212: Who Taught You To Be Quiet?
SayTheThings's podcast
In this episode, I explore something that sits underneath so much of our lives — our voice. Not the one we speak with, but the one that knows what we think, what we need, and what we will and won’t accept. I talk about how many of us didn’t lose that voice by accident — we were trained to silence it. We learned to edit ourselves, to keep the peace, to stay small. Today I start unpacking where that training came from and what it has cost us. This episode is an invitation to begin noticing it — without judgment — and to prepare for the work of finding that voice again.
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211: The Bridge Doesn't Wait
SayTheThings's podcast
I lost my best friend from high school this January. The bridge between us was always there — until it wasn't. That's what this episode is about. The conversations you've been meaning to have. The person you've been meaning to show up as. The things you've been meaning to say. Not someday. Now. Your practice this week: catch yourself once in the act of not saying the thing. Write it down. That's it. That's where we begin.
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210: One Small Reason: 5 Japanese Wisdoms for Building a Life You Love
SayTheThings's podcast
What if purpose isn’t something you discover once and hold onto forever? What if it’s something you discover in small ways — every single day? Over the last few episodes we’ve been talking about something many of us are missing: margin. Space in our lives and space in our nervous systems. Because we can’t build a life we love when every ounce of our energy is already spent holding the current one together. But once we create a little space, another question appears: Now what? In this episode I share five Japanese wisdoms that offer a gentler way to think about purpose, presence, and...
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209: I Forgot Who I Was. Turns Out, I Was Just Busy.
SayTheThings's podcast
When did you last have margin? Not a vacation, not a Sunday — real margin. Blank space that belonged to no one and nothing. Just you, unhurried and present. I'm guessing the answer is: not recently. In this episode I'm coming to you through four different lenses — the coach, the yogi, the nervous system researcher, and the grandmother — each one asking the same essential question in a different language: how did we get so busy building a life that we forgot to live one? This isn't about doing less. It's about getting curious about what the doing is protecting you from feeling. Because...
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208: Caring on Purpose: Your Cares Are Currency. Spend Them Wisely
SayTheThings's podcast
That flat, resigned Bohemian Rhapsody line — nothing really matters to me — caught in my throat at 14 and still does. What if it's actually permission? Permission to stop carrying what was never really yours and make space for what genuinely matters. That's the Care Budget. Yes, I made it up. This episode is about treating your energy like your finances — assessing where your cares are going and deciding if they deserve the investment. I share the moment I hit empty in Kansas City, why The Giving Tree is a cautionary tale for women who are really good at giving, and four questions to...
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207: From Foggy to Flowing: The Fix
SayTheThings's podcast
You're not depressed. You're not fine either. You're somewhere in the middle — and there's actually a name for it. In this episode, I'm unpacking why so many of us feel like we're watching our lives through a foggy windshield, and sharing one surprisingly simple shift that can wake you back up to yourself. We'll talk about what's really happening in your brain when you hit that sweet spot where time disappears and your inner critic finally shuts up — and how to get there more often, even in the margins of a very full life. This one's short, practical, and might just be the permission slip...
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206: Choosing Happiness, Taking Risks & Forgiving Yourself: Deathbed Wisdom (Part 2)
SayTheThings's podcast
Welcome to part two of our deathbed regrets series. Last week I covered the first four regrets—this week I'm finishing with the final six, and these might hit even harder because they're about living on autopilot, postponing joy, and holding grudges. Regret #5: Not choosing happiness. Happiness isn't something that happens to you—it's a daily decision. Regret #6: Not taking the risk. People don't regret what they tried and failed at—they regret what they never tried. Regret #7: Not prioritizing self-care. Not bubble baths—actual care. Meeting your needs, protecting...
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205: 4 Regrets You Can Avoid (Part 1)
SayTheThings's podcast
This week I'm covering the first four of ten deathbed regrets shared with hospice nurses—not to depress you, but to give you a roadmap while you still have time. Includes research from Blue Zones and the Framingham Heart Study on how connection and purpose add years to your life.
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204: Who Am I Now? Reclaiming Yourself After Decades of Being Everything to Everyone
SayTheThings's podcast
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" Mary Oliver's famous question might make your throat tighten. That's because most of us have never actually been asked that question - not in a way that expected an honest answer. Instead, we've spent decades answering different questions: "How are the kids?" "What does your husband need?" "Can you help with this?" Until one day, we wake up and realize we don't know who we are anymore. In this episode, we explore what happens when the roles that defined you - mother, wife, daughter, caregiver - shift or disappear. We...
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203: The F*cking First Time: Learning to Sit with Silence and What It Wants to Tell You
SayTheThings's podcast
Over the past nine weeks, you've done the work. You've set boundaries, clarified your values, and practiced giving yourself grace. But now you have something you might not have had in years: space. And if you're like me, that space can feel more uncomfortable than the chaos ever did. In this episode, I'm talking about what happens when we finally create room in our lives—and then don't know what to do with it. I introduce Brené Brown's concept of the FFT (the F*cking First Time) and why doing something new always feels awkward before it feels natural. I share a recent snow day that reminded...
info_outlineI used to be lightning-fast with my words—shutting down arguments before anyone could respond, winning every fight while losing connection. This week, we're getting honest about what we bring to conflict that makes it worse: unprocessed anger, the need to be right, defensiveness, or the ways we disguise control as care. If you're ready to stop having the same fight on different days, this episode is your starting point—because you cannot change what you do not see.
Ryan Dunlap: Conflict/ish
"Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change." — Jim Rohn
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