147 - 3 statements that we HATE hearing from people in early recovery
Release Date: 07/09/2020
Real Recovery Talk
Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? Join Our FREE WEBINAR! Does your new sober life seem to be boring and mundane? Are you having a hard time finding purpose? This is an episode that you dont want to miss! Join our Big Book Study! Tom IG: Ben IG: RRT IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkpodcast/
info_outlineReal Recovery Talk
Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? Join Our FREE WEBINAR! What does it actually take to stay sober for the first 90 days? In this episode, we break down a simple, practical framework for alcoholics and drug addicts who want real stability — not just white-knuckling it. We also speak directly to families and loved ones, sharing clear benchmarks that help you tell the difference between real progress and empty promises. If you or someone you love is early in recovery, this episode gives you tangible actions you can start today and clarity on what healthy...
info_outlineReal Recovery Talk
Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? Join Our FREE WEBINAR! Join our SKOOL Group: Join our Big Book Study! Tom IG: Ben IG: RRT IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkpodcast/
info_outlineReal Recovery Talk
Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? Join Our FREE WEBINAR! Have you ever walked away from a conversation feeling guilty, confused, or responsible for someone else’s choices? You’re not imagining it — and you’re not weak. In this episode of Real Recovery Talk, I break down 4 manipulation tactics addicts commonly use against the people who love them most. These patterns are subtle, emotionally charged, and incredibly effective — especially on parents, spouses, and family members who just want to help. I’ve been on both sides of this. I used these tactics...
info_outlineReal Recovery Talk
Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? As we head into a brand new year, many family members and loved ones are carrying a mix of hope, exhaustion, and uncertainty — especially when someone they love is struggling with addiction. This video is not about resolutions. It’s not about fixing anyone. And it’s not about doing more. In this episode, I share a few simple intentions you can carry into 2026 — practical, grounded ways to protect your own well-being, strengthen connection, and walk into the new year with clarity instead of fear. Join our SKOOL...
info_outlineReal Recovery Talk
Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? If it’s Christmas Eve and you’re lying awake right now, worried about your child, this episode is for you. While the rest of the world seems to be celebrating, many parents are quietly carrying fear, guilt, and exhaustion—wondering where their son or daughter is, if they’re safe, or if things will ever change. In this solo episode, I speak directly to parents who are struggling tonight. We talk about why Christmas Eve can feel heavier than any other night, the lies fear tells us when things get quiet, and what...
info_outlineReal Recovery Talk
Have someone in your life struggling with addiction? DO NOT MISS THIS! Free webclass: 5 MISTAKES FAMILIES MAKE WHEN TRYING TO HELP A LOVED ONE STRUGGLING WITH ADDICTION In this powerful episode of Real Recovery Talk, we sit down with Ricki Santiago, a licensed clinician who opens up about his own experience growing up with an alcoholic mother—and how that trauma shaped his entire life. Before he was a therapist helping others heal… he was a kid watching his mom drink herself into the grave. Join our SKOOL Group: Join our Big Book Study! Tom IG: Ben IG: RRT IG:...
info_outlineReal Recovery Talk
Have someone in your life struggling with addiction? DO NOT MISS THIS! Free webclass: 5 MISTAKES FAMILIES MAKE WHEN TRYING TO HELP A LOVED ONE STRUGGLING WITH ADDICTION In today’s episode, we break down the difference between true narcissism and the narcissistic behaviors that show up during addiction. These can look identical — manipulation, gaslighting, lack of empathy, emotional abuse — but the root cause is often very different. Join our SKOOL Group: Join our Big Book Study! Tom IG: Ben IG: RRT IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkpodcast/
info_outlineReal Recovery Talk
Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? Join Our FREE WEBINAR! In today’s conversation, Hilary shares one of the most powerful trauma stories we’ve ever had on the podcast. Before addiction ever entered her life, trauma did. From growing up in chaos… to being pushed into acting at five years old… to living in fear, shame, and survival mode — her story explains EXACTLY why so many addicts and alcoholics struggle the way they do. Join our SKOOL Group: Join our Big Book Study! Tom IG: Ben IG: RRT IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkpodcast/
info_outlineReal Recovery Talk
Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? Join Our FREE WEBINAR! HAPPY THANKSGIVING! I wanted to come on and share my gratitude for ALL OF YOU! Join our SKOOL Group: Join our Big Book Study!
info_outlineIn today’s episode, Benjamin and I are going to talk about the “why” behind being an addict. Drinking and doing drugs is a cover for an underlying emotional issue that must be addressed to fully recover successfully.
Our clients, because of the choices they have made in the past, do not have the best behavior or comments when they are moving through the process of recovery. In today’s episode, Ben and I will talk about questions and feedback we hear from clients most often, and how we respond to their concerns.
If you’re in a treatment program, make sure to really focus on treatment so you can get better and move on with your life. Realize the recovery process, to be successful, take time. You may have been an addict for over a decade - spending two weeks in recovery will not give you enough time to recognize what you need to change.
Also, realize that you will need to not only be aware of the emotional issues that ended you up in recovery, but you’ll also need to process these emotions and be mindful of triggers that can lead to continuing your addictive behavior. It’s also easy to be in a mindset of not wanting to drink or do drugs, but that alone will not lead to a successful recovery.
We talk about the six legs of alcoholism, including consequences, which, in and of themselves, are not enough to give you a clean and sober life. Some clients want to get back to their family and responsibilities. However, we see clients that leave early as they have self-evaluated they are OK, they go home and continue their addiction.
Many times, you weren’t helping before you came to rehab, as your addiction came first. You were most likely stealing and being an emotional and spiritual burden to your loved ones. When you’re not ready to leave, you aren’t prepared to take care of someone else, let alone take care of yourself.
At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. We care about the success and safety of each and every one of our clients from the moment they step into our center to the future of their well-being.
Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery.
- Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!
Show Notes:
- [03:27] Why people come for treatment at Rock Recovery Center.
- [04:12] When our clients “don’t even feel like using anymore.”
- [08:19] Motivators and consequences for the addict.
- [11:17] Addicts saying they don’t want to drink or drug anymore is usually a precursor to a future negative event.
- [14:07] Unicorn addicts who can successfully complete the program in 30 days.
- [18:15] Treatment and sober living can take up to a year to recover.
- [19:49] “I just want to move on and put ‘this’ behind me.”
- [22:19] SMART goals and creating a new and healthy routine.
- [24:40] The difference between leaving and leaving when you are ready.
Episode Links and Resources