Trauma, Grief, and Disrupting Death-Dealing Systems with Dr. Jamie Eaddy
Release Date: 08/01/2025
The Allender Center Podcast
As the year comes to a close, Dan and Becky Allender continue their annual podcast tradition: pausing to reflect on the year that has passed. They share a bit about their own experiences—what they’ve learned, what they’re grieving, and what they’re celebrating—as they prepare to enter a new season. Together, they invite you to also pause and reflect: What moments from your year need remembering? What relationships could use repair or deeper care? What desires and hopes might God be stirring in your heart for the year ahead? We are deeply grateful for your presence and support of the...
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This Advent season, Dan Allender and Rachael Clinton Chen are joined by Rev. Dr. Michael Chen for a rich and deeply human conversation about the Trinity and what it reveals to us about God, ourselves, and our relationships with others. Together, they explore how the mystery of one God in three persons shapes our understanding of love, relationality, and beauty—particularly in the context of Advent, when we reflect on God’s incarnation and presence in the world. This episode is an invitation to pause, wonder, and engage your heart with the presence of God in this season of...
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As we begin the Advent season, Dan and Rachael welcome writer and theologian Blaine Eldredge back to the podcast for a sweeping, story-rich journey into history, theology, and the fierce hope of the incarnation. If you love church history or the nuance of theological debate, this episode is a feast. And if you don’t consider yourself a scholar, you’re still fully invited in, because the questions raised here reach all of us who long for God-with-us in turbulent times. They approach Advent by way of one of the most compelling figures of the early church: Athanasius, the fourth-century...
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Loneliness is a human experience, but it’s one we don’t always acknowledge honestly. In this deeply personal conversation, Dan and Rachael open up about the moments when loneliness and suffering make us unsure of what we need, what we want, or how to ask for help. They also zoom out: why loneliness is rising, how our culture quietly reinforces isolation, and why recognizing our ache for connection is a sign of our humanity, not our failure. You probably won’t find quick fixes or step-by-step solutions in this conversation. Rather, consider this episode an invitation to reflect on your...
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Thanksgiving is right around the corner. It can be a day of tradition, family, and connection. It can also bring tension, exhaustion, grief, or even trigger old wounds. Today, Dan and Rachael reflect on the complex reality of the holiday: the joy, the nostalgia, the chaos, and the moments that can leave us feeling overwhelmed or even “devoured” by family dynamics. Drawing on their own stories and looking ahead to this year’s holiday, they explore how to hold gratitude alongside grief, and how to create meaningful connection without losing yourself. Whether you’re hosting,...
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Marriage always carries both joy and challenge… but what happens when life pushes you to the edge? When trauma, illness, loss, stress, or sheer exhaustion stretch your relationship beyond its limits? In this tender and often humorous conversation, Rachael Clinton Chen interviews Dan and Becky Allender to explore what it means to love and be loved through seasons of extremity—those times when the demands of life exceed our capacity to meet them. From everyday frustrations to the deep pain of seasons of loss, physical suffering, and ministry fatigue, Dan and Becky reflect honestly on how...
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Ever have a day where everything goes sideways and your body just won’t calm down? In this episode, Dan Allender and Rachael Clinton Chen explore emotional dysregulation: why our nervous systems spiral under stress, especially with a history of trauma, and how we can respond with mercy rather than shame. Through humor, real-life stories, and insights from both neuroscience and Scripture, they show that dysregulation isn’t weakness; it’s a signal from your body asking for care and compassion. Their conversation also offers practical ways to tend to your body, mind, and soul. Listener...
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If you’ve ever wrestled with the long, uneven work of healing, we hope today’s conversation offers courage for the journey. Dan shares his recent reflections on the lament of waiting found in Psalm 13 and the persistent pursuit of justice embodied by Erin Brockovich as he rewatched the 2000 film. He and Rachael explore the tension between justice today and the full restoration that is “not yet,” bringing these insights into the lingering impact of past sexual abuse. Healing after sexual abuse shapes not just your body but your whole affective and relational world. When harm...
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Healing from spiritual abuse and religious trauma is not a simple, linear journey. In this week’s episode of the Allender Center Podcast, Rachael Clinton Chen sits down with Dr. Hillary McBride—psychologist, researcher, and author of “Holy Hurt: Understanding Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing”—to explore the invisible wounds that trauma leaves on our minds, bodies, and spirits. They talk about: How trauma can be reinforced by the very systems meant to guide and protect us. The profound importance of witnessing, connection, and radical welcoming in your recovery...
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In this week’s wise and profoundly human conversation, Dr. Dan Allender sits down with longtime friend and former student Michael John Cusick, founder of Restoring the Soul and author of the new book Sacred Attachment: Escaping Spiritual Exhaustion and Trusting in Divine Love. Together, they explore the link between spiritual exhaustion and divine love, and how attachment, or the way we learn to connect and be connected, shapes our experience of God, ourselves, and one another. Michael shares pieces of his remarkable story: from surviving profound childhood trauma and addiction to...
info_outlineIf you’ve ever struggled to make space for your own grief—or wondered why so many people around you seem to push through pain without tending to it—this episode offers a compelling and liberating invitation.
Host Rachael Clinton Chen and guest co-host Wendell Moss sit down with Dr. Jamie Eaddy. Dr. Jamie is a thanatologist, which is a professional who studies and provides support related to death, dying, bereavement, and grief. She is also a grief and death doula, a healer, and the founder of The Ratchet Grief Project®. Jamie’s work centers especially on the Black community and other marginalized groups whose grief is often overlooked or dismissed. She invites us to see grief not as a private burden or spiritual failing, but as a sacred, communal, and even political process.
Together, they name the systems that make it hard for us to grieve—particularly in communities shaped by Christian triumphalism, generational survival strategies, systemic racism, and the pressure to “keep going” at all costs.
Dr. Jamie challenges death-dealing theologies that shame us for being human and normalize suffering as something deserved or redemptive. Instead, she offers a vision of a God who grows with us, who is expansive, and who longs for us to be fully alive.
This episode is a call to reclaim grief as part of what it means to be human—and to reimagine our faith, our communities, and our systems to reflect that truth. If you’re longing for permission to pause, to feel, and to be held in the midst of loss, we hope this conversation will meet you right where you are.