“There is hope”: Recovering from pornography addiction
Release Date: 05/09/2023
Bonus episode: Changing perspectives to overcome bitterness
OCF Crosspoint Podcast
Show Notes In this bonus episode, Josh, Beth, and Corrie explore the challenges of bitterness and resentment in military marriages, highlighting the influence of faith, perspective shifts, and community support. They discuss the importance of diverse friendships, flexibility in family life, and seeking counseling. Emphasizing teamwork, Beth and Corrie share strategies for balancing responsibilities and overcoming feelings of isolation and resentment. Beth introduces insights from her new book for military spouses called while Corrie shares about her dynamic Instagram platform,...
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November 2024: Overcoming bitterness; reaching out to ROTC; and OCF ministry news
OCF Crosspoint Podcast
OCF MINISTRY NEWS New Bible study available: Visit to access this newest study, A Faithful Approach to Hardship and Suffering, on our website. GivingTuesday fundraiser: Give the gift of Christlike leadership this GivingTuesday (3 Dec.) by visiting and donating now. Job opening at WSS: If you would like more information and/or an application for this ministry opportunity, contact the WSS Center Director Paul Robyn ([email protected]) or the WSS Director of Hospitality Susanne Pappal ([email protected]), or call the main office via...
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October 2024: Sharing your faith in the military; OCF membership trends; and OCF ministry news
OCF Crosspoint Podcast
Show Notes OCF MINISTRY NEWS Job opening at the U.S. Coast Guard Academy: Contact PK Carlton () or Marci Morris () for more info, or visit to learn more about and apply for the opening at USCGA. Applications are open until 31 Oct. In His Service Retreat for women in uniform: Visit for more details about this retreat coming up in Jefferson, Texas. OCF Mid-Atlantic & Northeast Fall Retreat: Visit to learn more and register, and email any questions to the Chiaravallottis at [email protected]. Winter Retreats...
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Bonus episode: Seeing the five fingerprints of God in your life
OCF Crosspoint Podcast
In this episode, COL Andy MacLean, USA (Ret.), the coordinator for Latin America at the Association for Christian Conferences, Teaching and Services (ACCTS ()), discusses the mission of ACCTS and its work in developing Christian leaders in the armed forces worldwide. He shares his experiences working with military communities in Latin America and the challenges and opportunities he encounters. Andy also highlights the upcoming AMCF World Conference and the need for financial support and prayer for the conference's success. Andy then shares his testimony and the five...
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September 2024: The global military community; veteran involvement in OCF; and OCF ministry news
OCF Crosspoint Podcast
OCF MINISTRY NEWS Fort Knox OCF update: Continue praying for the ROTC cadets as they’ve returned to their campuses and begun new semesters. To learn more about and/or get involved with OCF’s ROTC ministry, visit Connected print newsletters: If you don’t receive this biannual piece in your mailbox this fall, be sure to update your info via so that we don’t miss you next spring. This fall’s newsletter will also be available online at Ted & Beverly Kaiser: Contact this newest couple on the OCF team by emailing OCF...
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Bonus episode: Finding God's purpose in suffering
OCF Crosspoint Podcast
Show Notes In this bonus episode of OCF Crosspoint, podcast host Josh Jackson continues his discussion with CH(CPT) Michael Will, USA (Ret.), focusing on the theme of hardship and suffering. The conversation delves into defining suffering, recognizing its various sources—such as persecution, sin, and the actions of others—and understanding its impact. They address the dangers of comparison, which can undermine endurance, and emphasize the importance of acknowledging our lack of control as a starting point for discovering God's purpose in suffering. The episode offers...
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August 2024: Seeing God’s hand during hardship; enlisted involvement in OCF; and OCF ministry news
OCF Crosspoint Podcast
Show Notes OCF MINISTRY NEWS New hires; jobs still available on OCF team: While couples have stepped forward to fill open positions at USMA and USCGA on an interim basis, the application window at both West Point and the Coast Guard Academy is now extended to 31 October with an expected start date in the summer of 2025. Fall programs await at Spring Canyon and White Sulphur Springs: Jump-start your career transition with a weekend of interactive work, group discussions, and personal exercises, all facilitated by retired military leaders with over 200 years of...
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July 2024: Modeling biblical humility; Christian chaplain challenges; and OCF ministry news
OCF Crosspoint Podcast
Show Notes OCF MINISTRY NEWS OCF purchased a new staff home at Spring Canyon: To contribute to OCF's purchase of this house, . OCF is expanding efforts in ROTC ministry with a new job opening at The Citadel: To learn more about the Council’s approval of this opportunity and/or . July marks the halfway point of OCF’s conference center ministry: to learn more about programs and opportunities available later this summer and fall. The AMCF World Conference 2024 in Brazil is coming up: This transformative opportunity to connect with other military...
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June 2024, “Not wrong or right, just left or right”: Planning ahead for career transitions
OCF Crosspoint Podcast
Crosspoint Show Notes, June 2024: Today’s episode introduces a new format for the OCF Crosspoint podcast. Moving forward, each monthly episode will consist of three segments: OCF ministry news, an “Ask OCF” segment, and an interview with a guest about a particular topic or personal story. Read on for links and details from each of these three segments for June 2024. OCF MINISTRY NEWS Volunteers needed for Fort Knox CST ministry: If interested in leading small groups for cadets during summer training at Fort Knox, particularly in July, reach out to Bob...
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An OCF Milestone Moment: The Inaugural Global Town Hall
OCF Crosspoint Podcast
In this special episode of OCF Crosspoint, you’re going to hear audio from the inaugural OCF Global Town Hall, which was broadcasted live on 10 February from the new Home Office in Colorado Springs, Colo. The first voice that you’re going to hear is OCF Council President Col Dale Holland, USAF (Ret.). He and OCF’s CEO / Executive Director, Col Scott Fisher, USAF (Ret.), started by discussing the impactful journey and future visions for OCF. After their opening remarks, the remaining hour or so was used as a Q&A time. During the Q&A portion, you’ll also hear the voice of LTC...
info_outlineGot an idea for a guest or topic?
If you would like to share your own story, complete the form on OCF’s “Be a Guest” webpage. Alternatively, if you have an idea for a guest or topic I should consider for a future episode of the show, send an email to [email protected].
Show Notes:
In January 2023, Pensacola OCF hosted a one-day workshop to discuss sexual brokenness and unwanted sexual behaviors like pornography addiction and to introduce solutions for healing and wholeness. CAPT Brent & Nicole Breining, USN (Ret.), led sessions throughout that one-day workshop, and they join me today on the podcast as we begin a series of episodes focusing on similar topics.
Brent and Nicole share their story and the impact that porn had on their marriage in this episode, and their remaining three Crosspoint episodes will cover topics such as the nature of addiction, the shame cycle, and the neurochemistry of the brain.
Having reached a breaking point in their marriage in 2012 and recovered since then by God’s grace, Brent and Nicole talk about why that addiction placed such a strain on their marriage, how God worked through accountability partners in their healing process, and more. Above all, their desire is for listeners to understand there is hope and that God can restore anyone struggling with problematic sexual behaviors.
Brent retired from the Navy in 2017 after a distinguished 27-year career, and he currently serves as a Foursquare Institutional Chaplain with Pure Desire Ministries, through which he helps men walk in sexual purity and break free from unwanted sexual behaviors.
Nicole received a Bachelor of Science in biochemistry from the University of Illinois and a Doctor of Pharmacy from the University of Illinois at Chicago, going on to work as a hospital pharmacist for 25 years. Nicole also has been working with Pure Desire Ministries, leading their betrayal and beyond groups for spouses for about three years. Both Brent and Nicole are accredited pastoral professionals.
As you listen to this conversation with Brent and Nicole, here are a few questions to ponder in your personal time, with a small group, or with a mentor:
- How can the church establish a culture of grace, especially as applies to this topic of addiction?
- Brent refers to Ephesians 5:25, which says “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” How does this verse shape your view of emotional intimacy in marriage?
- Brent talks about the iPhone’s contribution to an increased accessibility to pornography in recent years. What steps can you take to ensure your own devices aren’t contributing to addictive behaviors?
- How does our freedom in Christ set us free from the shame of our secrets?
- Nicole talks about realizing her husband’s struggles with pornography prompted her to react in sin as well. If you’ve been hurt by someone else’s sin, what’s the value of not using their sin as license to sin in response?
- If you’re struggling with addictive behaviors, sexual or otherwise, what positive habits can you establish to replace those behaviors?
- Why is assessing your heart posture in all things so critical?
Loads of Resources on this topic
Problematic Sexual Behavior (Men):
Books:
Laaser, M. (2004). Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction (3rd ed.). Zondervan.
Roberts, T. (2008). Pure Desire: How one man’s triumph can help others break free from sexual temptation. Regal.
Roberts, T. (2021). Seven Pillars of Freedom (5th ed.). Pure Desire Ministries International.
Stringer, J. (2018). Unwanted: How sexual brokenness reveals our way to healing. NavPress.
Podcasts: https://puredesire.org/podcasts/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2021, January 19). What If My Betrayed Spouse Doesn’t Want
Healing? (No. 185) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/what-if-my-betrayed-spouse-doesnt-want-healing/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2022, March 8). How To Help Your Spouse Heal From Your
Sexual Betrayal (No. 244) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/how-to-help-your-spouse-heal-from-your-sexual-betrayal/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2022, November 22). The Impact of Sexual Addiction w/ Dr.
Adrian Hickmon (No. 281) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/the-impact-of-sexual-addiction-w-adrian-hickmon/
Video Series:
Kolb, H. [Editor]. (2020). Sexual Integrity 101 [Video series]. Pure Desire Ministries International.
Ward, G., Wiles, J., & Wiles, T. [Executive Producers]. (2013). Conqueror Series: The battle plan for purity [Video series]. KingdomWorks Studios.
Problematic Sexual Behavior (Women):
Books:
Kolb, H. [Editor]. (2019). Unraveled: Managing love, sex, and relationships. Pure Desire Ministries International.
Stringer, J. (2018). Unwanted: How sexual brokenness reveals our way to healing. NavPress.
Podcasts: https://puredesire.org/podcasts/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2020, October 20). The Female Addict and Unraveled (No.
172) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/the-female-addict-unraveled/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2021, January 19). What If My Betrayed Spouse Doesn’t Want
Healing? (No. 185) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/what-if-my-betrayed-spouse-doesnt-want-healing/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2022, March 8). How To Help Your Spouse Heal From Your
Sexual Betrayal (No. 244) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/how-to-help-your-spouse-heal-from-your-sexual-betrayal/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2022, November 22). The Impact of Sexual Addiction w/ Dr.
Adrian Hickmon (No. 281) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/the-impact-of-sexual-addiction-w-adrian-hickmon/
Video Series:
Kolb, H. [Editor]. (2020). Sexual Integrity 101 [Video series]. Pure Desire Ministries International.
Betrayal Trauma:
Books:
Kolb, H., Jameson, A., & Roberts, D. (2022). Betrayal & Beyond: Healing the trauma of sexual
betrayal (3rd ed.). Pure Desire Ministries International.
Pure Desire Ministries. 7 Keys to Understanding Betrayal Trauma (ebook). https://puredesire.org/free-ebook-7-keys-to-understanding-betrayal-trauma/
Steffens, B. & Means, M. (2021). Your Sexually Addicted Spouse: How Partners Can Cope and
Heal (2nd ed.). Armin Lear Press Inc.
Podcasts: https://puredesire.org/podcasts/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2020, November 3). Boundaries in Recovery (No. 174) [Audio
podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast.
https://puredesire.org/podcasts/boundaries-in-recovery/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2021, May 11). What If My Struggling Spouse Doesn’t Want
Healing? (No. 201) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/what-if-my-struggling-spouse-doesnt-want-healing/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2021, July 13). Hope for Betrayed Men (No. 210) [Audio
podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast.
https://puredesire.org/podcasts/hope-for-betrayed-men/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2021, July 27). 7 Keys to Understanding Betrayal Trauma (No.
212) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/7-keys-to-understanding-betrayal-trauma/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2022, February 1). Women’s Takeover #1: Healing From
Betrayal w/ Dr. Barbara Steffens (No. 239) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire
Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/womens-takeover-1-healing-from-betrayal-w-dr-barbara-steffens/
Healthy Sexuality:
Books:
Gregoire, S. (2022). The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex (2nd ed.). Zondervan Books.
Gregoire, S. & Gregoire, K. (2022). The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex. Zondervan Books.
Roberts, T. & Roberts, D. (2010). Sexy Christians: The Purpose, Power and Passion of Biblical Intimacy. Baker Books.
Slattery, J. (2018). Rethinking Sexuality: God’s Design and Why It Matters. Multnomah.
Podcasts: https://puredesire.org/podcasts/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2019, July 9). Soul Ties (No. 105) [Audio podcast episode]. In
Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/soul-ties/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2019, July 30). Sexual Discipleship w/ Juli Slattery (No. 108)
[Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/sexual-discipleship-w-juli-slattery/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2022, April 26). The Good Guide to Great Sex w/ Dr. Keith and
Sheila Wray Gregoire (No. 251) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/the-good-guide-to-great-sex-w-dr-keith-sheil-wray-gregoire/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2022, November 1). The Four Pillars of Sexual Love w/ Dr. Juli
Slattery (No. 278) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/the-four-pillars-of-sexual-love-w-dr-juli-slattery/
Young Adults/College Age:
Books (Young Men):
Bennett, B., Butcher, B., & Roberts, T. (2016). Living Free. Pure Desire Ministries International.
Books (Young Women):
Bradley R. & Roberts, D. (2012). Behind the Mask: Authentic living for young women. Pure Desire Ministries International.
Podcasts: https://puredesire.org/podcasts/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2018, January 30). Living Free w/Ben Bennett (No. 30) [Audio
podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcast/living-free/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2019, September 17). Love, Sex, and Dating (No. 115) [Audio
podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast.
https://puredesire.org/podcasts/love-sex-and-dating/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2020, March 31). Getting Healthy Before Marriage w/ Drew
Boa (No. 143) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast.
https://puredesire.org/podcasts/getting-healthy-before-marriage-w-drew-boa/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2021, January 12). Groups for Young Women (No. 184) [Audio
podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast.
https://puredesire.org/podcast/groups-for-young-women/
Parents:
Books:
Roberts, B. & Kolb, H. (2018). Digital Natives: Raising an Online Generation. Pure Desire Ministries International.
Wright, R. & Wright, T. (2020). How to Talk with Your Kids About Sex. Pure Desire Ministries International.
Podcasts: https://puredesire.org/podcasts/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2019, August 13). What Parents Need to Know about Porn
(No. 110) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/what-parents-need-to-know-about-porn/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2021, August 3). The Effects of Pornography w/ Josh
McDowell (No. 213) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/the-effects-of-pornography-w-josh-mcdowell/
Pastors/Chaplains/Churches:
Books:
Laaser, M. (2004). Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction (3rd ed.). Zondervan.
Roberts, T. (2008). Pure Desire: How one man’s triumph can help others break free from sexual temptation. Regal.
Stumbo, N. (2017). Safe: Creating a Culture of Grace in a Climate of Shame. Pure Desire
Ministries International.
Podcasts: https://puredesire.org/podcasts/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2021, August 3). The Effects of Pornography w/ Josh
McDowell (No. 213) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast. https://puredesire.org/podcasts/the-effects-of-pornography-w-josh-mcdowell/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2020, October 27). No Shame Churches (No. 173) [Audio
podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast.
https://puredesire.org/podcasts/no-shame-churches/
Singles:
Books:
Gregoire, S. (2022). The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex (2nd ed.). Zondervan Books.
Gregoire, S. & Gregoire, K. (2022). The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex. Zondervan Books.
Slattery, J. (2018). Rethinking Sexuality: God’s Design and Why It Matters. Multnomah.
Podcasts: https://puredesire.org/podcasts/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2019, September 17). Love, Sex, and Dating (No. 115) [Audio
podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast.
https://puredesire.org/podcasts/love-sex-and-dating/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2020, March 31). Getting Healthy Before Marriage w/ Drew
Boa (No. 143) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast.
https://puredesire.org/podcasts/getting-healthy-before-marriage-w-drew-boa/
Stumbo, N. & Winsor, T. (Hosts). (2022, July 26). Unmet Longings & Unhealthy Behaviors w/
Ben Bennett (No. 264) [Audio podcast episode]. In Pure Desire Podcast.
https://puredesire.org/podcasts/unmet-longings-unhealthy-behaviors-w-ben-bennett/
Miscellaneous:
Books on Trauma:
Falk, K. & Goldberg, J. (2018). Struggle Well: Thriving in the Aftermath of Trauma. Lioncrest.
Van Der Kolk, B. (2014). The Body Keeps the Score. Penguin Books.
Websites:
Association of Partners of Sex Addicts Trauma Specialists: https://www.apsats.org/
Authentic Intimacy: https://www.authenticintimacy.com/
Pure Desire Ministries International: https://puredesire.org.