You Are Changing the World, with David LaMotte
Expat Family Connection
Sometimes we lose track of how we impact those around us. Recognizing our power to effect change can be very uplifting. David says, “Thinking you can fix the world is totally naive. But it's not naive to think you can change it. We change it all the time, whether we like it or not.” Then it’s up to us to know when and how to engage with others who hold vastly different viewpoints. In this episode we talk about Why so much patience is required when “returning” from abroad; How to know when others have the bandwidth to hear what we have to say; What a peaceful society...
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Re-Imagine Community, with Ivy Summer and Pare Gerou
Expat Family Connection
Do you like the idea of built-in community and connection combined with plenty of privacy? Do you wish your children had freedom to play outside and with neighborhood friends at any time? Do you want to retire in a country with low cost of living, gorgeous weather and deliciously fresh, healthy food? Then it's worth your time to learn more about Greek Village Cohousing. “It's really for anyone who is drawn to community. That's what it comes down to. If you have a desire to be in greater connection with other people and connection with the land, then cohousing is for you.” Learn What...
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Unlock Hidden Expectations, with Abby Williamson
Expat Family Connection
As TCKs (and adults) work through the complex issues of identity, place and belonging, it can be really hard to express what’s going on inside. We may need an expanded vocabulary. We may need permission to be outside of prescribed standards. “When we use creativity and tell our stories in creative ways, it opens up a different way of processing. It helps us to get past the expectations we have for ourselves.” In this episode we talk about How telling their own stories helps TCKs connect with others; Why practicing telling their own stories is important even for families who are great...
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Tips for Goodbyes
Expat Family Connection
Saying goodbye is unfortunately a staple of expat life. For me it’s the worst part of living abroad. I was recently asked, “Do you have any tips for a teen who resists saying goodbye?” Here’s my expanded answer. The tips I share here are relevant for adults as well as children, whether you’re the one leaving or staying. I talk about Being in denial; The normal process of disengaging; Honoring different styles; Prompts to help those who aren’t sure how or what to say; and more. RESOURCES mentioned in the episode: Check out the I’ve put together for you. Simple tips...
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Theatre Skills for Life, with Natasha Rekhi
Expat Family Connection
Theatre gives kids a chance to relax and express themselves -- and explore new ways of being -- outside the boundaries of classroom rules or societal expectations. “When they're in a very safe environment, like a theater class, they feel very relaxed because it's not like the general classroom environment. They also don't know what to expect, so it is a bit of a surprise. It's a safe place. It's a social place.” Theatre helps develop language and communication skills, resilience in stressful situations, and acceptance of people from different backgrounds. We also talk about Being...
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Craft Your Story with Purpose, with Christine Taylor
Expat Family Connection
Christine’s story of unresolved grief started in her teen years, but she didn’t start unpacking it until over 25 years later. Her story has come full circle, as she now helps women in transition tell their stories. She shares the power of knowing and telling her own story, and how stories help us connect with people. “I had really boxed it up and put it away and not looked at it for many, many, many years. Until I started to realize what an impact it had on me, and my ability to just be myself with people, and to talk to people and let them see me -- and allow me to see them.” We also...
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Reclaim Agency through Storytelling, with Kate Jetmore
Expat Family Connection
When we feel disoriented, such as when living in another culture, hearing stories from real people who’ve been through similar experiences has a stabilizing effect. Creating space for people to tell their stories is a powerful way we can give them agency. “Lending an ear is one of the most powerful gifts we can give to another person. And what we're giving to them is … power. So often it's another person who’s defining us. But when we can choose the words and share with the world who we are, what we've been through, at our own pace and in our own tone, we reclaim a sense of...
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Creating Life Mosaics
Expat Family Connection
Most of us could use a little help in telling our life stories, especially as our lives get further outside standard categories. This episode kicks off a series on storytelling, with a hands-on, easy activity I’ve developed, inspired by the artform of mosaics. It’s a way to look at all the good and bad, all the ugly and beautiful, a way to take all your “broken” pieces and mis-matched bits, and fit them together in a meaningful design. RESOURCES mentioned in the episode: for connection and social support RATHER READ? I’ve got you covered with a . ENJOYED THIS EPISODE? ...
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You're Invited to TCKCon
Expat Family Connection
This is a short message bringing you some updates, an invitation, and a story. All teen Third Culture Kids and their parents are invited to join a free conference. Socialize with other TCKs, learn from professional speakers, and have the chance to share your own experiences in this community building event. Also in this episode: what else I've been up to ways to connect a personal story that illustrates why I do this work. RESOURCES mentioned in the episode: TCKCon, a free conference for teen Third Culture Kids and their parents, via Zoom on April 24 from 10:30am-12:30pm EDT - If you...
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Love Your Life's Work, with Renata Andrade
Expat Family Connection
Did you know? Your job satisfaction (or dissatisfaction) can reveal deep patterns that might be holding you back. Figuring that out is a little like realizing you keep ending up with the same bad boyfriend time after time. Renata tells us why working on your resume is the absolute last part of the puzzle when looking for a job, shifting direction or starting your own thing. RESOURCES mentioned in the episode: - Join Renata February 8-12, 2021 12-week group program starts March 1 - with a special bonus for those who sign up by February 15. to start a conversation and find...
info_outlineI never talked to anyone about the nearly overwhelming, visceral longing that took over my quiet moments; I kind of assumed everyone felt the same intensity. Until I realized it was an expression of unresolved grief that had accumulated in my life.
“Clearly I’m someone who really needed the catharsis [of farewell events]. Because of my own unresolved grief, these goodbyes hit me probably harder than other people.”
What can we as parents do to help our Third Culture Kids (TCKs) - and ourselves - process grief so it doesn’t crop up again later?
In this episode I talk about
- My own story of unresolved grief,
- Why we need to engage in mourning,
- How we may go wrong with encouragement,
and more.
RESOURCES mentioned in the episode:
Effortless Family Connection Workshop
Third Culture Kids A Gift to Care For by Ulrika Ernvik
Drawn To A Story by Cath Brew: gifts and art for expats
Third Culture Kids Growing Up Among Worlds by David C. Pollock and Ruth E. Van Reken
Healing Your Grieving Heart for Teens: 100 Practical Ideas Simple tips for understanding and expressing your grief by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D.
RATHER READ? I’ve got you covered with a blog post and transcript.
ENJOYED THIS EPISODE?
- Take a screenshot and share it with your friends … tag @ResilientExpats.
- You might also like: Episode 5 - Stories & Memories, with Ulrika Ernvik
ABOUT YOUR HOST:
Kim Adams is an American raising three daughters along with her math-teaching husband of 20 years. She loves photography, reading, thunderstorms, walking on the beach, camping where there are no bugs, and has a weakness for mint chocolate chip ice cream.
To set up a conversation with Kim to learn how she can support you, go to ResilientExpats.com/Adapt and hit “Apply Now.”
CONNECT WITH KIM:
Workshop: Effortless Family Connection
Resilient Expats LLC website
Free Parents Community on Facebook
Apply Now for 1:1 Support to smooth your transitions & maximize your expat experience