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Beyond Consent: Rethinking Sex, Power, and Justice - a conversation with Danielle Tumminio Hansen

Where Do We Go From Here?

Release Date: 08/06/2025

On Premarital Sex Part 4: Sin or Not a Sin? show art On Premarital Sex Part 4: Sin or Not a Sin?

Where Do We Go From Here?

In Part 4 of our On Premarital Sex series, Jess and Devi wrap up the conversations that have taken over your DMs and headphones all month long. After exploring progressive sexual ethics with Mathias Roberts, vocational celibacy with Peter Valk and Dr. Dani Treweek, and abstinence as a chosen path, this final episode brings everything together. This is the debrief: ✨ What the history of contraception has to do with Christian sexual ethics today ✨ Why the church’s teachings rarely match the actual behaviour of Christians ✨ Staggering data on premarital sex among churchgoing Christians...

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Where Do We Go From Here?

In Part 3 of our most-downloaded series On Premarital Sex, Jess and Debbie return to the conversation that shaped so much of this podcast’s early years: How do you make sexual decisions when you’ve left purity culture behind? This episode features psychotherapist and author Mathias Roberts (Beyond Shame), who helps us unpack: ✨ Why “premeditation” isn’t sinful — and why preparing (with protection, consent, communication) is essential for safety and flourishing. ✨ A harm-based definition of sexual sin that moves beyond black-and-white rules. ✨ Why sex without vulnerability...

info_outline On Premarital Sex Part 2: Reimagining Celibacy show art On Premarital Sex Part 2: Reimagining Celibacy

Where Do We Go From Here?

In Part 2 of our most-downloaded series On Premarital Sex, Jess and Debbie turn the conversation toward the other side of the sexual ethics spectrum: celibacy. After exploring progressive sexual ethics with Mathias Roberts in Part 1, this episode asks a different set of questions: What does celibacy really mean? How is celibacy different from abstinence? Can celibacy be a dignified, intentional Christian calling—not just the default for “other people”? And what does celibacy look like for straight Christians, queer Christians, divorced Christians, widows, and everyone in between?...

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Where Do We Go From Here?

In this re-release of one of our most downloaded series, Jess and Debbie revisit a conversation listeners return to again and again: What does a Christian sexual ethic look like after purity culture—especially when it comes to premarital sex? Joined by psychotherapist and author Mathias Roberts (Beyond Shame), Jess explores the shift many Christians face when leaving the purity culture framework behind. If you've ever wondered: How do I make sexual decisions without the old rulebook? What counts as “sexual sin” if I don’t use purity-culture categories? How do I navigate shame,...

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Where Do We Go From Here?

In this episode of Where Do We Go From Here?, Jessica sits down with somatic sexologist Lydia Adéla to explore how embodiment, safety, and self-awareness can transform our experience of sexuality. Lydia shares her journey from believing she was “broken” and unable to feel pleasure, to becoming a practitioner who helps others reconnect to their bodies and experience intimacy without shame. Together, Jessica and Lydia unpack how religious conditioning, purity culture, and unrealistic media portrayals shape our sexual disconnection—and how we can begin to heal. This is a powerful and...

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Where Do We Go From Here?

In this month’s Thoughts & Prayers, Jess and EDJ dive into what’s been stirring in our community conversations — from purity-culture myths about “saving sex for marriage” to what it means to reclaim feminine wisdom in a patriarchal church. The hosts reflect on the latest No Hard Feelings discussion about abstinence and sexual compatibility, explore how our theology has shaped women’s bodies and pleasure, and unpack insights from Edie J’s interview with Angela J Harrington, author of Embracing the Odd Witch in the Woods. They also take listener questions from Reddit —...

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Where Do We Go From Here?

In this episode, EDJ talks with Angela Herrington, author of Embracing the Old Witch in the Woods: Decolonizing the Sacred Feminine and Reclaiming Your Power. Together, they explore what it means to reconnect with feminine wisdom in a world shaped by patriarchy and Christian purity culture. Angela unpacks: The witch as a metaphor for women’s ancestral wisdom and strength How patriarchy and colonialism vilified feminine power and indigenous knowledge Why rage and pleasure are essential parts of healing The truth about Christian teachings on submission and mutuality How epigenetics...

info_outline Does Saving Sex for Marriage Set People Up for Better or Worse Sex? - A No Hard Feelings Chat show art Does Saving Sex for Marriage Set People Up for Better or Worse Sex? - A No Hard Feelings Chat

Where Do We Go From Here?

In this month’s No Hard Feelings, Jessica, Emily, and Kristen take a deep dive into one of purity culture’s biggest promises — that saving sex for marriage leads to better, holier, and more satisfying sex. Spoiler: the data (and lived experience) tell a different story. They explore: The “sexual prosperity gospel” and why it set so many up for shame and disappointment Sheila Wray Gregoire’s landmark Great Sex Rescue study of 20,000 evangelical women The “flip-switch myth” and how lack of education and consent led to painful first experiences The 47% orgasm gap and how...

info_outline Nobody Wants This Season 1 Recap show art Nobody Wants This Season 1 Recap

Where Do We Go From Here?

In this fun and thoughtful Where Do We Go From Here? conversation, Jessica and Devi revisit one of their favourite RomCom Recap episodes from Patreon — a deep dive into the Netflix hit Nobody Wants This, starring Kristen Bell and Adam Brody. They explore why this show hit such a cultural nerve, how it portrays the complexity of love between two people from different faiths, and what it teaches us about emotional honesty, boundaries, and belonging. From the “hot rabbi” to the spiral-inducing unanswered text, Jessica and Devi unpack how Nobody Wants This manages to make relationships feel...

info_outline Why ‘Waiting on God’s Timing’ Keeps Women Stuck and other thoughts show art Why ‘Waiting on God’s Timing’ Keeps Women Stuck and other thoughts

Where Do We Go From Here?

In this reflective and wide-ranging Thoughts & Prayers episode, Jessica and EDJ explore the intersection of politics, faith, and deconstruction — from the rise of Christian nationalism in the U.S. to the way purity culture still shapes dating and marriage expectations today. Together, they talk about: How Christian nationalism differs between Australia and the U.S. What the Charlie Kirk controversy reveals about polarization and online discourse. Learning when to disengage from unproductive debates — and how that can be an act of wisdom, not defeat. Why waiting for “God’s...

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Content Warnings:
This episode discusses rape, sexual assault, purity culture, childhood sexual harm, and childbirth trauma. Listener discretion is advised.

In this deeply moving and thought-provoking conversation, EDJ is joined by theologian and author Danielle Tumminio Hansen to explore how our language, theology, and justice systems often fail survivors of sexual harm. Drawing from her groundbreaking book Speaking of Rape, Danielle discusses the need to reframe how we talk about rape, the myths of the "perfect victim" and the "obvious perpetrator," and the damaging intersections between purity culture and rape culture.

This episode also tackles the importance of sex education, why impact matters more than intent, how restorative justice offers an alternative to punishment-based systems, and what it means to raise children with justice and empathy in mind. Danielle shares from her own story with remarkable vulnerability, offering theological, psychological, and cultural insight that’s both challenging and deeply hopeful.

Topics Discussed:

  • Why our words around sexual harm often fall short

  • The myths of the "perfect victim" and "clear perpetrator"

  • How purity culture contributes to victim-blaming

  • Redefining rape through agency, power, and desire

  • The role of sex education in prevention

  • Restorative justice vs. retributive justice

  • Why survivors' stories reshape culture

  • Teaching justice through parenting

  • Autonomy, agency, and interdependence

  • Understanding impact over intent

Resources Mentioned:

  • Speaking of Rape by Danielle Tumminio Hansen

  • South of Forgiveness by Thordis Elva & Tom Stranger

  • Know My Name by Chanel Miller

  • Works by theologian Sally McFague and philosopher Linda Alcoff

  • Research on contact theory and restorative justice

 

🇦🇺 Australia

🇺🇸 United States

  • RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network)
    Operates the National Sexual Assault Hotline.

  • Other National Helplines

    • Love Is Respect: For teens and young adults experiencing dating violence.

      • 📞 Call: 1-866-331-9474

      • 💬 Text: Text "LOVEIS" to 22522

      • 💬 Online chat: loveisrespect.org

    • National Domestic Violence Hotline: For domestic violence support.

      • 📞 Call: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)

      • 💬 Text: Text "START" to 88788

      • 💬 Online chat: thehotline.org

    • Crisis Text Line: For general crisis support.

      • 💬 Text: Text "HOME" to 741741

🇬🇧 United Kingdom

🇨🇦 Canada