loader from loading.io

Custody & the Primary Carer: How to Protect Yourself & Your Kids In FAMILY LAW

The Divorce Course Podcast

Release Date: 09/09/2025

Coercive Control & Domestic Violence in Family Court: Should You Raise It or Stay Silent? show art Coercive Control & Domestic Violence in Family Court: Should You Raise It or Stay Silent?

The Divorce Course Podcast

🎧 Listen to this episode if: You want to understand if domestic violence can affect your property or parenting outcome You've been told by a lawyer to "leave the family violence out" of your case You're scared raising coercive control or domestic violence will backfire on you in mediation You're confused by social media saying the courts ignore family violence Your ex is still using coercive behaviour even after separation You're heading into mediation or court and don't know how to bring it up   ⚠️ Legal Disclaimer & Family Violence Trigger Warning This episode...

info_outline Divorce Money Mistakes: What Financial Planners Know That You Don’t show art Divorce Money Mistakes: What Financial Planners Know That You Don’t

The Divorce Course Podcast

🎧 Listen to this episode if: You’re about to go through property settlement in divorce You’re focused on the percentage but unsure what it actually means You’re dealing with complex finances (trusts, companies, super, shares) or Simple Property Settlement You want to avoid making a financial mistake that costs you years You’re wondering whether to take the house, cash, super or investments   ⚖️ Legal Disclaimer & ⚠️ Family Violence Trigger Warning This episode contains discussion of family violence, coercive control, and financial control, which may be...

info_outline Furniture in Divorce: Who Gets What & Costly Mistakes to Avoid show art Furniture in Divorce: Who Gets What & Costly Mistakes to Avoid

The Divorce Course Podcast

🎧 Listen to this episode if: You’re arguing over furniture or household items in divorce Your ex has taken everything or won’t give anything back You’ve been told “you can’t take anything if you leave” You want to avoid wasting money on legal fees over small items You’re trying to work out what’s actually fair vs worth fighting for Legal Disclaimer & Family Violence Trigger Warning This episode contains discussion of family violence, coercive control, and separation dynamics, which may be distressing for some listeners. If you are unsafe, do not attempt to...

info_outline Health and Divorce: How Illness May Affect Property Settlement Percentage show art Health and Divorce: How Illness May Affect Property Settlement Percentage

The Divorce Course Podcast

🎧 Listen to this episode if: You or your ex has a serious illness or disability You’ve been a carer during the relationship You have ongoing medical expenses You’re worried about future financial support after separation You want to understand how courts assess health in property settlement ⚖️ Legal Disclaimer This podcast is for educational purposes only and provides general information about Australian family law. It is not legal advice. Every situation is different, and you should seek independent professional guidance for your circumstances.     What...

info_outline Is Your Ex Watching You? Coercive control goes digital. show art Is Your Ex Watching You? Coercive control goes digital.

The Divorce Course Podcast

🎧 Listen to this episode if: You feel like your ex knows things they shouldn’t You suspect you’re being tracked, monitored, or watched You’re going through separation and worried about digital safety Your ex had access to your devices, passwords, or accounts You want to protect yourself and your children from tech-based abuse What if your ex knew where you were… who you were talking to… and what you were saying — without you ever telling them? In this episode, we’re joined by Catherine Plunkett, Director of Safety Net Australia at WESNET, to unpack the growing...

info_outline Refusing 50/50 Care? What to Do in Mediation When Your Child's Safety Comes First show art Refusing 50/50 Care? What to Do in Mediation When Your Child's Safety Comes First

The Divorce Course Podcast

🎧 Listen to this episode if: You’ve been told to attend mediation but feel unsafe agreeing to child care arrangements Your ex is pushing for 50/50 care and you don’t believe it’s appropriate for the kids You’re dealing with substance abuse, family violence, or safety concerns and your child's safety You feel pressured to compromise at mediation when you don’t want to You want to understand your options without giving in on safety Have you been told you need to go to mediation, but you’re worried about the outcome because you simply cannot budge when it comes to your...

info_outline The Parenting Order Loopholes Your Ex Might Exploit (And How to Close Them) show art The Parenting Order Loopholes Your Ex Might Exploit (And How to Close Them)

The Divorce Course Podcast

🎧 Listen to this episode if: You are about to negotiate parenting orders or a parenting plan Your coparent is high conflict, manipulative or controlling You’re worried they will twist agreements or exploit loopholes You’re preparing for mediation or family court for parenting orders You want parenting orders that actually reduce future arguments Family Violence & Legal Disclaimer This episode contains discussion of family conflict and family violence which may be distressing for some listeners.If you are experiencing family violence or feel unsafe, please contact...

info_outline Can I Make My Ex Leave the House? 5 Strategies After Separation show art Can I Make My Ex Leave the House? 5 Strategies After Separation

The Divorce Course Podcast

🎧 Listen to this episode if: You are separated but still living under the same roof as your ex You feel stuck in the house and don’t know how to move forward You want to know what an ouster order is You want to understand sole occupancy Someone told you if you leave the house you will lose your rights to it You want to understand what you can legally do to create space after separation Your ex refuses to move out and you don’t know what your options are You’re wondering whether you can make your ex leave the house You’re dealing with a manipulative, avoidant,...

info_outline When It’s Not Just Conflict: How Coercive Control Shows Up in Divorce show art When It’s Not Just Conflict: How Coercive Control Shows Up in Divorce

The Divorce Course Podcast

🎧 Listen to this episode if: You’re unsure whether what you experienced was abuse You’ve heard the term “coercive control” but don’t fully understand it You feel confused, guilty or constantly off balance in your relationship Negotiations during separation feel manipulative rather than constructive You’re worried about how coercive control affects children You want clarity and validation around your experience This episode discusses family violence and may be triggering for some listeners. If you need support, please reach out to 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) or Lifeline (13 11...

info_outline When In-Laws Interfere in Your Divorce (What You Have to Respond To) show art When In-Laws Interfere in Your Divorce (What You Have to Respond To)

The Divorce Course Podcast

🎧 Listen to this episode if… ● Your ex’s parents or extended family are texting, pressuring or negotiating on their behalf ● Grandparents are demanding time with your children ● You’re being accused of owing money that was supposedly a “gift” ● You’re dealing with coercive control through third parties ● You feel like you’re negotiating with an entire extended family ● You’re unsure what you legally have to respond to ● Your mediation agreements change after your ex speaks to their family ● You want clear boundaries and practical guidance during separation If...

info_outline
 
More Episodes

🎧 Listen to This Episode If…

👩‍👧 You’re in a custody dispute and want to show the court you’re the primary carer

⚖️ You’re unsure what “primary carer” really means under family law

📚 You need to know what kind of evidence proves you’ve been the day-to-day parent

😟 You’re worried your ex is twisting the truth about who cares for the kids

📝 You want practical tips on documenting your role as the main caregiver

🏛️ You’re preparing for mediation or family court and want to feel more confident

💡 You want to understand how judges assess who the primary carer is

⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode discusses family and domestic violence, coercive control, and financial abuse.
📌 Legal Disclaimer: This episode is for general information only and is not legal advice. Please seek independent advice for your specific situation.

primary carer. What does it actually mean? How do courts define it? Why does it matter so much in custody battles and interim hearings? And most importantly, how can you prove you’ve been the primary carer if your ex tries to rewrite history?

We unpack the recent changes in family law in Australia, the shift away from the old 50/50 presumption, and why the courts now focus on the best interests of the children over parental entitlement. Along the way, we share practical examples, strategies for gathering evidence, and insights into how controlling or manipulative ex-partners sometimes exploit this concept.

Whether you’re negotiating custody in mediation, preparing for court, or simply trying to understand your rights, this episode is for you.

⏱️ Episode Timeline – What We Discuss

  • 00:00 – What does “primary carer” mean in divorce and custody cases?

  • 02:08 – How do courts define the role of a primary carer in family law?

  • 03:46 – What changes in family law affect interim parenting orders?

  • 06:50 – How do judges decide the “best interests of the children”?

  • 16:07 – How can you prove you are the primary carer in custody disputes?

  • 23:13 – What practical steps help parents show primary carer status?

  • 23:37 – When should you seek legal or psychological support in custody battles?

  • 23:48 – How do you handle high-conflict separations in family court?

  • 24:07 – What role do parenting plans play in custody and court proceedings?

  • 25:38 – How does family violence impact child custody decisions?

  • 28:01 – Do grandparents and babysitters count in proving primary carer status?

  • 30:29 – What is the “first right of refusal” in custody arrangements?

  • 34:39 – What evidence do you need to prove you’re the main carer for your children?

  • 41:59 – Final thoughts and encouragement for parents in custody cases

 

📌 Links & Resources Mentioned

 

 

🆘 Support Services

💜 1800 RESPECT – Domestic and Family Violence Support
📞 Lifeline – 13 11 14 (24/7 Crisis Support)
⚖️ Legal Aid – Visit your state’s Legal Aid website
👧 Kids Helpline – 1800 55 1800