DATING WHILE DISABLED
Sex Ed The Musical
You’re about to meet my friend , who is single, smart, adventurous, athletic, hilarious, a cat lover, defiantly carnivorous, a beer enthusiast, and a million more things. Oh yeah, she’s also disabled. In this episode, we talk about what it’s like to date when you’re disabled. How she meets people. What it’s like to have sex when you have disabilities. How she navigates the always complex dating world, and the hilarious way she’s rebelling against her parents. You’ll never guess in a million years. Nearly 1 in 4 adults in the United States has some type of...
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PARTY ON THE PELVIC FLOOR
Sex Ed The Musical
May was National Masturbation Month! Did you spend all 31 days dialing your rotary phone? I certainly hope so. You may not realize this, but one of the keys to stronger, longer lasting orgasms is a healthy pelvic floor. But what is a pelvic floor, and does it require a cork underlayment? Sorry…I watch a lot of home improvement shows. On this episode, I talk to . With over 15,000 hours of clinical practice under her belt (pun intended) Rachel is a leading expert on pelvic health. For the next half hour, she’s your guide to, as she calls it, the “cave of...
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IN BED WITH A SEX COACH
Sex Ed The Musical
Having sex with someone new can be a potentially stressful situation. “How do I measure up with their other partners?” “What do they think of my body?” “Am I pleasing them?” Now, imagine you’re in bed with a professional SEX COACH whose job is to teach people how to enjoy the most fulfilling sex and pleasure possible. That is A LOT of pressure. For you…and them. On this episode I speak with Wendy Perkins, a trauma-informed orgasm, and neuro-pleasure coach. An author and sought-after expert who’s been featured in , Wendy hacked her own ADHD, and now helps people discover...
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GETTING NAKED FOR "WEIRD AL" YANKOVIC
Sex Ed The Musical
Amish Paradise. Eat It. Like A Surgeon. I Love Rocky Road. Smells Like Nirvana. I Lost On Jeopardy. White & Nerdy… Since the early 80s, has been churning out hit song parodies, some more enduring than the original songs that inspired them. An unapologetic nerd and proud outsider, his songs are not just commentaries on pop culture, they’re also full of references to Star Wars, comic books and lunch meats. But there’s something about the “King Of The Nerds” that speaks directly to his army of die-hard fans: It’s 100% cool to be yourself, especially if you’re weird. One of...
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RE/INVENTED EMILY SINCLAIR
Sex Ed The Musical
“Follow your bliss and don't be afraid. Doors will open where you didn't know they were going to be.” — Imagine you’ve produced some of the biggest hit shows in television. You’ve won accolades and prestigious, pointy awards for your work. You’re at the top of your game and everyone wants to hire you. Yet, you’re totally miserable. Not so hard to believe, really. In this Re/Invented interview I speak with Emily Sinclair. An executive producer at the top of the TV game, Emily had it all. Executive Producing fancy shows…constant work…big money…someone always handing you...
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WHEN YOUR SEXUAL FANTASY COMES TRUE
Sex Ed The Musical
fan·ta·sy /ˈfan(t)əsē/ noun Imagination, especially when extravagant and unrestrained. Often impossible or improbable. It's a fact. We all have fantasies. From scoring the game-winning touchdown, to winning an Academy Award, to destroying the drum kit in your next door neighbor’s garage with a sledge hammer. I’m speaking hypothetically, of course. Fantasies are a healthy and normal part of the human experience. Within the vast array of fantasies, you’ll also find Sexual Fantasies. Their main purpose is to turn us on. But what happens if one of them actually comes true? They say...
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UNDER COVERS "THE SEX COACH"
Sex Ed The Musical
Welcome back you sickening bitches! (sorry…I’ve been watching a lot of ) Sooooo, after going Under Covers with a few fellas, I figured I’d flip the script and in this episode speak to a professional in the world of sex. A Sex Coach, to be exact. Okay, what’s a Sex Coach? Great question, thank you for asking. According to the folks at , Sex Coaching is not is not sex therapy. (Sex Coaches) focus on the present and the future, helping clients move towards what they want to achieve. Sex coaching typically takes place over a shorter time frame than sex therapy. Sex coaches are not sex...
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UNDER COVERS -- FOREST
Sex Ed The Musical
This week’s conversation is with a male, who spent his first 24 years as a female. Not exactly by choice. As Forest says on his website, “Growing up as a doubly closeted gay boy in the Midwest, I cultivated a vivid world inside my head where I felt safe and free. Eventually, I would have to come out of hiding no matter how scary it felt. I realized the fear was never going to disappear, but I felt like I was starting to disappear after so many years of keeping parts of myself boxed in.” For the first 24 years of his life, Forest didn’t have the language to articulate his experience...
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UNDER COVERS -- MY 7th GRADE BOYFRIEND
Sex Ed The Musical
7th grade. It’s a boy/girl party in my best friend’s basement. There are about 10 of us there. Rumors by Fleetwood Mac, is playing non-stop on the record player. The lights are low. The air is filled with equal parts anticipation and terror. Someone suggests we play a game called 7 Minutes in Heaven. The voice you’re about to hear belongs to someone who was also at that party. We eventually lost touch with each other when I moved to the big city in 8th grade, but we recently reconnected. When I asked him if he’d be interested in being interviewed as part of the Under Covers series he...
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UNDER COVERS -- "DAVID"
Sex Ed The Musical
Three years ago on this podcast, I began asking women of different ages, sexual identities and socioeconomic backgrounds a series of questions about the most intimate details of their lives. I called the interviews Under Covers. All of the women were asked the same questions about their sexual awakenings, different partners, early experiences and relationships, with the hope that we could find healing in discovering how much we all share. Well this season, I’ve decided to flip the script. I’m taking the exact questions I asked women, and I’m asking them to men. In this first Under Covers...
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Cynthia Nixon. Meredith Baxter. Niecy Nash. Cassandra Peterson/Elvira. Elizabeth Gilbert. Glennon Doyle. Carol Liefer. Wanda Sykes.
What do the incredibly accomplished and talented women on this list all have in common?
They all dated and/or married men…until later in life when they all fell in love with other woman.
Often to their own surprise.
Known as Later in Life Lesbians, these women discovered an entirely new level of intimacy, happiness and sexual satisfaction, with members of the same sex.
It should be no surprise. In a recent study, 95% of heterosexual men said they reached orgasm when being sexually intimate. How many hetero women had orgasms with their male partners? 65%.
Read that again. 95% of straight men had orgasms. 65% of straight women. In comparison, the orgasm rate for lesbians was 86%. Not that I even need to explain this, but the women who reported more orgasms were recipients of more oral sex.
Because, of course.
Men, I’ve been saying this for years. You are the next Fotomat.
What is driving so many women to switch teams later in life? Is this part of a much bigger trend? Is this all a backlash because so many straight women are sexually dissatisfied due to their male partners? Is this all about the dishwasher?
Whatever the case may be, sexuality is lot more fluid than many realize.
To get some answers, I speak with Coming Out Coach, Anne-Marie Zanzal. An author, and herself, a later in life lesbian, she provides one-on-one and group coaching to women coming out later in life. Her memoir Authentic Peace tells the story of her chaotic childhood, challenging marriage, sexual awakening, and recreating her life after 50.
We talk about the growing phenomenon of women becoming lesbians later in life. The not-so surprising reasons behind their decisions. And then she gives me her Are You Secretly a Lesbian test.
It was an oral exam, natch.
No matter where you are on your journey, there’s a good chance you’ve made many life choices for reasons you don’t even realize. A lot of people stay in unsuccessful relationships for all sorts of reasons. It can be challenging to understand a brand new attraction or perhaps feelings you’ve kept suppressed for years.
But, remember, life is short. You deserve all of the happiness and consensual pleasure you desire.
Anne-Marie’s Social Media Links
Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/revzanzal
Website — https://annemariezanzal.com/
Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/annemariezanzalcoaching/
O Quarterly — https://www.oprahdaily.com/life/a37762569/late-in-life-lesbian-story/
Blog — https://annemariezanzal.com/tips-on-queer-dating-when-coming-out-later-in-life-by-reina-gattuso/
Additional Information Resources
https://www.wellandgood.com/coming-out-later-in-life/
https://www.chatelaine.com/living/coming-out-later-in-life/
https://www.wbur.org/npr/129050832/story.php
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/things-lesbians-want-you-to-know_b_8577926
Hey, if your book club reads my book, 3 Secrets to the Happy and Healthy Relationship You’ve Always F*cking Wanted, I’ll Zoom in, say hello and we can have a quick Q&A. We’ll keep it fun and light. It’s a great way for me to get to know to the folks who are enjoying my book. Is that you? Yes!?!
Well then let’s talk, sister!
Email me and I’ll Zoom into your book club for some fun.
Some restrictions apply…I just haven’t figured them out yet.
For all sorts of fun stories from my days running programming at Playboy TV, sure to check out my writing on Medium.com.
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Thanks, as always, for listening.
See you next time!
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Niecy Nash image by John Mueller, CC BY 2.5
Cynthia Nixon image by Yahoo from Sunnyvale, California, USA, CC BY 2.0
Elvira Image by Orange County Archives from Orange County, California, United States of America, CC BY 2.0