18: My eldest son was extremely aggressive and intensely angry
Release Date: 12/24/2019
44: “The whole family is walking on eggshells.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“I would like to hear your thoughts on how parents can speak about the elephant in the room.
info_outline
43: “My daughter is overweight.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
My 13 year-old daughter is overweight and I don't know how to handle this.
info_outline
42: “It's the world that's crazy -- not us parents.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“Hi Lisa and Stella. This is not so much of a question, but a warm and heartfelt THANK YOU. I think (hope!) that we're slowly getting to the end of some really tough years.
info_outline
41: “I don’t trust her decision making.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
A year ago when our ADD student daughter then aged 21 revealed to my husband and myself that she was on a waiting list to have cross sex treatment, our 16-year-old son took the role of her trans ally.
info_outline
40: “I know we should love the child we have and not wish them to be different but I can't help having these thoughts.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“I worry that my boy is not very clever and I am secretly embarrassed and ashamed about this. My family is over-invested in achievement and especially educational achievement and the cousins' fabulous exam results are continuously talked about within our family WhatsApp. It is very distressing to feel ashamed of my boy who is both kind and funny. I'm not sure how I should navigate this - should I just declare that he isn't 'academic' and thereby lead the rest of the family to make insinuations that he is a bit stupid? Although I don't equate intelligence with...
info_outline
39: “My work has "juice" for me now while parenting just feels hard and draining.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“I'm feeling incredibly disconnected from my kids right now.
info_outline
38: “My sense of disappointment feels selfish.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“I'm a single mom and I've always worked full time while raising my kids. My youngest is graduating from high school this year and I've been anticipating the empty next stage of life with mixed emotions. I've known it will be tremendously sad, but at the same time, I'm looking forward to having more time to myself for the first time in over two decades. Now with the coronavirus, it looks possible that he won't be leaving for college in the fall and I am feeling very disappointed about this. I know he is disappointed as well. My sense of disappointment feels selfish. It's...
info_outline
37: “Now, with the Coronavirus, she won't have any of the ceremonial endings that seem important to her.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“My 12 year-old is leaving school this year and now, with the Coronavirus, she won't have any of the ceremonial endings that seem to important to her.
info_outline
36: “We never told my parents.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“I come from a close family. My parents have been involved in all aspects of my children’s lives and are extremely special to them. I have one adult sibling who has special needs and is cared for exclusively by my aging parents. At the time of his birth, it was common for children with special needs to be placed in an institution rather than raised at home."
info_outline
35: “Should I ask him if he’s still transgender?”
Secrets of the Motherworld
A year ago, my 16 year old son told us he is transgender. I was completely shocked, as he is not particularly feminine.
info_outline“Simply put; unconditional love, ‘I love you regardless, I love you no matter what, I'll always be here for you’.
My eldest son went to hell and back from his early to late teens, and as a result acted out extraordinarily; he was extremely aggressive, and intensely angry around the clock, disruptive, destructive, and to be honest I was terrified more than once – even to the point of calling the police twice.
They were very dark days, throughout I kept reassuring him how much I loved him and that I would never give up on him. Many many people told me how stupid I was, but I understood his actions came from a place of pain, and I couldn't add to it.
Step forward just a few short years, I have the most incredible, loving, supportive, and upstanding son that any mother could wish for. He is truly wonderful, we laugh until we cry, we share a very close bond.
Never give up on your children.”
Lisa refers to the legend of Tam Lin: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tam_Lin
Lisa also refers to Sue Klebold’s book ‘A Mother’s Reckoning: Living in the aftermath of the Columbine tragedy’: https://books.google.ie/books/about/A_Mother_s_Reckoning.html?id=TEzDCgAAQBAJ&printsec=frontcover&source=kp_read_button&redir_esc=y#v=onepage&q&f=false
Stella tries to, but can quite remember, the names of Nancy Tucker’s books: ‘The Time in Between: A memoir into hunger and hope’ and ‘That Was When People Started to Worry: Windows into Unwell Minds’
https://books.google.ie/books?id=EXa3BgAAQBAJ&source=gbs_similarbooks