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276 How to Navigate Your Healing Journey: What Helps and What Holds You Back?

Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Release Date: 07/25/2024

300 How to Transform Body Image Wounds into Sacred Scars with God's Healing show art 300 How to Transform Body Image Wounds into Sacred Scars with God's Healing

Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary:  Research suggests that girls as young as three years old prioritize beauty, and children in elementary school frequently exhibit body image issues. In this episode of Your Hope Filled Perspective, I chatted with Heather Creekmore of Compared to Who about the pain, wounds, and ultimately, sacred scars, she experienced as a result of body image issues starting in childhood. Together, we explore how God's healing can transform body image wounds into sacred scars, offering hope and freedom. Quotables from the episode: I really believed I had the perfect life, and yet, I...

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Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary:  As a new year approaches, many of us feel pressured to make big changes and set ambitious resolutions. But what if God is calling us to be faithful in the work we’re already doing? In this episode, we explore how faithfulness in our current season can bring deeper fulfillment, peace, and a stronger sense of purpose than constantly striving for the next goal.   Quotables from the episode: Today we're going to be talking about faithfulness over resolutions, embracing God's path for you right now. As we enter into this new year, many of us feel pressured to make big...

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Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary:  For many, the holiday season is synonymous with joy, family, and celebration. But for others, it brings a heavy reminder of loss and sorrow. Grief can take many forms—the loss of a loved one, a relationship that ended, or even a dream that was never realized. Today, we will navigate this journey together and explore how, even in the midst of grief, we can find glimpses of hope. You are not alone in this, and we’ll spend time talking about practical strategies, share stories, and dig into Scripture to see what God says about our pain. Quotables from the episode: I...

info_outline 297 Word of the Year or Not? How to Reflect, Grow, and Plan Without the Pressure show art 297 Word of the Year or Not? How to Reflect, Grow, and Plan Without the Pressure

Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary:  The end of the year often brings about a time of reflection over our growth and achievements from the past year, as well as dreaming and planning for the next year. A popular practice at the start of a new year is to choose “a word of the year” to guide our focus, goals, and resolutions for the next year. For some, this is a rewarding and encouraging practice. For others, it leads to guilt and shame when they don’t have a word of the year.  In this episode, Dr. Michelle and Rev. Jessica share their experience with the practice, as well as several alternatives...

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Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary:  Continuing in our “Sacred Scar Story Series,” in this episode I chatted with Veronica Sites, who shared about the pain and wounds she endured that culminated in her believing the lies that she would be better off dead. She attempted to eliminate her life, but God had other plans. Now she shares the sacred scar that God is using to educate the church and leaders about how to respond in such a mental health crisis. Quotables from the episode: If you have ever experienced depression or anxiety, or suffered the loss of a friend or loved one to death by suicide, then...

info_outline 295 How To Celebrate the Holidays with Hope, Even When Life Isn’t Merry show art 295 How To Celebrate the Holidays with Hope, Even When Life Isn’t Merry

Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary: Reverend Jessica Van Roekel joins me as a co-host as we take on the challenge of how to celebrate the holidays with hope, even when life isn’t merry. They explore common struggles such as grief, unmet expectations, loneliness, and the pressures of maintaining traditions. Offering both spiritual and practical tips, they share how to hold joy and sorrow simultaneously, lean into God's presence, and embrace meaningful rest during this season. Whether you're personally struggling or know someone who is, this episode provides encouragement and tangible ways to navigate the season...

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Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary: As the holidays approach and we’re inundated with messages about thankfulness, you may wonder: does gratitude actually change anything? Is there science behind the old advice to “count your blessings”? In this episode of Your Hope-Filled Perspective, I’m diving into the connection between Gratitude and Neuroscience, showing how adopting a heart of gratitude impacts not just our spiritual lives but also our mental and physical health. Scripture reminds us that what God commands aligns beautifully with how He created us. I’ll share 25+ unique things to be grateful for...

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Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary:  In this episode of the Sacred Scar Story Series on Your Hope-Filled Perspective, I had the opportunity to talk with Becky Beresford about a significant time in her life when things didn’t go as she hoped and meticulously planned. She experienced physical, emotional, relational, and spiritual pain. She shares how her first pregnancy was fraught with complications, leading to grief, loss, and deep wounds. Becky discusses how she learned to trust God through her struggles and how He brought healing, leaving her with beautiful sacred scars as a reminder of His...

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Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary:  In this Sacred Scar Story, we hear from Lori Wildenberg who faced the unimaginable pain of nearly losing her daughter to depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts. She shares how her faith and God’s presence guided her through this dark journey, ultimately bringing healing to both her daughter and herself. This story of resilience and hope offers encouragement for anyone navigating similar struggles. Quotables from the episode: Wounds have to be uncovered and cleaned out before real healing can take place. With great pain often comes fear, which can paralyze us and...

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Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary: Our guest on this episode, Kathy Collard Miller, was raised by a very angry mother. The more Kathy tried to suppress her anger, the more it surfaced. Over time, Kathy found herself expressing her anger toward her husband and her daughter, and in her own words, abusing her daughter. Kathy shares her painful wounds in this episode, as well as the story of redemption and the beautiful sacred scars God has given her. Quotables from the episode: Sometimes when we talk about pain or wounds, that pain comes at the hand of another. Sometimes we have no explanation for why it happens...

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Episode Summary: 

We’re in the midst of the Sacred Scars Stories Series, during which I’m talking to real people who have experienced real pain, real wounds, and come out on the other side of healing with beautiful sacred scars to show for it. This week, I’m talking with author, trauma-informed life coach, Janell Rardon, seeking her perspective as a mental health professional regarding what prevents people from seeking healing as well as key steps or activities to help in our healing journey. 


Quotables from the episode:

  • God didn’t create us to go through difficult experiences alone.
  • Asking God “Why did this happen” is rarely of much help. The answer to “why?” doesn’t really satisfy our longing and pain, but there are other questions that are more helpful.
  • A wound is something that disrupts life. It stops you in your tracks and disrupts forward motion and causes pain.
  • We have jarring experiences that interrupt the normal flow, and perhaps interrupts our ability to cope with normal life, and causes physical, emotional, relational, or spiritual pain.
  • On the other hand, a scar is actually a healed wound. Scars don’t erase the memory of the pain from the wound, but they don’t allow the pain to take up the same real estate anymore because healing has taken place.
  • The book Sacred Scars highlights we as humans hurt, and are susceptible to the lies of the enemy. The enemy is referred to as The Father of Lies and as The Accuser of the Brethren. He is constantly whispering in our ears that we aren’t loveable, we can’t be forgiven, and that we have no value, no worth, and no purpose and that we deserve the pain we experience.
  • I’ve had a tendency in the past to look at my scars as an ugly reminder of the pain I have gone through. My hope is that readers of Sacred Scars can get to the point that they no longer look at their scars with disdain but as something beautiful that shows that they have overcome and that there is no shame to those scars.
  • If we can make that shift from shaming or shameful to sacred, then we have won the victory.
  • Shame is liars language, whereas grace is the language of love. If we are filtering our wounded experience through the hands of a Father God who loves us, then He is the one who will help us get from a place of shame to a sacred place.
  • I was so ashamed of my physical scars. I had heard the verse that I was fearfully and wonderfully made. But because my deformity occurred after birth, I could not fathom how God could find it beautiful or wonderful, so I couldn’t either.
  • What brought about healing in my heart was when I read over the resurrection story in the Bible and realized that Jesus still had his scars in his resurrected body. Those scars were beautiful and served the purpose of proving that He was who He said He was and that He had done what He said He would do. In the same way, our scars are beautiful and serve a redemptive purpose.
  • There are primarily four things that prevent people from seeking healing for their painful wounds: 1) Pride 2) Shame 3) Fear and 4) Discomfort
    • Pride says, “I’ve got this.”
    • Shame says, “I am a mistake.”
    • Fear says, “I’m afraid of the future.”
    • Discomfort says, “I’m uncomfortable with others knowing the worst part of me.
  • It takes courage to say, “I need help here” with a wise, discerning purpose who can make space for you and your healing.
  • As a mental health professional, nothing our patients say surprises us anymore. We’ve heard just about everything and just want to help our patients through it, knowing that when they share their darkest secrets and bring them into the light, they no longer hold the power over them.
  • Once we let the light in, shame has to flee!
  • No one comes into our office because everything is going well. Once they share, relief sets in because once they share their pain, they realize it was not as bad as they expected.
  • Some things that help our healing journey are: find things that bring joy and a sense of equanimity, find ways to play and find pleasure, destress and stop the flood of cortisol, live from a place of pre-forgiveness.
  • When we don’t find healing, our brain continues to live from a state of emergency.
  • Extend as much grace to yourself that you would extend to your best friend.
  • God did not create us as human doings. He created us as human beings. He wants us just to be.
  • When reconciliation is impossible, remember that greatest amount of work being done is in you, and that will help you the most in the long run.
  • Live from a state of pre-forgiveness, which means humans will inevitably hurt us, so we look at them having already decided to forgive things they would say or do that would hurt me. Remember, everyone is hurting from something, and hurt people hurt other people.
  • The foundation of our sacred scars is in getting to know who we really are, as God created us.
  • We cannot change another person, but we can work on our own healing and our own wellness.
  • Often, wanting revenge, prevents our own healing. It’s a natural thing to want but detrimental to our own healing.
  • Revenge comes when we are so deeply hurt that we want another to hurt as badly as we do so that they can understand how we feel.
  • God says in his Word, “Vengeance is mine.”
  • We will never fully heal as long as we are harboring bitterness, resentment, and unforgiveness not just toward others, but toward ourselves or God. We are often the hardest person for us to forgive.


Scripture References:

  • Romans 12:17-19 NKJV “Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.   Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord.  

 

Recommended Resources: 

 

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Connect with Janell Rardon:

Website / Facebook / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Guest:

Author Janell Rardon is a trauma-informed, board-certified life coach specializing in family systems. Her latest book, Stronger Every Day: 9 Tools for an Emotionally Healthy You, helps bridge the gap between faith and mental health. Her newest title, "Grandmother," is the greatest blessing. Visit janellrardon.com for more free resources.

 

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson
Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson