loader from loading.io

S3E15 - How Medical Trauma Impacts Power and Behavior in Kids

Play Therapy Parenting Podcast

Release Date: 11/28/2025

S3E40 - The Roller Coaster of Child Counseling Progress show art S3E40 - The Roller Coaster of Child Counseling Progress

Play Therapy Parenting Podcast

In this episode of the Parent Companion for Play Therapy series, I explain why a child’s growth and healing process is not linear, even though we often expect it to be. As adults, we tend to think in straight lines—progress should move steadily forward. But children don’t think or process that way. As they work through emotions and experiences, their path looks much more like a roller coaster, with twists, turns, and moments that feel like they’re going backward. What can feel confusing or discouraging is often a normal part of how children process and grow. I walk through how to...

info_outline
S3E39 - Child S3E39 - Child "Stealing": Why It Happens and How to Handle It

Play Therapy Parenting Podcast

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom about her child taking things that don’t belong to her. I explain that while this behavior can feel alarming, it is actually very common in childhood and is usually tied to development, impulse, and a child’s desire to meet a need in the moment. Children often understand that taking things is wrong, but they don’t yet have the ability to reason through that impulse or regulate it effectively. What looks like stealing is often a combination of desire, limited self-control, and not yet having the words to express what they want or feel. I...

info_outline
S3E38 - The Wave Model: From Tsunami to Tide show art S3E38 - The Wave Model: From Tsunami to Tide

Play Therapy Parenting Podcast

In this episode of the Parent Companion for Play Therapy series, I introduce a visual way to understand your child’s behavior before and after child-centered play therapy — what I call The Wave Model: From Tsunami to Tide. Before children develop the skills to regulate, communicate, and make sense of their emotions, their behavior often shows up in extremes. The highs are very high, the lows are very low, and everything feels intense, overwhelming, and difficult to manage. As children build emotional vocabulary, regulation, self-esteem, and a broader understanding of their world, those...

info_outline
S3E37 - The Pendulum Swing: Why Kids Go to Extremes Before They Find Balance show art S3E37 - The Pendulum Swing: Why Kids Go to Extremes Before They Find Balance

Play Therapy Parenting Podcast

In this episode, I explain the concept of the pendulum swing and why it is such an important picture for understanding what happens in child-centered play therapy. When children have felt powerless in everyday life, the permissive playroom gives them a chance to experience the opposite. They are allowed to take charge, make decisions, and even swing all the way into dictatorial power. That can look extreme, but it is actually part of the healing process. Children are testing what power feels like because they have spent so much of life feeling like they had none. Over time, they discover that...

info_outline
S3E36 - The Anger Iceberg: What Your Child Is Really Feeling show art S3E36 - The Anger Iceberg: What Your Child Is Really Feeling

Play Therapy Parenting Podcast

In this episode, I explain the concept of the anger iceberg and how it completely changes the way we understand our children’s behavior. What we see on the surface—yelling, hitting, defiance, aggression—is often just a small piece of what’s actually going on. Underneath that anger is something much bigger: hurt, disappointment, fear, frustration, or overwhelm. Kids don’t choose anger because it’s accurate—they choose it because it feels powerful and helps them avoid vulnerability. When we only react to the anger, we miss what our child is really trying to communicate. But when we...

info_outline
S3E35 - How Birth Order Shapes Your Child’s Personality show art S3E35 - How Birth Order Shapes Your Child’s Personality

Play Therapy Parenting Podcast

In this episode of the Parent Companion for Play Therapy series, I walk you through how birth order shapes your child’s personality—and why that matters more than most parents realize. I explain the common tendencies of oldest, middle, and youngest children, and how the dynamics between siblings influence behavior, motivation, and relationships. When you understand birth order, so many things start to make sense—why one child is driven and responsible, another is social and carefree, and another seeks connection outside the family. I also talk about something many parents don’t...

info_outline
S3E34 - Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Why Kids Melt Down (And What It Actually Means) show art S3E34 - Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Why Kids Melt Down (And What It Actually Means)

Play Therapy Parenting Podcast

In this episode of the Parent Companion for Play Therapy series, I explain one of the most important mindset shifts we can make as parents: behavior is communication. When children don’t yet have an emotional vocabulary, they can’t tell us what they’re feeling—they have to show us. That’s why big emotions often come out as tantrums, aggression, or seemingly irrational behavior. What looks like “misbehavior” is often just a child overwhelmed by feelings they don’t understand and don’t know how to express. I walk through how emotional vocabulary changes everything. When...

info_outline
S3E33 - Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Helping Children Build Healthy Self-Esteem show art S3E33 - Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Helping Children Build Healthy Self-Esteem

Play Therapy Parenting Podcast

In this episode of the Parent Companion for Play Therapy series, I talk about self-esteem, the seventh and final common issue that often brings children into child-centered play therapy. Self-esteem isn’t something children are born with—it develops over time as they begin to understand who they are and what they are capable of. When a child struggles with self-esteem, you often see hesitation, self-doubt, and social difficulties because it’s hard for a child to connect with others when they don’t yet have a clear sense of themselves. I explain how child-centered play therapy helps...

info_outline
S3E32 - ADHD Diagnosis: What Parents Need to Think Through show art S3E32 - ADHD Diagnosis: What Parents Need to Think Through

Play Therapy Parenting Podcast

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom who is trying to decide whether to pursue an ADHD evaluation for her six-year-old while he is already in play therapy. I walk through the larger issue many parents face — the pressure to evaluate, diagnose, and medicate quickly — and how that differs from a child-centered approach that looks at the whole child first. I explain why behavior should never be reduced to a snapshot moment in time and why dysregulation, anxiety, power struggles, and lack of emotional vocabulary can often look like ADHD on the surface.  I also clarify that an...

info_outline
S3E31 - Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Relational Struggles (When Kids Have Trouble Connecting) show art S3E31 - Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Relational Struggles (When Kids Have Trouble Connecting)

Play Therapy Parenting Podcast

In this episode of the Parent Companion for Play Therapy series, I talk about relational issues — when children struggle socially, don’t seem to connect with peers, or have difficulty maintaining friendships. I explain that these struggles are often rooted in a lack of identity or self-concept. When a child doesn’t know who they are, they try on different roles from day to day, which makes it hard for other children to relate to them. In other cases, a child may have a consistent pattern of maladaptive behavior that creates distance in relationships.  I walk through how...

info_outline
 
More Episodes

In this episode, I respond to a parent who’s navigating a long list of confusing behaviors with her six-year-old — from struggles with socks and underwear to bedtime battles, toileting challenges, emotional outbursts, and power struggles throughout the day. I explain how all of these issues point back to one core theme: control. Children only have control over a few things in their world, and when life feels overwhelming or unpredictable — especially for a child with medical trauma — they hold on tightly wherever they can.

I walk through why these behaviors make sense, how medical experiences amplify a child’s need for power, and why so many of the “sensory” issues parents describe are actually tied to anxiety and emotional sensitivity. I also offer guidance on how to shift language around limits, how to understand masking behaviors, and why returning to child-centered play therapy may be helpful as he continues processing what he’s been through.

Ask Me Questions:  Call ‪(813) 812-5525‬, or email: brenna@thekidcounselor.com
My Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids - https://a.co/d/bThnKH9
Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/
My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/
My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/

Common References:
Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge.
Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.