44: “The whole family is walking on eggshells.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“I would like to hear your thoughts on how parents can speak about the elephant in the room.
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43: “My daughter is overweight.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
My 13 year-old daughter is overweight and I don't know how to handle this.
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42: “It's the world that's crazy -- not us parents.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“Hi Lisa and Stella. This is not so much of a question, but a warm and heartfelt THANK YOU. I think (hope!) that we're slowly getting to the end of some really tough years.
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41: “I don’t trust her decision making.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
A year ago when our ADD student daughter then aged 21 revealed to my husband and myself that she was on a waiting list to have cross sex treatment, our 16-year-old son took the role of her trans ally.
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40: “I know we should love the child we have and not wish them to be different but I can't help having these thoughts.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“I worry that my boy is not very clever and I am secretly embarrassed and ashamed about this. My family is over-invested in achievement and especially educational achievement and the cousins' fabulous exam results are continuously talked about within our family WhatsApp. It is very distressing to feel ashamed of my boy who is both kind and funny. I'm not sure how I should navigate this - should I just declare that he isn't 'academic' and thereby lead the rest of the family to make insinuations that he is a bit stupid? Although I don't equate intelligence with...
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39: “My work has "juice" for me now while parenting just feels hard and draining.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“I'm feeling incredibly disconnected from my kids right now.
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38: “My sense of disappointment feels selfish.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“I'm a single mom and I've always worked full time while raising my kids. My youngest is graduating from high school this year and I've been anticipating the empty next stage of life with mixed emotions. I've known it will be tremendously sad, but at the same time, I'm looking forward to having more time to myself for the first time in over two decades. Now with the coronavirus, it looks possible that he won't be leaving for college in the fall and I am feeling very disappointed about this. I know he is disappointed as well. My sense of disappointment feels selfish. It's...
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37: “Now, with the Coronavirus, she won't have any of the ceremonial endings that seem important to her.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“My 12 year-old is leaving school this year and now, with the Coronavirus, she won't have any of the ceremonial endings that seem to important to her.
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36: “We never told my parents.”
Secrets of the Motherworld
“I come from a close family. My parents have been involved in all aspects of my children’s lives and are extremely special to them. I have one adult sibling who has special needs and is cared for exclusively by my aging parents. At the time of his birth, it was common for children with special needs to be placed in an institution rather than raised at home."
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35: “Should I ask him if he’s still transgender?”
Secrets of the Motherworld
A year ago, my 16 year old son told us he is transgender. I was completely shocked, as he is not particularly feminine.
info_outline“I‘m scared that I won't heal fast enough I grew up with difficult family circumstances and a complete emotional neglect. In my early twenties I had five years of psychoanalysis and worked through my childhood experiences. For the first time in my life I felt truly accepted and understood; I thought I was healed.
A few years later I got married and we started a family, I was overwhelmed with joy and gratitude after our first child was born. As our family grew the demands became bigger; stress and exhaustion accumulated, and I discovered that the parenting model that I experienced is still inside me and very alive. This came as a huge shock and a surprise and with enormous guilt, shame and negative self-talk around it.
I started doing everything in my power to be kinder, less reactive and triggered, I spend every spare second listening or reading something that might help me on my journey and I started seeing a therapist again (due to the financial and time situation only once per month though). I want nothing more but to be kind and loving mom, support my kids emotional needs and my kids to remember the joy and delight in my eyes when I’m with them, and yet I feel like I’m failing them every day.
I don’t know if I can heal fast enough to be the mom that they need.”
Lisa mentions the book ‘Playful Parenting’ by Laurence Cohen https://g.co/kgs/uEhu2F
while Stella mentions the book ‘All Joy and No Fun’ by Jennifer Senior https://g.co/kgs/D91Lzu