162. Dr. David Lisak, PhD: The Man Who Shaped My Work — Sharing Science, Wisdom, and Hope
Sexual Assault Survivor Stories Podcast - SASS
Release Date: 11/04/2025
188. Martha Gagnon: The Hidden Pattern Behind Coercion
Sexual Assault Survivor Stories Podcast - SASS
Martha Gagnon joins me for a deeply important and, at times, difficult conversation about coercion, control, and what she ultimately came to understand as rape within an intimate relationship. Her story doesn’t follow the narrative many people expect—and that’s exactly why it matters. In this survival story, Martha’s relationship with this particular person began as what appeared to be healthy, emotionally aware, and enlightened. But it slowly shifted into a pattern of pressure, manipulation, and control that escalated over time. Martha walks us through how coercion operated in her...
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187. Sophie: “If I Said No Again…What Would Happen?”
Sexual Assault Survivor Stories Podcast - SASS
Sophie was 14 when she entered a relationship that, at first, felt familiar and exciting. Over time, that relationship shifted into something she couldn’t fully understand in the moment. What began as connection turned into pressure, confusion, and a growing sense that she was responsible for someone else’s emotions, safety, and survival. This episode traces how that shift happened. Not through a single moment, but through a pattern—pushing boundaries in public, introducing sexual expectations early, using guilt and fear, and layering in threats of self-harm. Sophie describes what it...
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186. Joseph Born: The Hidden Reality of Child-on-Child Harm
Sexual Assault Survivor Stories Podcast - SASS
Joseph Born grew up surrounded by the raw, untamed beauty of Alaska—a childhood filled with exploration, curiosity, and the kind of freedom that most people would associate with innocence. But beneath that backdrop was something far different. In this episode, Joseph shares the part of his story that rarely gets talked about with the clarity it deserves: child-on-child sexual abuse, and the lasting imprint it leaves long after childhood ends. What makes this conversation so important is not just what happened, but how it showed up—behavioral shifts, confusion, acting out—things that are...
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185. Sara Perry: This Changes How You Think About Healing
Sexual Assault Survivor Stories Podcast - SASS
This week’s episode takes us into a part of the healing conversation that doesn’t get talked about nearly enough. I sit down with Sara Perry, founder of Haven Space () in Houston, Texas, to explore what it means to approach trauma and intimacy through the body—not just the mind. Sara is a somatic sex educator and sexological bodyworker who works with individuals and couples to reconnect with themselves after experiences of disconnection, shame, or trauma. Her work blends coaching, somatic practices, and body awareness to help people understand how their nervous system responds to...
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184. Emily: I Was Living My Life Like Nothing Happened
Sexual Assault Survivor Stories Podcast - SASS
This week, Emily joins the show to share a story that has lived quietly beneath the surface while life continued to move forward around it. As a young woman navigating the early stages of adulthood, she opens up about what it means to carry the impact of sexual assault while still showing up in the world in ways that appear “normal” to everyone else. This conversation explores the contrast between outward life and internal reality—how someone can be building a future, maintaining relationships, and staying socially connected, all while holding onto something deeply unresolved. Emily...
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183. Darlene Lekowski: She Buried the Truth as a Child…What Happened When It Resurfaced?
Sexual Assault Survivor Stories Podcast - SASS
Before I get into these notes, I want to pass along this from this week’s guest, Darlene Lekowski. She mentioned during our conversation that her audiobook, Shattering Silence, is dropping to just ninety-nine cents this coming Thursday, April 2nd, as her release-day promo. Go to amazon.com and look-up her book title, again—shattering silence, and you’ll find the promotional deal. This is a limited-time opportunity, so if you’re hearing this on or before april 2nd, 2026, go take a look—you won’t want to miss this audiobook in Darlene’s own voice! ...
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182. Cassie Nicholas: When Help Was a Setup
Sexual Assault Survivor Stories Podcast - SASS
Cassie Nicholas returns to the podcast with a story that is as urgent as it is revealing. After everything she has already survived, Cassie found herself in a situation that looked—on the surface—like support and stability. People she trusted offered help, a way to get back on her feet, a path forward. But what she began to recognize, piece by piece, was something far more dangerous: those same individuals were attempting to traffic her. In this episode, I sit down with Cassie as she walks through that realization—how subtle the warning signs can be, how manipulation can be disguised...
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181. MJ: A Few Minutes That Changed Everything
Sexual Assault Survivor Stories Podcast - SASS
In this powerful interview, MJ shares her journey through sexual assault, dissociation, and healing. We explore trauma's impact on the body and mind, the importance of support systems, and pathways to recovery. Discover the profound insights from MJ, a university student and trauma advocate, as she shares her story of resilience and healing after sexual assault. Trauma can alter the course of our lives in unimaginable ways; her journey through trauma began during her sophomore year. In this post, we’ll explore the insights she shared during our conversation about how trauma impacts the...
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180. Norma Peterson-Part 2: Furthering the Discussion of the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit
Sexual Assault Survivor Stories Podcast - SASS
This week, I am again featuring as my guest, Norma Peterson, Executive Director of Document the Abuse, to talk about the lasting impact of the Stacy Peterson case and the broader importance of documenting abuse when systems fail survivors. Our conversation explores how power, media narratives, and institutional silence can obscure truth—and why preserving survivor stories is not only important, but necessary. As Executive Director, Norma oversees the organization’s survivor-centered advocacy, education, and documentation initiatives. A central focus of her work is the Evidentiary Abuse...
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179. Dr. Asher: Survivor-Led, System-Changing
Sexual Assault Survivor Stories Podcast - SASS
Let me introduce you to this week’s guest, Dr. Asher. I wanted her here on the show because she is someone whose work sits at the intersection of lived experience, rigorous research, and embodied understanding of trauma. Dr. Asher is a survivor, a scholar, and a systems-level educator who has spent more than two decades studying what sexual trauma actually does to the brain and nervous system—and what institutions consistently get wrong in their response to it. Her work is not abstract. It is not performative. And it is not built on buzzwords. Dr. Asher speaks from lived survivor...
info_outlineI’m so honored to share this week’s episode of The SASS Podcast with someone who is far more than a guest—he’s a mentor, a guiding light, and a dear friend: Dr. David Lisak, PhD.
I’ve personally known David since 1992, when I met him at a training conference where we were both teaching on rape and sexual assault investigations. From those early days of my journey into trauma-informed investigations, inspired by David, he set the bar for what rigorous, compassionate, science-based work looks like. I’m grateful every day that our paths crossed.
Who is David Lisak?
- David is a clinical and forensic psychologist whose career has been defined by an extraordinary depth of research into interpersonal violence, sexual assault, and the long-term impact of childhood abuse—especially in men. (House Docs)
- He earned his PhD from Duke University and later served as Associate Professor of Psychology at University of Massachusetts Boston. (Wikipedia)
- His research includes seminal work on so-called “undetected rapists” — men who committed sexual assault but were never prosecuted — helping shift how the criminal justice system and institutions think about serial offending and victim vulnerability. (TIME)
- He is a founding board member of 1in6 — a nonprofit dedicated to supporting male survivors of childhood sexual abuse and trauma. (House Docs)
- David’s work has had real-world reach: trainings across every U.S. state, consultation with the military, and involvement in major judicial and prosecutorial education efforts on sexual assault. (kirtland.af.mil)
- On a personal level, David is himself a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. He turned that lived wound into a mission: to break silence, deepen understanding, and empower both survivors and the professionals who serve them. (1in6.org)
Why I Asked David to Be on the Show
- Because when I think about trauma-informed interviewing, especially in the sexual assault realm, nobody blends the neuroscience, the forensic rigor, the interviewing technique, and the survivor-centered ethos quite like David.
- Because I’ve seen firsthand how he mentors (me and others) with humility, curiosity, and a deep commitment to doing no additional harm.
- Because our book and masterclass work (on trauma-informed investigations) simply wouldn’t be as strong without grounding from his research and example.
- Because the connection is personal. As someone in this field, you hope for a few mentors who walk the talk. David is one of those. I’m deeply honoured to have him here, and I want our audience to know just how lucky we are to learn alongside him.
What We’ll Explore in This Episode
- The neuroscience of trauma in sexual assault: what happens in the brain and how knowing that changes how we interview survivors.
- The dynamics of perpetration: David’s research on serial offenders, undetected rapists, and how institutions often miss the patterns.
- Interviewing victims without retraumatizing: practical tactics, grounded in empathy, science, and the deep lessons David has gleaned over decades.
- What it means to bring a trauma-informed lens into the criminal justice system: both the opportunities and the hard realities.
- David’s personal journey: how his own survival informed his work, and how hope and resilience can coexist with the gravity of this subject.
Some Notable Highlights & Quotes
- In one of his foundational works, David describes the paradox-that despite sexual assault being treated as one of the most serious crimes, the vast majority of rapes are never prosecuted—and the myths around victim behavior and perpetrator profile still linger. (static.csbsju.edu)
- His 2002 study, “Repeat Rape and Multiple Offending Among Undetected Rapists”, revealed very sobering statistics: among a sample of men who had self-reported acts meeting the legal definition of rape, the average number of rapes per offender was roughly six. (TIME)
- David is quoted in a military base article saying: “Sexual violence is a global problem. It affects every institution and community. The only question: Is it confronted with honesty and commitment?” (kirtland.af.mil)
- From his story on 1in6: “He turned from farming to psychology… He transformed his early traumatic experiences into a career of research and clinical work, focused on trauma.” (1in6.org)
My Personal Reflection
David, I want to say directly: your friendship, your mentorship, your unwavering standard have meant more to me than I can adequately express in these notes. You have modeled for me what it means to combine rigorous science with deep compassion; to enter the “hard space” of sexual assault investigation without turning away; to always center the survivor’s lived experience while equipping professionals with clear, actionable insight. Having you on the SASS Podcast feels like coming full circle. I’m proud, humbled, and ready to dive deep with you.
Audience Takeaway (for them to remember)
- Think of this not just as a “talk episode” but as an opportunity: with David here, you’ll be challenged to think differently about trauma, interviewing, and systems of response.
- If you work in criminal justice, victim advocacy, forensic interviewing—or even just care deeply about supporting survivors—tune in with a notebook handy. David brings insights you’ll want to capture.
- And if you’re a survivor or know one: you’ll hear someone who both understands the science and honors the person behind the trauma. That combination is rare—and precious.
Thank you, David, for accepting my invitation, for journeying with me into this space, and for being the kind of mentor I’ve aspired to be like. And to our listeners: brace yourselves for one of the richest conversations we’ve had on The SASS Podcast.
An important side note: if you’re finding value in this show and these amazing episodes, please take a moment to leave a 5-star rating on your podcast platform. AND, follow SexualAssaultSurvivorStories on Instagram, then, please send me a note of support. I can’t tell you how much your emails mean to me—they fuel my passion to keep this podcast going. And if you’re a victim or survivor and are ready to tell your story in order to help yourself or someone else heal, let me know, and we can start a conversation about the possibility of you being on the show. Here’s my email address: dave@sasstories.com Thank you to all of you who have reached out to me already. Just provide me with a phone number where I can reach back out to you…because I like to talk to people who are interested in guesting. And please keep those emails and texts coming…I truly look forward to hearing from you!
Here are some critically important links that I hope you’ll take the time to explore, and where a contribution is requested, please consider doing so!—Thank you!!
https://time.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/repeat_rape.pdf?utm_source=chatgpt.com
https://www.whattheydontsay.com
https://www.survivor-school.com/?ref=DAVEMARKEL
As mentioned, and emphasized, it’s time to Normalize the Conversation.™ And please remember to Start by Believing…because we all know someone whose life has been impacted by rape or sexual assault.
Thank you for tuning in.