Stop Taking Things So personally for Improved Leadership Skills
The Business Mechanic Podcast with Vaughn Sigmon
Release Date: 11/20/2022
How to Have Difficult Conversations with Boss, Peer and Direct Report
The Business Mechanic Podcast with Vaughn Sigmon
One bad conversation can wreck a relationship you spent years building. In this episode I walk you through a practical roadmap for tough talks with direct reports, peers, and your boss so you protect respect, keep trust intact, and actually improve performance. You will get exact openers, EQ cues, and a simple four-step flow you can use today. What you will learn: Why mishandled conversations erode trust, clarity, and respect The landmines managers hit when emotions run high Scripted openers for direct reports, peers, and your boss How to tailor tone using DISC styles A...
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De-Escalation Playbook for Leaders
The Business Mechanic Podcast with Vaughn Sigmon
Ever had a conversation go nuclear in 60 seconds flat? You’re not alone. In this episode of The Business Mechanic Show, Vaughn Sigmon breaks down how great leaders turn explosive moments into opportunities for trust and clarity. Learn how to stop pouring gas on the fire and start becoming the calm thermostat your team needs when emotions run high. This is your playbook for defusing tension and keeping control. 🎯 Vaughn shares tactical phrases, body language tips, and science-backed techniques to help you cool the temperature before it ever hits boiling. Don’t just survive...
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The Right Way to Handle Conflict When Someone Is Clearly Wrong
The Business Mechanic Podcast with Vaughn Sigmon
In this power-packed episode of The Business Mechanic Show, Vaughn Sigmon uncovers the hidden fears behind why managers avoid difficult conversations—and gives you a bulletproof playbook for how to overcome them. From confronting an underperforming direct report to correcting a peer’s mistake, Vaughn explains how to step into these tough moments without triggering defensiveness or losing trust. You’ll learn the top 10 psychological blocks that cause avoidance and the exact dialogue strategies to lead through it with calm, curiosity, and authority. If you've ever avoided a tough...
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Own It: Leadership Through Ownership
The Business Mechanic Podcast with Vaughn Sigmon
In this episode of The Business Mechanic Show, the focus is all about real leadership—starting where excuses stop. It's a no-nonsense call to managers and leaders who are tired of feeling like they’re running an adult daycare. The message? Leadership isn’t about blame—it’s about ownership. And if you want better outcomes, stronger teams, and real respect, you’ve got to stop pointing fingers and start taking responsibility. This episode tackles the instinct to deflect and protect your ego when things go wrong. But growth, loyalty, and high performance don’t come from...
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How to Start Tough Conversations Without Triggering a Blow Up
The Business Mechanic Podcast with Vaughn Sigmon
How to Start Tough Conversations Without Triggering a Blow Up 📌 Episode Summary Most leaders avoid difficult conversations—and it’s costing them more than they realize. In this episode of The Business Mechanic Show, Vaughn Sigmon reveals why managers procrastinate tough talks, how silence signals approval of bad behavior, and the exact 3-step framework to handle any hard conversation with clarity, confidence, and calm. You’ll learn the psychology behind defensiveness, the Gallup data that proves employees want more feedback—not less—and why switching from monologue to...
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Stop Inventing Intentions
The Business Mechanic Podcast with Vaughn Sigmon
What if the biggest obstacle to a productive conversation… was the story in your head? In this powerful episode, the curtain gets pulled back on one of the most damaging habits in leadership: assuming intent. From ghosted emails to pushback in meetings, it’s easy to jump to conclusions. But when leaders start conversations like prosecutors instead of partners, trust erodes and productivity dies. The episode walks through how these mental shortcuts—called emotional reasoning—fuel defensiveness and kill collaboration. You’ll learn how to replace snap judgments with curiosity, defuse...
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How to Have Difficult Conversations Without Making These Three Big Mistakes
The Business Mechanic Podcast with Vaughn Sigmon
In this episode of the Business Mechanic Show, the three hidden layers of every difficult conversation are broken down with precision. What often starts as a simple discussion about performance or behavior can quickly escalate when deeper emotions and identity concerns go unrecognized. This episode dives deep into why most managers mishandle tough conversations—and how to shift from reactive manager to confident, emotionally intelligent leader. Listeners will explore the three essential layers beneath every challenging interaction: what happened, what was felt, and how identity was impacted....
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Why Most Managers Have Poor Outcomes From Difficult Conversations
The Business Mechanic Podcast with Vaughn Sigmon
This episode cuts straight to the heart of why difficult conversations so often go sideways for managers. It’s not just about saying the wrong thing—it’s about starting from the wrong mindset. Managers either avoid the talk entirely or come in too hot, trying to prove a point instead of seeking clarity. The result? Trust erodes, engagement drops, and the issue never really gets fixed. You’ll learn why your approach to tough conversations either builds connection or creates disconnection—and how to shift from defensiveness to curiosity. This episode introduces a better framework...
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How To Disagree Without Being A Jerk
The Business Mechanic Podcast with Vaughn Sigmon
Disagreements are inevitable—but conflict doesn’t have to be destructive. In this episode, you’ll learn how to handle tough conversations with calm, clarity, and confidence. This isn’t about avoiding conflict—it’s about navigating it with emotional intelligence and real leadership. The conversation covers practical steps to remain in control, de-escalate tension, and respond with intention instead of impulse. You’ll discover why so many managers struggle to lead in heated moments—and what you can do to become the voice of reason when emotions run high. Learn to pause, stay...
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How to Have Productive Conversations Without Losing Your Cool
The Business Mechanic Podcast with Vaughn Sigmon
In this episode of The Business Mechanic Show, we unpack what it really takes to navigate difficult conversations without losing your cool. This isn’t about walking in with a perfect script or powering through on assumptions. It’s about letting go of the need to be right—and embracing the discipline to actually listen, lead, and respond with clarity. The episode walks through a proven framework to help leaders avoid emotional landmines, reduce resistance, and create lasting influence through productive dialogue. You’ll learn how to stay calm when emotions run high, how to set up...
info_outlineCommunication is essential to the human experience and being a great leader. This short podcast wants to carve out the topic of taking things too personally and tie it to the topic of difficult conversations. In my podcast on difficult conversations, you may remember that you want to avoid any pre-determined perceptions at all costs. Go into any tough conversation with an open mind. If not, you will wind up feeling stressed out, unhappy, and anxious over conversations; AND you may be taking things a little too personally all the time.
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In fact, communication skills are an important and often neglected part of guiding yourself to highly effective leadership. Guarding happiness and regulating emotions can be difficult if you don't stop projecting insecurities onto those around you and assuming the worst.
So how can you relearn communication skills that will decrease stress and anxiety and improve your overall happiness? Leading to be a much more confident leader.
“Don't take anything personally.”
What that means is ... realize nothing other people do is because of you. This powerful best practice acts as a reminder that self-limiting beliefs rob you of confidence. And will create needless self-doubt. This best practice is so simple yet so profound: Safeguard your mind from unnecessary emotional rollercoaster rides.
You can apply this best practice to every facet of your life, including your work life, love life, dealing with your kids, your parents, your neighbor, your boss, the person at the grocery store … the list goes on.
Let me share a formula to deal with potentially hurtful behavior from others, boiling it down to You have a choice on how to interpret events and feedback from people. You see, Each person sees the world in a unique way, so how others treat us says more about them than it does about you.
Realize that each person has a subjective reality and that their views are only their views. No facts about who you are and aren’t based on your truth. In other words, you don't have to believe them.
Limiting beliefs control your reality. Many limiting beliefs stem from a casual comment someone made that you internalized or took as truth.
People project their personal hurts, wounds, and stories onto the person they are talking to. The guide is to remind you that, in part, everyone is walking around projecting, so remember not to take things personally. Meaning that whatever the person is saying is most likely more about them than you.
OK, so now you understand the best practice of not taking things personally. But ... you’re human. how do you reduce stress and conflict and improve confidence in your life with this method?
Here are 4 ways to stop taking things so personally:
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