Episode 324: Why Motivators Work Better Than Punishments for Kids With Big Emotions
Release Date: 09/19/2024
Episode 347: How to Feel More Confident When Responding to Kids' Reactions (Especially Negativity)
Your Parenting Long Game
Many kids with big emotions seem to default to negativity—even after a day full of fun and connection. When we witness their lack of positivity, we often think things like, “Why can’t they just be happy?” or “Why are they acting so spoiled?” We feel frustrated that their mood can derail the whole family’s energy, and we feel helpless to do anything about it. But we are not helpless! In this episode, you’ll learn: Exactly kids focus on what went wrong, even when so much went right How we keep ourselves stuck in a cycle of negativity – and a simple way to break free ...
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Episode 346: Stop Telling Your Anxious Child That Things Will Be Ok (What They Need Instead)
Your Parenting Long Game
Many children with big emotions also struggle with anxious thoughts. When our child feels scared, nervous, or overwhelmed, our first instinct is usually to reassure them that everything will be okay. But what if we are actually making it HARDER for them to feel better in the moment and build resilience for the future? In this episode, you’ll learn: Why, in our defense, we’re wired reassure our children when they feel anxious What happens in our kids’ brains when we reassure them (and why they often feel more anxious after we try to help) Three things our children...
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Episode 345: Responding to Snarky Responses Like “This is STUPID”
Your Parenting Long Game
When we see our kids struggling with things like schoolwork, or friend drama, or dealing with a teacher they don’t like, we often offer suggestions to help them get through those situations more easily. But what should we do when our children give short or snarky responses to our genuine attempts to help? In this episode, you’ll learn: Why kids are so resistant to our suggestions, even if they know they’re good ones What we almost always do that makes the situation worse How to respond to this type of attitude so that you maintain your positive, powerful influence (and...
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Episode 344: An Unfortunate Side Effect Of Having “Big Feelings” (That You Can Fix for Your Child)
Your Parenting Long Game
People who have big feelings have many strengths. They understand other people really well and often have very strong, meaningful relationships. But there are also potential downsides to having big emotions, like having a hard time making decisions, feeling different from friends and family members, and feeling bad about themselves. Fortunately, there is something that we can do as parents to help our kids with these struggles, while strengthening their resilience and self-esteem. In this episode, you’ll learn: What it was like for me growing up as a highly sensitive person in...
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Episode 343: When a Child Has a Big Reaction to a Limit You Set
Your Parenting Long Game
We know setting limits for our children is an important part of parenting. But kids with big emotions often have over-the-top reactions that seem disproportionate to the situation. How can we handle their reactions effectively when we are exhausted by their rudeness, disrespect, and negotiations? In this episode, you’ll learn: Why children have big reactions to reasonable limits What we’re doing as parents that often makes it worse How we can help our kids handle discomfort when things don’t go their way (without losing our influence!) --
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Episode 342: Why You Must Be IMPERFECT to Raise Great Kids
Your Parenting Long Game
It's natural to want to do a “good job” as a parent. We want to be attentive, be calm when our kids are having a difficult time, teach them all the skills they need to know in life…and it's easy to be really hard on ourselves when we don't do all of those things well. The good news is, our kids don’t need parents who never make mistakes -- they actually need us to be imperfect! In this episode, you’ll learn: Why it’s hard for us to accept that our imperfections make us better parents Four reasons we MUST be imperfect to raise great kids What we should spend our...
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Episode 341: I’m Feeling Overwhelmed and Stuck… Now What?
Your Parenting Long Game
If you are raising a child or children with big emotions, you probably deal with a lot of drama throughout the day: anxiety, resistance, disrespect…maybe even your child speaking negatively about themselves. The good news? There are a lot of strategies that can help. The bad news? There are a lot of strategies that can help. And often because there are a lot of these strategies that can help, you may feel so exhausted and run down that you don’t know which strategies to try first or what your next step should be. This episode includes: What keeps us feeling stuck and unable...
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Episode 340: Energy Mismatches: Why Kids Have Big Reactions to Small Things
Your Parenting Long Game
If you are raising children with big emotions, you are probably used to their big reactions when they are tired, hungry, or overstimulated. But sometimes children have big reactions even when there is no obvious reason, leaving us feeling confused and like we have to walk on eggshells around them. In this episode, you’ll learn: What is going on when our kids act overly irritated or annoyed but it isn’t clear why How to recognize what I call “energy mismatches” (with examples) What we can do to help our kids have fewer big reactions -- and more confidence...
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Episode 339: Two Simple Words That Will Help You Become a Powerful Positive Influence
Your Parenting Long Game
We know how important it is to be a powerful positive influence with our children. But becoming one sounds daunting at times -- especially with everything else we have to juggle on a daily basis. The good news is, we can increase our influence easily, just by adding two little words to our vocabulary! In this episode, you’ll learn: What a “powerful positive influence” is, and what happens when you are one Two qualities every powerful positive influence has Two “magic” words that show our kids we care, we are consistent, and we can handle their big emotions ...
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Episode 338: Struggling with Transitions? Why What You’ve Tried Isn’t Working
Your Parenting Long Game
Children with big emotions often struggle with transitions: Getting out of the house in the morning, stopping what they’re doing to go to the dinner table or to get ready for bed. They may even resist leaving the house when they have something fun to do, like a birthday party! When nothing seems to motivate them, we can feel confused and frustrated. Fortunately, there is something that we can do to help our children with transitions, and it’s easier than you might think. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why transitions are difficult for our children (it’s not just that they...
info_outlineOften when we ask our kids with big emotions to do things they have to do, instead of doing what we ask, they resist, negotiate, or even become disrespectful to us (or themselves!). And when we feel helpless and stuck, we often then fall back on strategies that our parents used with us… which tends to make things worse. So how can we motivate responsible and respectful behavior when our attempts seem to just lead to more drama?
In this episode, you’ll learn:
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Two reasons why rewards and punishments don’t work for kids with big emotions
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Common reasons why children struggle (and how we can identify these reasons when our kids are having a hard time)
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How to go beneath kids’ behavior to motivate more positive behaviors, moods, and attitudes with less resistance