#423 Healing Emotional Scars

Healing Emotional Scars

Because you can

Have you ever found yourself stuck in the echoes of past pain, wondering if you’re truly healing or just coping? In this episode, I’ll unpack the difference between carrying emotional scars and genuinely healing from them.

Together, we’ll explore how our unconscious mind—the part of us that’s always working in the background—signals the need for healing and how we can respond. Think of emotional scars like physical ones: they’re reminders of what we’ve been through, but they don’t have to define us. I’ll share personal stories and practical steps I’ve used to move from pain toward genuine healing.

You’ll discover how to tell if your emotional wounds are still raw and how to guide yourself through the healing process. Whether it’s through self-reflection, creative self-therapy, or reaching out for professional support, you’ll learn ways to support your journey back to emotional wholeness.

This isn’t just for therapists—it’s for anyone ready to face their past and take steps toward a brighter future. Let’s tap into the wisdom of your unconscious mind, learn to listen to its messages, and use them to build a life of growth, self-compassion, and empowerment.

So, take a moment, tune in, and let’s explore this path together. Because healing isn’t just possible—it’s inevitable when we take the first step.

Please enjoy and share: https://personaldevelopmentunplugged.com/423-healing-emotional-scars/

Shine brightly,

Paul

Shine Brightly 🌟

Paul

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Music Credits

Music by Wataboi, DreamHeaven, ccjmusic, and others from Pixabay.

 

And the transcript WARNING if you're a lover of the written word this may make you frustrated, or angry - you have been warned - is it an 'ism

Spot the difference and how to heal emotional scars in this podcast

 

Healing emotional scars. What's all this about? Well, I start off with spot the difference and then I'll tell you stuff about healing physically, which is weird. And then we spot the difference and why the difference and how to get help and how to heal emotional scars. Okay, have a listen if that interests you. I'm sure it will

 

 

See if you can spot the difference between these two statements

 

welcome back to the longer podcast. And this one, well, I want you to spot the difference. See if you can spot what is the difference between these two statements. You know, when I think of that time, it was that shit time, it was black and it did, hurt. Do you know what? I was a mess then. I Want to tell you what that is shortly. Think of this one, see if you can spot the difference. Every time I think of that time, do you know what? It still hurts. Maybe not as much, but I still get those negative feelings. I still see those things and it's like I'm still living some of it again. Did you spot it? Did you spot it? Gonna come back to the difference in a minute because I want. Well, here's the thing, you see, let's get into the biological state. What are you talking about, Cloughie? Look, if you cut yourself, even maybe only a scratch, you don't even think about it, do you? You don't give it a second thought. You might give it a little rub and go, ow, that hurt. But in your mind, you know you're going to heal. So a scratch might stick a little plaster on it. But I do know it's gonna heal. You don't have a second thought. You don't actually think, I guess I'm gonna heal. Cause you just know it. You've got that understanding that you know your body's gonna heal itself. And if it's a deeper cut now, you may have needed help, maybe there was some medication, maybe there's some stitches, maybe even an operation. And those deeper cuts, they tend to leave a scar, don't they? A little physical scar. That to me that scar is a reminder. Reminder how serious. I say that again, A reminder how serious it was. You see, both of those times, your unconscious mind is what I believe anyway, got into its healing mode and healed you. Some people might say, well, it's just a body doing it. But I think your unconscious mind is there to serve you, to Keep you safe and keep you healthy. And it just heals you. So whether it's just a little scratch, whether it sometimes needs a little bit of help, but it still heals, but leaves that little, little scar. But then on the other hand, before the scar happens and maybe before the full healing has taken place, you get a little scab, don't you? And to me, that scab tells you to be gentle, to be careful. Healing is in process. And, you can help because it tells you and it's sometimes a little bit sore, a little bit painful. Tells you to help yourself by being aware, to protect yourself. Don't do nothing silly. Just be careful and, look after yourself while you're healing. That's what I think. So going back to those two statements, did you spot the difference? See, both of them were me. Both of them were me. See, the second one was I'm still feeling it. That was during the middle of ituse. As I think about it then it still hurts. Maybe not as much, but I can still feel it. I can still feel it in my gut. Sometimes I think I'm living it again. And you see, to me that's like the scab. Cause I'm not in that issue anymore. I've got out of it. And we do, by the way, we always get out of those issues. Think back of, the times when you thought, well, darkest at that time, my darkest time, I didn't think I was gonna get out of it, but here I am years later. But that was a scab saying, you're still feeling pain, but this time it's emotional pain. And you're feeling emotional pain from those past events. But it is an event in the past. It's not happening now, but you're still feeling a little bit of it as if it's in the present. Which means healing is still required. Healing is maybe still going on. And at that time, when it was like that, that healing came in the form of me asking questions. And one of the questions was, instead of, why is it always happening to me? How deep can I go? How horrible it feels? Because that was when I was in the bloody thing. And when I got out of that part, I asked my question, well, what the bloody hell can I do to get out of this? What can I do? And something inside me said, you're, bloody therapist Cloughie. Be your own therapist. And I did. I did loads of stuff. And I also narrated my path and narrated. I just recorded what I did. What best advice would I give myself? I initially Narrated it as being my therapist or being a therapist to my best mate. And I got it printed out. It's in the book. And I showed it to this writer who was a client of mine, said, I know I shouldn't do this, but would you just have a little look at it? And they did. They're so kind. And they came back and said, it's so bloody obvious it's you. Why didn't you be brave? Be brave and write it as you? And I did. It took me hours taking, the you to me and all that stuff to make it into to me. But I did, and it felt so good. And I created processes that help other people. Now some of those processes I actually took into trainings to help loads of people.

 

 

Paul says negative emotions are signals from unconscious mind that you need help

 

So there was good to come out of that. But it was things that I knew that worked then because I'd tried them on myself bit by bit. But I'm a therapist. I've done a lot of trainings. And, that's what I did. I know you might be saying, yeah, Paul, but I'm not a therapist. I'll get to that. I will get to that, I promise you. But that was because I was in it. It was still the scab. I was still roar. And I had to be gentle. I had to be careful. Not careful, but just careful. Be kind careful. I think not expecting too much, but not expecting too little either. But. But let's go back to the first. You know, when I think of that time, that was a shit time. It was black. It did hur. You know, was m. I was a real, real mess. I was a real mess. You know, I used to cry suddenly. Just break down, fall on the floor and cry. That's how bad I was. You sp. The difference there, you see this one was. That was me now, by the way. That is me now. Because it was horrible then. It doesn't affect me anymore because it's in the past. I've dealt with it. I've learned from it. I've learned what I needed to learn. So those emotions, are no longer needed to remind me that I still need to do work. And that's what I think these negative emotions are there. They're really a signal from your unconscious mind saying, I'm waving a flag at you. Do some work. We've still got work to do. Still got toa. Let go. Some maybe limiting beliefs. Let's do some work, find help. It's like a cry for help, I guess, from the inside, saying, you know, you're still there. You're still in it. But this wasn't, this was. It's okay, it's gone. Because it was then back then in the past. And that's what I listen to. when my clients, when I do work with them, they come in and they go o, I feel so bad, Paul. I'm feeling this anxiety and it gives me this type of feeling. I get this pain in my stomach, I can't think. It's right in the present moment they're talking of their problem in the present moment they're in it. And then we do some work and I'm going get that feeling back again. This is at the end by the way. Get that old feeling back again. You run what you said in your stomach, in your gut. And they all said, well, can't at the moment, it's gone. Said you got it pretty easily an hour ago yeah. it's gone now. So we'll just tell, talk about they. Yeah, because I remember it used to be so bad back then. We'd gone back to the past tense. They've moved on still maybe a scar just to remind them. You see that scar to some extent going back to the natural healing is you talking in the past tense to say that's how bad it was. You've learn, you've moved on. Let's see how strong you are now. And if it happens again, something like that, you know you can deal with it because you've got that little scar to remind you. But it's in the past. That scar is saying it was a deep cut back then, but not now.

 

 

Cloughie suggests you talk about negative times in your past

 

So what I'm going to ask you to do or what I'm suggesting, you just notice how you talk about the negative times in your past and it's not just talk out loud, it's how you think. How do you think about those times in the past? Because when you think about do you go back into them and feel it again? Or when you talk to your friends, you're talking in the present tense as if it's still there. Maybe not as much, but it's still there. can you still feel that feeling? Because I'd know the feeling that I had back then if I was feeling it now. Swore I would really feel it. Even a tinge of it would not be good. But it doesn't affect me anyore at all now. So I'm really grateful for my unconscious mind guiding me to be my own therapists and the stuff I'd learned and what I've done. But I know you're not a therapist, but you might be. You might be. And if you are, well, you might ask inside is that that the thing to do? But if you can really still feel them, feel those negative emotions, if you're living your life with that limiting belief, your unconscious mind is waving that flag. You haven't healed yet. So get some help. Now where would I go to get some help? I went to a therapist to nearly swore again. A really, really good one me. But I'm not asking you to come to me. You could, but you could ask. But the thing is find help. 1, 2, 1 help that is you with a therapist. A therapist who I would suggest would be a master hypnotist. Bloody good hypnotist. But with the skills of a master practitioner ###lp and the skills of a master practitioner of timeline therapy. They could just be practitioners by the way because practitioners are really good master practition just taking it to another level. They're most probably more professional I say more professional in the muches they do it as a profession therefore they're doing it all the time and they're honing their skills. But I did a lot of work when I was a practitioner and I did a lot of good work when I was a practitioner. Master practitioner just did the to down the edges as it were but I was going on for other things. So one to one and you know some way back, some way back I don't know how far this years back I did an episode which says what I think it's lot what to look for in a therapist. So you could google that or look down my if you go on the website personal development unplugged um.com do I think there's a search button there and you can look for that. It's always good. Might do it again sometime or you might think well it's not that bad Cloughie. It's not that bad that it is. I'm still really feeling it as if it is in the present but I'm sort of feeling it. Well you could maybe go on to some some programs. I've got a great program which I say it's great. It's just me saying supreme iner confidence and that's really a bigg up the name. But it's all about taking away the anxiety and coming back to inner confidence. It's really supreme inner confidence. Confidence in yourself. That's a lovely program. And you got discount if you sign up to the hypnosis programs which tells me You've also got hypnosis programs. I've got 6yd and, they're all complimentary. They're free. My son, Joseph Clough, has hundreds, thousands, probably most of those can be sought out free of at a very small price. So you could just go down and choose them and pick the one that you feel most comfortable with, the one that goes. Do you know what? That resonates with me. But set your intention first. Before you listen to any of those programs. Before you listen to any of the hypnosis programs, set your intention. I'm gonna get rid of this. That's my intention. I am gonna get rid of these feelings. I'm gonna learn what I need to learn and move on. And then you press play. Or there's another alternative. You can email me [email protected]. email me. Give me a little bit of the problem. How you feel now and how you want to feel. That's all I want. I don't want the ifs and butts and everything around it. So I'm not a counselr. I just want to know how you're doing, what you're doing now, the negative side. So I feel this. I think this affects me in this way. And then, well, how do inna be? And I wa want to be this, this and this. And I'll come up with a process, or I'll guide you to a hypnosis track, or I'll guide you to a program, or I'll probably do all of those and produce an episode just for you. But it won't be just for you. Cause it'll be for me and it'll be for everyone elseus. We'll all get something from them. So'so many different ways you can find help. But first of all, I think you need to recognize how you're thinking, how you're talking about negative times in the past. Is it a scar or is it a scab that still needs help and healing? So think, about that. Just a thought. Well, it's a big thought, I guess. And you see, the simple thing to remember is it's your unconscious mind telling you there's still just a little bit more to do. And, isn't that kind? Isn't that kind? All you have to do is then listen. You're getting those feelings. And you listen, ask questions. How can I help myself? How can I help you? What do I need to do? How can I change this? So there you go. There's a pause.

 

 

J: Sharing is good. Can only do you good. I know every episode doesn't always resonate

 

Thereuse I was thinking a minute because what I didn't realise see I might make a few notes. Not a script, but there's a few can tell it's not a script. I tell it and. But I didn't realize when I was talking about this or writing them few notes that this is all about me. It's all about me and how far I'd come. And I guess this is my unconscious mind, my best friend letting me know how far I'd come, how far we'd come and how far we'll let it go. Isn't that kind? And in my nose I just said thank you. And a little smiley face with a kiss because that's what I do with my aunt. Go just mind smiley face with a kiss. And it's your conscience. I say that again because I don't know what happened. Then it's your unconscious mind, your best friend telling you, guiding you, supporting you forever. So do listen, please just listen. If there's things going on, just listen to whatever you get. Sometimes it'll be a memory, sometimes it will be a word on the tip of your tongue. It's not always a conversation. Could be when you're writing in your journal. If you don't journal, suggest having a little go. Maybe we'll talk about that another session, another, another episode. But one of the things I found out about doing this even though I haven't told you what happened, the way it felt and the way it feels now, it doesn't feel now for me makes me understand that sharing is good. Sharing is good. Just to know that we all move on, we can all do this together. So things are good to know. And if you know things that are good, share them. If they aren't taken on board by the people, doesn't matter. It'll go in sometime, always does. I know every episode is a work of art. No I don't. I know every episode doesn't always resonate, not with everyone. But I do know a little bit of RePet say blind mate my words. Repetition is not only the mother of skill but also goes in when you're ready. You suddenly notice those golden nuggets and you pick them up and run with them. Not run off with them, but run with them. As so in that tenuous sort of link. It'be good to share this too. I think if you just share the episode because people don't tell you when they're hurting, they can show you sometimes in their call it non verbal communication, their body language. I don't think it's a body language, but it's a. They're communicating with you. So it's the language of a kind. You know, if they're a little bit distant, maybe they're not their old selves or the old self that you remember, or you see a difference between one and the other. May just want to point out, hey, this might be interesting. It might be. It's only half an hour. Can only do you good. J, if you would. I think it would be kind to share. And I say if you want to email me about anything, please do. I'll come up with something for you. Always have, always will. It's what I'm good at, I think. So please, please get my old grey matter moving for me. It's good for me, too. Okay. Have fun. And if you do trip over that subscribe button, pick it up and give you a price, will you?

 

 

Paul Clough: It's time to fly on your own

 

All right, my friend, have more fun than you can stand and let's move on, creating the life that we both deserve. Time to fly. Bye now. Warning. You are now leaving the unplugged mind of Paul Clough. It's time to fly on your own. Be brave, my friend. Personal development unplugged.

Personal development [self improvement] [self development] [NLP] [Hypnosis]