You're Doing It Wrong: Why Your Anxiety Tools Aren't Making You Calm (And What Actually Does)
Calm AF
You know what to do. You've read the books, listened to the podcasts, practiced the breathwork. You know your attachment style, you've done the inner child work, you can meditate when you remember to. So why aren't you calm yet? In this episode, I'm telling you the hard truth about why all those tools you've collected aren't working—and it's not because you haven't found the right one yet. This episode will sting a little. But if you're exhausted from working so hard to feel inner peace and it never seems to stick, this is the wake-up call you need. What You'll Learn: Why...
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Conflict Avoidant? Walking on Eggshells? You Might Be an Energy Manager.
Calm AF
Change takes consistency. If you’d love a gentle nudge each day to stay on track while you're creating new patterns, grab my In this episode, we're revisiting one of the most resonant topics here at Calm AF: The Energy Manager. If you're the calm, capable one everyone relies on...you can read a room, smooth over tension, and keep everyone's emotions balanced with one hand behind your back, but YOU are slowly losing your light..this is for you. We're gonna break down how being "fine" on the outside while managing everyone else's emotional temperature isn't emotional...
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You Aren't Behind, You're Doing It Right
Calm AF
I am nipping some unhelpful thinking in the bud in this episode. YOU ARE NOT BEHIND. Just because you haven't solidified a plan or taken major action the first two weeks of January doesn't mean you're doing it wrong. January comes with these absurd and unrealistic expectations that we should already have our goals mapped out, habits in place, and our “new self” fully activated. But that's not how it works. In episode 343, I'm sharing why this season is better suited for reflection and getting oriented than performance and how identity creates habits (not the other way around) If...
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Why You’re Overthinking Everything (And Why It Gets Worse the More Successful You Are)
Calm AF
From the outside, you look steady. People trust you. You handle shit. You neverrrrr let them see you sweat. Inside, though, your mind doesn’t stop. Your constantly replaying conversations and second guessing decisions that you've already spent forever trying to make. And you think that, surely by now, you'd be past this level of doubt. This episode is for high-functioning, high-achieving people who aren’t lacking confidence or skill but are exhausted from the constant mental vigilance. We’re talking about: Why overthinking increases after success, not before How managing...
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Identity Shifting: The Most Important Step (That You Probably Skip)
Calm AF
As we close out 2025, this episode is an invitation to pause before you plan. If the year felt beautiful—amazing. And if it felt heavy, disorienting, or unfinished—you’re not alone. Instead of starting the new year with goals, strategies, or fixing yourself, this episode begins where real change actually starts: identity. In this episode, I’m sharing Step One from my Future Self Course: Dream Big. Not as a vision board exercise. Not as wishful thinking. And not as a plan. But as a necessary first step in identity creation. Inside this lesson, we explore: Why starting with how keeps...
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REPLAY: Navigating the Holiday Vortex
Calm AF
The week between Christmas and New Year’s—what I call the holiday vortex—is your secret weapon for creating a calm, focused, and successful start to 2025. In this episode, I’ll show you why rest is the most productive thing you can do and how using this unique time strategically can help you achieve more without burnout. You’ll learn how to break free from the productivity treadmill, rewire your nervous system, and step into the new year with clarity, confidence, and joy. If you’re an ambitious high achiever ready to thrive without exhaustion, this episode is for you. ...
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You Are the Main Character: How to Rewrite Your Identity and Change Your Life
Calm AF
What if you approached your own life with the same intentionality a screenwriter brings to their main character? In this episode, we're talking about why so many high-achievers are living like background characters in their own story AND how to step into the lead role. You'll learn: Why identity always precedes behavior (and why most people get this backwards) The difference between writing yourself from the inside out vs. the outside in How one client became "a person who exercises every day" without willpower or discipline Why change feels so hard when you're operating from the...
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The Truth About Priorities
Calm AF
If I could go back and tell my younger self something, it would be this: Figure out what really matters in life. Figure out what, at the end of your life, made it a life well lived. And then figure out HOW to not forget it. (This episode is a replay from 2023) Here’s the EASIEST way: Change takes consistency. If you’d love a gentle nudge each day to stay on track while you’re creating new patterns, grab my Every morning, get a love letter in your inbox – a daily reminder that you aren’t here to be a perfect human before you can enjoy this amazing, precious life you’ve been...
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Stop Fixing Yourself: You're Not a Project.
Calm AF
In today’s episode of Calm AF, we’re diving deep into one of the most harmful modern mindsets: the belief that you have to fix yourself before you can enjoy your life. If you’ve ever felt like you need to check off a to-do list before you’re allowed to relax or be happy — this episode is your reminder to stop fixing yourself to be happy. Inspired by a love letter from my private podcast, this “spiel” explores why you don’t need to earn joy, peace, or worthiness. You’re not a project — you’re a human being living a once-in-a-lifetime experience. And that means you...
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Why You're Stuck and How to Change — And Find Peace of Mind
Calm AF
Get to rewire your nervous system and mindset patterns. You say you want peace. You say you're ready to stop overthinking, people-pleasing, and spinning out. So why does your brain keep dragging you back into suffering — even when life gives you a moment to breathe? In this episode, we're talking about the ways we argue against our own peace — and how we fight harder to stay stuck than to change. You'll learn why familiar thoughts like: “I’m not good enough.” “Life’s harder for me.” “People always let me down.” …feel so true — and how to stop identifying with...
info_outlineToday's episode is a little different than what you're used to hearing. Today I wrote US a commencment speech.
Inspired by my son’s high school graduation, I started thinking about all the ways adults are graduating: out of relationships, into relationships, out of old roles, into new chapters, out of versions of ourselves that no longer fit.
But we rarely pause to celebrate those transitions. In fact, we usually shame ourselves for them.
Not today.
This speech is for the 38-, 48-, 58-year-old who’s starting over. Starting again. Moving into a new chapter. It’s a love letter to your resilience, your wisdom, and your still-unfolding story.
In this episode, you’ll hear:
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Why every ending is actually a graduation
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What midlife commencement really looks like (hint: pet hair + coffee stains included)
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The truth about possibility, purpose, and starting over
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A powerful reminder that you’re right on time, exactly as you are
Whether you’re navigating a breakup, a career pivot, an empty nest, or just a quiet inner shift—you’re not behind. You’re on the brink. The world is still yours.
Links & Resources:
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The Upgrade
90 days of guided transformation—from hyper achiever to Calm AF high performer.
Every week, you’ll get a focused lesson to keep you on track as you master nervous system regulation and emotional resilience. You also get direct access to me via Voxer—for quick, personalized coaching as life happens. - Secret Podcast: HyperAchiever to High Performer
A free audio series to help you make the transition from an overwhelmed overachiever to a regulated, calm AF high performer. -
Come say hi on Instagram: @kristenfinch10
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