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FMQ 506 A Respectful Look at the Views Of Others

Anxiety to Confidence - The Personal Development Unplugged Podcast

Release Date: 07/29/2025

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A Respectful Look at the Views of Others

A Five-Minute Quickie from the Personal Development Unplugged Podcast Ever wondered how someone can hold a belief so different from yours — even the total opposite — and still be right? Well, in this five-minute (ish!) ramble, we explore one of NLP’s most important presuppositions: respect for another person’s model of the world. We all build our own "maps" of reality based on our experiences. But what happens when we genuinely listen to someone else's? Can we learn from it? Can it balance, challenge, or even evolve our own beliefs? In this episode:

  • Why no one’s map is 100% the territory
  • How curiosity leads to harmony (and less conflict)
  • And why active listening could be your secret growth tool

Take a moment, a breath, a coffee — and muse with me. Test everything. Respect difference. Be curious. Want the full experience? Subscribe, follow, and share the hell out of this with someone open-minded like you!

https://personaldevelopmentunplugged.com/fmq-506-a-respectful-look-at-the-views-of-others

And the video link https://youtu.be/yE9FVIl3nyo More fun than you can stand — wallow in curiosity! Shine Brightly 🌟 Paul


Hey there! I’d love to hear from you—questions, feedback, requests—all welcome. Drop me a line or leave a comment. If you've enjoyed this episode or any other, please share and subscribe! You can reach me at feedback@personaldevelopmentunplugged.com.


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Follow me on Twitter: @pcloughie Remember: I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. This podcast and any of my online resources are for educational purposes only. Never use the hypnosis tracks or exercises if you're operating machinery, driving, or if you have epilepsy or psychiatric conditions. Always consult a healthcare provider if you're unsure.


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Music Credits

Music by Wataboi, DreamHeaven, ccjmusic, and others from Pixabay.  

 

And the transcript WARNING if you're a lover of the written word this may make you frustrated, or angry - you have been warned - is it an 'ism

 

 Hey. A little while ago we did a couple of five minute quickies about the, well, the convenient assumptions or presuppositions of NLP.

 

And I wanted to, just for five minutes, to muse about another one, another one. And it's all about respect. Respect for the other person's model of the world.

 

Because I don't know if you know that we all have our own models of the world and we all have our own maps. And someone said, you know, the map is not the territory. So if the map is not the territory and it's our map, but we're not really looking outside to find out what territory is, lovely metaphor, isn't it? But our world is, our world is a map.

 

And we believe it's true, don't we? Everything that we believe must be right because we believe it. And guess what? Other people have different beliefs. Sometimes a bloody opposite.

 

How is that? Because lots of things have happened in the past, their experiences, their backgrounds, their parents, everything you can think of has conspired with them to create beliefs and the choices they make in the world, which gives them more beliefs. And guess what, so have you. And you've formed this thing called a map, which may be right in some places, maybe not quite so right on others, but also there's a whole territory out there, which is constantly changing.

 

And if you think of this modern world right now, everything is changing so quickly too. And we're being overwhelmed by so much information, but also a lot of false information. So it's really distorting everything.

 

So how can our little map of the territory be right? But what we have to do, I think, is in order to get clearer, maybe other people's map, their territory, their, as we call it, model of the world, has something in it that we could learn from. Because there's always two sides of every slice of bread. See, there's something, but there's always two sides, isn't there? And maybe one side is buttered more than the other one is jammed.

 

I'm not quite sure where that metaphor went. But it's all about really just listening, I guess, listening to other people, their dialogue, what they're saying, what their beliefs are, and then just matching them with yours and seeing how something changed. Because you can change beliefs in an instant.

 

If something comes to you and you go, ah, I've seen it, I've done it, something has changed. All of a sudden, I never used to be able to do something. And you believe, ah, I could never do that.

 

And now you've tried it. And now you become skillful and a master at it. And everything changes.

 

And your belief about what you're capable of doing will always change. So I think this is great to have respect for other people's model of the world. So you can then go, oh, I wonder where that came from.

 

What did they know? Or what did they experience that I didn't to come to that conclusion? And it gives you, I don't like the word balanced, but I'm going to use it. You might be able to get a more balanced view, but you'll get the harmony of finding out what the blue in hell is going on in the world. Just listening to opposing views, as it were, gives you something to think about.

 

Especially if you can keep that respect by saying, well, you honestly hold that view. I wonder where it came from. Is there something in that that I'm not seeing or that I don't understand? And then you can ask questions and they can ask questions of you.

 

That's what I'd love to have happen. The moment in this world, you seem to be either right or left or this or extreme and that, which is, it's not right, is it? No one is always right. No one is perfectly right because there's no perfect thing.

 

And it's all about the context. But in this world of personal development and the things that we're learning, even different things that we're learning, is to call that a model of the world. And where did that model, how was that model formed? How was it created? And is it something I can take on board? And it's all about having respect for other people, I guess, and where their views came from.

 

And having an open mind, an open mind to listen, be an active listener. And then take time, as I love to do here in this five-minute quickie, to muse, to consider. So take it away and go, do you know what? I'm having a cup of coffee, a glass of water, my gin and tea, my frozen vodka, all that stuff.

 

Maybe just sitting down for five minutes and going, I wonder where that view came from. Could I learn something from it? Even if it reinforces my view, but at least I've listened. And that's what I'd love you to do with this podcast.

 

The longer podcasts, have a listen and really see if they gel with you. Does it work? Test the hell out of the processes that I share with you. I know they work, but they have to work for you.

 

And if they don't work for you, let me know, because then I can do something about it. I can mold them to whatever you need. But, you know, take nothing on face value, but look for the golden nuggets.

 

So that was a wonderful ramble, Cluffy. Yeah, a wonderful ramble for more than five minutes on a five-minute quickie to get you to think about things differently. Have fun and muse.

 

Didn't make sense at all, did it? But hey, something will have gone in. Okay, I'll see you later. Bye-bye.

 

Before you go, my friend, I'd like to ask you a question. Did you learn something from this, this episode? I hope you did, because even though every episode may not be the one that really floats your boat, sets you, you know, alight. Hopefully there's a takeaway in each and every episode for you.

 

And I'd love to know what it was. So please do email me at feedback at personaldevelopmentunplugged.com. It's a personal email to me. I'd love to know so we can carry on doing this work that will allow you to exceed your dreams.

 

And what's the payment for this? Payment, Cloughie? What are you talking about payment? I thought it was free. Well, it's like pay it forward. And if you could pay this forward in two ways, or maybe three, first way is please share it.

 

Share this podcast with as many people as you could. And you can. It's very easy.

 

Just press that share button. Send it off by email to them. You'd love to, this is something you might like, might get that right, Paul.

 

Something you might enjoy. And hey, if you could, a real big pay it forward to me is wherever you're getting this podcast, is it iTunes, Castbox, or Stitcher, or whichever you're getting from, Google Play, I don't know. Would you please just leave a review? Because the review really helps people find this podcast.

 

There's thousands out there. And we want to, or I want to direct people to this podcast. And the way to do it is by reviews.

 

So if you could do that, if you could share, you can do that. And also just make sure that you're subscribed. So you get this episode and every other episode on a Wednesday and a Saturday.

 

If you do all of that, my little heart will sing. And if you want me to sing, well, you'll have to wait and see. Enjoy.

 

But please do, do all of that. Make my heart sing. Bye-bye now.

 

Warning, you are now leaving the unplugged mind of Paul Clough. It's time to fly now. Be brave, my friend.

 

Personal development unplugged.

Personal development [self improvement] [self development] [NLP] [Hypnosis]