DATING WHILE DISABLED
Sex Ed The Musical
You’re about to meet my friend , who is single, smart, adventurous, athletic, hilarious, a cat lover, defiantly carnivorous, a beer enthusiast, and a million more things. Oh yeah, she’s also disabled. In this episode, we talk about what it’s like to date when you’re disabled. How she meets people. What it’s like to have sex when you have disabilities. How she navigates the always complex dating world, and the hilarious way she’s rebelling against her parents. You’ll never guess in a million years. Nearly 1 in 4 adults in the United States has some type of...
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PARTY ON THE PELVIC FLOOR
Sex Ed The Musical
May was National Masturbation Month! Did you spend all 31 days dialing your rotary phone? I certainly hope so. You may not realize this, but one of the keys to stronger, longer lasting orgasms is a healthy pelvic floor. But what is a pelvic floor, and does it require a cork underlayment? Sorry…I watch a lot of home improvement shows. On this episode, I talk to . With over 15,000 hours of clinical practice under her belt (pun intended) Rachel is a leading expert on pelvic health. For the next half hour, she’s your guide to, as she calls it, the “cave of...
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IN BED WITH A SEX COACH
Sex Ed The Musical
Having sex with someone new can be a potentially stressful situation. “How do I measure up with their other partners?” “What do they think of my body?” “Am I pleasing them?” Now, imagine you’re in bed with a professional SEX COACH whose job is to teach people how to enjoy the most fulfilling sex and pleasure possible. That is A LOT of pressure. For you…and them. On this episode I speak with Wendy Perkins, a trauma-informed orgasm, and neuro-pleasure coach. An author and sought-after expert who’s been featured in , Wendy hacked her own ADHD, and now helps people discover...
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GETTING NAKED FOR "WEIRD AL" YANKOVIC
Sex Ed The Musical
Amish Paradise. Eat It. Like A Surgeon. I Love Rocky Road. Smells Like Nirvana. I Lost On Jeopardy. White & Nerdy… Since the early 80s, has been churning out hit song parodies, some more enduring than the original songs that inspired them. An unapologetic nerd and proud outsider, his songs are not just commentaries on pop culture, they’re also full of references to Star Wars, comic books and lunch meats. But there’s something about the “King Of The Nerds” that speaks directly to his army of die-hard fans: It’s 100% cool to be yourself, especially if you’re weird. One of...
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RE/INVENTED EMILY SINCLAIR
Sex Ed The Musical
“Follow your bliss and don't be afraid. Doors will open where you didn't know they were going to be.” — Imagine you’ve produced some of the biggest hit shows in television. You’ve won accolades and prestigious, pointy awards for your work. You’re at the top of your game and everyone wants to hire you. Yet, you’re totally miserable. Not so hard to believe, really. In this Re/Invented interview I speak with Emily Sinclair. An executive producer at the top of the TV game, Emily had it all. Executive Producing fancy shows…constant work…big money…someone always handing you...
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WHEN YOUR SEXUAL FANTASY COMES TRUE
Sex Ed The Musical
fan·ta·sy /ˈfan(t)əsē/ noun Imagination, especially when extravagant and unrestrained. Often impossible or improbable. It's a fact. We all have fantasies. From scoring the game-winning touchdown, to winning an Academy Award, to destroying the drum kit in your next door neighbor’s garage with a sledge hammer. I’m speaking hypothetically, of course. Fantasies are a healthy and normal part of the human experience. Within the vast array of fantasies, you’ll also find Sexual Fantasies. Their main purpose is to turn us on. But what happens if one of them actually comes true? They say...
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UNDER COVERS "THE SEX COACH"
Sex Ed The Musical
Welcome back you sickening bitches! (sorry…I’ve been watching a lot of ) Sooooo, after going Under Covers with a few fellas, I figured I’d flip the script and in this episode speak to a professional in the world of sex. A Sex Coach, to be exact. Okay, what’s a Sex Coach? Great question, thank you for asking. According to the folks at , Sex Coaching is not is not sex therapy. (Sex Coaches) focus on the present and the future, helping clients move towards what they want to achieve. Sex coaching typically takes place over a shorter time frame than sex therapy. Sex coaches are not sex...
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UNDER COVERS -- FOREST
Sex Ed The Musical
This week’s conversation is with a male, who spent his first 24 years as a female. Not exactly by choice. As Forest says on his website, “Growing up as a doubly closeted gay boy in the Midwest, I cultivated a vivid world inside my head where I felt safe and free. Eventually, I would have to come out of hiding no matter how scary it felt. I realized the fear was never going to disappear, but I felt like I was starting to disappear after so many years of keeping parts of myself boxed in.” For the first 24 years of his life, Forest didn’t have the language to articulate his experience...
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UNDER COVERS -- MY 7th GRADE BOYFRIEND
Sex Ed The Musical
7th grade. It’s a boy/girl party in my best friend’s basement. There are about 10 of us there. Rumors by Fleetwood Mac, is playing non-stop on the record player. The lights are low. The air is filled with equal parts anticipation and terror. Someone suggests we play a game called 7 Minutes in Heaven. The voice you’re about to hear belongs to someone who was also at that party. We eventually lost touch with each other when I moved to the big city in 8th grade, but we recently reconnected. When I asked him if he’d be interested in being interviewed as part of the Under Covers series he...
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UNDER COVERS -- "DAVID"
Sex Ed The Musical
Three years ago on this podcast, I began asking women of different ages, sexual identities and socioeconomic backgrounds a series of questions about the most intimate details of their lives. I called the interviews Under Covers. All of the women were asked the same questions about their sexual awakenings, different partners, early experiences and relationships, with the hope that we could find healing in discovering how much we all share. Well this season, I’ve decided to flip the script. I’m taking the exact questions I asked women, and I’m asking them to men. In this first Under Covers...
info_outlineEarlier this week, an active player in the NFL made huge news. Carl Nassib, a defensive end for the Las Vegas Raiders came out as gay. As of this writing, he is the only openly gay active NFL player.
Hopefully, he won’t be alone for long.
“Carl Nassib’s powerful coming out is a historic reflection of the growing state of LGBTQ visibility and inclusion in the world of professional sports, which has been driven by a long list of brave LGBTQ athletes who came before him,” said GLAAD President & CEO Sarah Kate Ellis. “As an accomplished athlete who is now the first out gay active player in the NFL, Carl Nassib’s story will not only have a profound impact on the future of LGBTQ visibility and acceptance in sports, but sends a strong message to so many LGBTQ people, especially youth, that they too can one day grow up to be and succeed as a professional athlete like him.”
Representation matters. But for every massive step forward, there remain hundreds of steps backwards.
According the Human Rights Campaign, “2021 has officially surpassed 2015 as the worst year for anti-LGBTQ legislation in recent history.” The HRC reports that more than 250 anti-LGBTQ bills have been introduced in state legislatures in 2021, including at least 35 bills that would prohibit transgender youth from being able to access age-appropriate, gender-affirming medical care.
So when a badass defensive end for the Raiders, of all teams, comes out as gay and then makes a $100,000 donation to The Trevor Project, make no mistake, it’s a big fucking deal.
Okay, but what does this have to do with my life?
Well…
Let’s imagine you’re sitting down with your 10 year-old for a dinner of mac and cheese, chicken nuggets and grapes. All on separate plates, of course. On the table there’s a box of spilled apple juice, a few Snoopy stickers and several dried out markers. Soccer gear is strewn on the floor alongside a few of this morning’s Cheerios and a naked Barbie missing half of her hair. It’s just another day.
Until your kid turns to you and says, “Mom, I think I’m a lesbian.”
How would you react in that moment?
For many parents this is a moment they never saw coming, but it got there. Fast. What should you say? What shouldn’t you say? Were you completely surprised? Have you always known but never really accepted it? How do you hear this and let your child know that they’re safe and loved and what they’re feeling is perfectly okay?
It’s a situation that millions of parents have faced. And thanks to increasing positive role models and representation, the average age of children coming out has dropped from their early 20s to anywhere between 14 and 16. Parents shouldn’t just assume their children are straight until proven otherwise. Even if your kid has a different identity in two years or two months, it’s important to support how they feel today.
But where do you start?
On this episode, a repeat of one of my most downloaded episodes, I speak with Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Childhood Mental Health Specialist, Melody Murray https://www.parkstherapy.com/. She reveals the struggles that children of all backgrounds must navigate and gives parents tools to help their children know that they’re loved, supported and safe regardless of sexual orientation. I also speak with a friend whose 13 year-old daughter decided to come out during a family vacation. Blindsided, the mother responded in the best way she could.
How you respond to your child’s coming out can be what keeps your kid alive.
I’ve also found several very helpful resources for parents of LGBT kids:
https://www.stonewall.org.uk/help-advice/coming-out/coming-out-advice-and-guidance-parents
https://pflag.org/sites/default/files/OUR%20CHILDREN_PFLAGNational_FINAL.pdf
https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/tips-for-parents-of-lgbtq-youth
https://nccc.georgetown.edu/documents/LGBT_Brief.pdf
https://www.insider.com/what-to-do-when-someone-comes-out-2017-12
I also recommend the book: This is a Book for Parents of Gay Kids: A Question & Answer Guide to Everyday Life
Being gay is not a crime and it’s not a sin. Some people believe that having an LGBTQ child means they somehow failed as a parent.
Disowning your child means you failed as a parent.
I think most experts will agree that the best thing you can say to your child when they come out is: I Love You.
That is the perfect place to start.