide a framework that helps everyone move through the day more fluidly, and with less friction. But on this episode of My New Life, we discuss limiting beliefs — beliefs that interfere with our own wellbeing and that of our family. A big one is the notion that we can “have it all”. For parents who work outside the home, this can compound the pressure we already feel to be in more than one place at a time. And for parents who work inside the home, the line between family and professional needs gets easily blurred. Leaving everyone wondering: Am I a good...
info_outlineEmpathy can be a puzzling concept for a young child. They often need adults to model it for them. When reading stories or playing with the wooden peg people together, ask your child: “How do you think that person is feeling right now? How can you tell? How would you feel in his place?” Encourage your child to notice the clues in their environment and use them to draw conclusions.
In this final episode in the executive function series, Senior Director of Programs at Zero to Three Rebecca Parlakian joins Host Jessica Rolph to look at how empathy fits into the critical thinking skills coming online for your 4 year old.
Takeaways:
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Empathy is caught not taught. We are teaching our child what empathy is when we model it, but also when we empathize with them.
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Empathizing with our child doesn’t mean that we’re agreeing with them or doing exactly what they want us to do. Rather, it involves acknowledging that what we’re asking them to do is hard for them.
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In order for a child to recognize that what they did was wrong, they have to accept some degree of shame. That’s asking a lot of a 4 year old. Rebecca recommends shifting 100% of the attention to the child who has been hurt, and only later (in private), asking your child questions like: How did you know she didn’t like it?
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Rebecca has 3 suggestions for building empathy in the day-to-day with your child:
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Try to imagine how your baby is interpreting a situation and put that into words. For example: “It’s so frustrating when you can’t reach your pacifier!”
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Suggest ways that your child can show empathy. Something like: “Your cousin fell and hurt his knee. Would you like to help me get the ice pack for him?”
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Explore empathy in pretend play. So if we’re playing veterinarian, we can say: “The doggy has to have a shot, but look, he’s feeling a little scared…”
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Finally, Rebecca suggests using the Imagine-if cards in the Examiner Play Kit as a way to build empathy. For example: “Let’s imagine you’re at preschool. What if a friend is feeling sad about saying goodbye to their mom or dad? What could you do to help them?”
Mentioned in this episode:
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