Downers

A podcast about sadness (and sometimes Korean food)

Kate's Big Quarantine! 09/08/2021

Kate's Big Quarantine! #229 – Our third to the last episode! In this installment of Downers, we answer listeners' emails and hear about Kate's big vacation! Kate's in quarantine, in Hong Kong, and has much to report about it. Also, along the way, we learn all about Jack's sofa grandfather (#sofagrandfather). Finally a look back: Jack's Composting Bin. For people who are just listening to Downers for the first time, Downers is a podcast about sadness and sometimes Korean food! (Editor's note: sorry this came out so late. OATS was sunsetting.) Plugs this week: (Hao) (Jack) (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/20478413

Packing Up and Moving Out 08/08/2021

Packing Up and Moving Out #228 – As Kate and Hao pack up parts of, or all of, their lives in preparation for the next month of their lives, we check in with them to see how they pack and what they pack. Along the way, they hit on big-issue topics like wet clothes and ransom. As a brief aside, many of you who read the episode descriptions over these past four years may think that they are written by one of the hosts; but, in fact, they are written by me, Loam Quigley. I haven't always written podcast episode descriptions—no, I started my life as a street food vendor, selling seasoned slices of agave on the streets of Hyderabad. When dial-up internet became commonplace, I joined an internet forum of likeminded people, who were interested in writing pithy, concise descriptions of audio files. We didn't know it yet, but we were all honing our skills for the rise of podcasting, which would eventually take over our lives and rend our friendships apart. With Downers coming to an end, I'm not sure where the winds will take me next. The Summer Olympics is ending in Tokyo this week. Most athletes will go home, but some, a select few, will fall in love with the city and stay behind to forge new lives and loves. That community of expats will need well-traveled guides to aid them: someone to clean the house, someone to make spiced agave nectar. Someone to describe their podcast episodes. In the meantime, I bid you farewell, dear reader. I have trained a blockchain-based artificial intelligence agent on all 228 of my episode descriptions, and it will be taking over my duties. I hope we will meet again on some other RSS feed some other day. It's been a pleasure to serve you. My name is Loam Quigley, and I love Wednesdays and midnights. Plugs this week: Ransomware (Hao) Aloha Collections' splash-proof travel bags (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/20070224

UFOs are Real, and It is What It is 07/14/2021

UFOs are Real, and It is What It is #227 – With the U.S. government wholeheartedly endorsing the concept of unidentified flying objects, we thought it would be GREAT (content-wise) to, once again, turn our attention to these mysterious objects in the sky. Are they visitors from a distant civilization, and why haven't we tried shooting a missile at them? Then, in the second half, we talk about thought-terminating clichés (Lies of the devil, Now is not the time) and how they might lead to sudden divorce. Also, at the end, a Special Announcement about the future of Downers. Plugs this week: Spider window (Hao) Journey to the Microcosmos (Jack) F1 racecar driving (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/19838906

The Sequel to Candyland is Candycountry 07/07/2021

The Sequel to Candyland is Candycountry #226 – Candy: we've all had it, but what if there were more of it? In this episode, Downers invents new types of candies. Also: voting. We've all done it, but if there were more of it (more types of voting systems)? In this episode, Downers invents new types of voting systems. Also: Kate buys a delivery of kombucha! Plugs this week: Ancient ruins (Hao) A Collection of Unmitigated Pedantry (Jack) Taboocha 大杯茶 (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/19805264

Downers Answers Yahoo! Answers Questions 06/30/2021

Downers Answers Yahoo! Answers Questions #225 (REUPLOAD) – How is babby formed? Do we live in a giant, sophisticated simulation? How can you tell if someone likes you just as much you like them? Back in the heyday of the internet, there was only one place you could go to get answers like these — Yahoo! Answers. On this episode, we hop into the wayback machine and sincerely answer these questions, long after they've been 404'd from the internet. Also: The Sims! Holes! Plugs this week: Asking for help (Hao) Cast-iron pans, seasoned (Jack) Clothes from GIRLFRIEND COLLECTIVE (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/19753550

Our Thoughts on "New" Pokémon Snap: Iglin is the New Igloo 06/23/2021

Our Thoughts on "New" Pokémon Snap: Iglin is the New Igloo #224 – Local NYC politics AND a sensual take on New Pokémon Snap take focus on this week's episode of Downers. Why is Professor Mirror so thirsty for our photos? Call us at 3252-2109-66 and leave a voicemail. Plugs this week: Hugs (Hao) ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD (Jack) Walk shorts (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/19588907

Aphantasia! 06/16/2021

Aphantasia! #223 – The Downers crew reunite for a classic three-host episode. Can't picture a green apple in your head? Having trouble counting sheep? Is your spank bank more of a septic tank? Well, you might have APHANTASIA, the topic of this week's episode. Aphantasia is the inability to voluntarily create mental images in one's mind, and it's not to be confused with Mort Garson's seminal album PLANTASIA. Also, we talk about abolishing table service, and #downerslive. Plugs this week: Robe first robe (Kate) Albert Einstein (Hao) New Pokémon Snap (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/19480628

Parameters II 06/09/2021

Parameters II #222 – Way back in the episode #000000000001, Hao and Jack (with Kate relegated to a feature segment) delved into PARAMETERS, as we figured out what the podcast should be back when we had no idea what the show would be like—as opposed to now, when we have a really strong conception of what the show should be like. It's really important to know the parameters of something when you start doing something. This time around, Hao and Jack (with Kate relegated to her cool, busy life) ask: What's the podcast like now? And are we going bald? Plugs this week: Mugs (Hao) REPLY 1988 (Jack) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/19462670

Squashing Beefs II: Confrontations: Volume I: Dawn Club 06/02/2021

Squashing Beefs II: Confrontations: Volume I: Dawn Club #221 – Confrontation is both an art and a science. On this podcast, it's also an idea for an episode. In this episode, Hao, Kate, and Ian confront each other about past segments and other general grievances. It's important to confront all sorts of people: coworkers, lovers, friends, and minor household objects. Plugs this week: Perfect quiet (Hao) Screen Time (Ian) Cinnamon scones (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/19327682

Let's Play Slay the Spire! 05/26/2021

Let's Play Slay the Spire! #220 – As a followup to the massively successful Sims episode, Kate and Hao decide to SLAY THE SPIRE. We journey deep into the spire in an attempt to kill The Heart on ascension 20. Also: Downers' new social media outgrowths; quinoa; and mean-heartedness on Twitch. Plugs this week: Nalgene bottles (Kate) Sandwiches from Mekelburg's (Hao) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/19292537

"Politician's Zoom Background Can't Hide Fact That He's Actually Driving" 05/19/2021

"Politician's Zoom Background Can't Hide Fact That He's Actually Driving" #219 – This week, we talk about Matt Novak's seminal article "Politician's Zoom Background Can't Hide Fact That He's Actually Driving." What would you do if you had to videoconference while driving? We find out by consulting our expensive, and extremely accurate, reality simulator. Also: MAIL CORNER! TENTS! Plugs this week: Nurses (Hao) Therm-a-rest camp gear (Jack) Printfresh pajamas (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/19173602

Being Alive 05/12/2021

Being Alive #218 – Lots of Mail this week, in Mail Corner! We answer a question about sexual/lucid dreams, and we talk to a foreign correspondent from around the world! Then, we round the end of the show with two harrowing tales of taking AP tests with medical maladies. Look, not every episode is going to have a cohesive theme. Plugs this week: 430 (Hao) Uno, one of Michelle's favorite games (Jack) Toast (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/19057295

How to Go Off the Grid 05/05/2021

How to Go Off the Grid #217 – Have you gone off the grid? Let us know on our social media accounts! Because this week's episode is all about how to go off the grid, and why you might want to, and why you might want to return. It's hard to live off the grid, but it might not be impossible. We learn that two of our three hosts have shot a gun. Also, we should be recusing ourselves more often; mangroves; spaceships' cockpits; people who immediately register as being well-adjusted. Plugs this week: Uyghur Human Rights Project (Hao) Netflix's very own THE INLANDER (Jack) Tony's Chocolonely (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on and • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18983117

Separating the Art from the Artist 04/28/2021

Separating the Art from the Artist #216 – Special guest host Ian, formerly contentman, joins Kate and Hao this week to talk about a topic we brought up on a previous episode and completely forgot: separating the art from the artist. As new allegations emerge for artists in almost every type of media, we often have to find a way to recontextualize our fandom in light of awful behavior. Sometimes it's a visceral disgust that just can't be overcome, and other times it's weirder because you've been hearing stories about that person since 2013, when you were doing improv comedy until 2 AM on a weeknight. Also: What's it like in Scandinavia? And: Ian's disastrous movie night. Plugs this week: Raffi Khatchadourian's "Surviving the Crackdown in Xinjiang" (Hao) Diplomático (Ian) Weird old mole (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on instagram and twitter • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18772082

Dream Guests 04/21/2021

Dream Guests #215 – This week's main segment comes from Contentman Ian, who asks: Who are your dream guests? And what would it be like if they came onto the show? We go around the horn and come up with our dream guests, both inspirational and not; finally, in the third act of the show, we interview one of them: The Wind Itself. Plugs this week: Sandwiches (Hao) Masanobu Fukoka's THE ONE-STRAW REVOLUTION (Jack) Lingonberry jam (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18771965

Smörgåsbord! 04/14/2021

Smörgåsbord! #214 – Sometimes Downers is one big main entrée, and sometimes it's not. And when it's not, it's a veritable buffet of snacks, which is this week's episode. In this installment: What Things are Two Things, Kate's Hot Steaks Took You, Forays into Social Media: Instagram Edition, and Downers Coins a New Phrase ("Faux Arguing"). Also, a missile comes toward Jack's face. Plugs this week: Armrests (Hao) Valheim, for Ian (Jack) Five Guys (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18755858

How to Leave 04/07/2021

How to Leave #213 – It's easy to arrive at something, and it's much harder to leave. This hour, we present a guide to leaving: how to leave a room at a party, how to leave a relationship, how to leave the world behind in the aftermath of a nuclear bombing, and how to leave this sentence. Cut out this audio and place it into your wallet; you never know when you'll need it. Also, the Qingming Festival and sunscreen! Plugs this week: The HEAVING BOSOMS podcast (Kate) Turkeys (Hao) EPIC GARDENING's YouTube channel (Jack) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18686573

Mario Cuomo: a Celebration 03/31/2021

Mario Cuomo: a Celebration #212 – Well, Kate's out this week, and that means Jack and Hao revert to their base instincts: insidery programming jokes, abstract roleplay, and a willingness to talk about the controversial hot topics of the day. In this edition of YOU MOLD IT, YOU SOLD IT, we investigate Mario Cuomo's long career as a New York politician and how his decisions continue to reverberate today. All that, plus nothing else, on Downers! Plugs this week: Caves (Hao) Bill Wurtz's I'M A PRINCESS (Jack) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • https://hrf.org /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18575543

Young Teenage Japanese Motorcyclist Actually Distinguished Older Man // Ann Pratchett's HOW TO PRACTICE 03/24/2021

Young Teenage Japanese Motorcyclist Actually Distinguished Older Man // Ann Pratchett's HOW TO PRACTICE #211 – Some things are actually two things, and this episode's main segment is actually two main segment. FIRST we talk about how a popular, young, teenage, blonde motorcyclist on social media turned out to be an older man using a face-swapping photo app. THEN we talk about Ann Pratchett's essay in the New Yorker, HOW TO PRACTICE, which talks about giving away your possessions so that your loved ones don't have to sift through the belongings after you pass away. It's a classic action-packed Downers episode! Plugs this week: 100 GECKS (Jack) Pickling (Hao) Grilled flatbread (Kate) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18466589

Parents of teenage daughters more likely to divorce: WHY? HOW? LET'S EXPLORE 03/17/2021

Parents of teenage daughters more likely to divorce: WHY? HOW? LET'S EXPLORE #210 – This week we cover Jan Kabátek and David C. Ribar's study "TEENAGE DAUGHTERS AS A CAUSE OF DIVORCE," in which they showed that daughters ages 13-18 are associated with a higher risk of divorce in 1995-2015 Dutch marriage registry data. We get some of the details wrong, but that's because we were going off a four-paragraph Economist article. The Economist can be very terse (boring) when it wants to be (all the time). Plus: grandma wigs, shampoo as body wash. Plugs this week: Digital frames (Kate) Love as a commodity (Kate) Irish Spring soap, in bar form (Hao) Waiting for seedlings to sprout (Jack) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • https://hrf.org /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18386660

Inbox Six or Seven 03/10/2021

Inbox Six or Seven #209 – Inbox can be a drag, and people have all sorts of ways to work around it. In this episode, we devote the hour to INBOX MANAGEMENT, and the myriad of ways it can go right or wrong. We also talk about our first email addresses, and what makes for a really, really good email. In particular, we address whether Inbox Zero – which many people say is the veganism of email – is an effective strategy for managing the deluge of electronic missives. Plugs this week: TheHaboo's Stardew Valley strims (Kate) DeleteMe (Hao) Tooshi's consecutive stream streak (Kate) Staple gun (Jack) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • https://hrf.org /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18321215

Ian III: Coffee, Wikipedia, Dogs, and Wood 03/03/2021

Ian III: Coffee, Wikipedia, Dogs, and Wood #208 – Back by popular demand, Ian and his stentorian voice occupy this action-packed episode of Downers. We're talking 10.0 life changes, we're talking unemployment, and we're talking gardens. Come for the sciatica, stay for the guide to being friends with your friends' parents. Hint: it's about not giving fruits to them. There's no unifying theme to this episode, and we're all hoping you're not going to read to this sentence. Plugs this week: Netflix's UMBRELLA ACADEMY (Kate) Flannery O'Connor's THE BARBER (Hao) Bench (Jack) Dog ownership (Ian) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • https://hrf.org /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18222302

Downers Furikake 02/24/2021

Downers Furikake #207 – Furikake is the dry Japanese condiment that everybody is shaking on their rice. Here on Downers, we took one look at this grocery-store "ethnic aisle" staple, and we saw an opportunity to make some serious dinero. We devote the hour to pitching to you, dear listener, our own DOWNERS FURIKAKE. Plugs this week: MYSTIC POP-UP BAR (Jack) Netflix's RADIUM GIRLS (Kate) Umami, like those people who come up to you at dinner parties and talk to you about umami (Hao) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • https://hrf.org /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18119120

Our Whole House is a Sink 02/17/2021

Our Whole House is a Sink #206 – Quarantine houses, but different: in this episode, we construct the ultimate DOWNERS HOUSE. Listen in as we wander from room to room, customizing it to our exacting standards. Wood stoves? Greenhouse kitchen? All things are possible here. Also: popcorn, induction stoves, and futuristic erogenous zones. Plugs this week: YouTube's TECHNOLOGY CONNECTIONS (Jack) Whirley-Pop Aluminum Stovetop Popcorn (Kate) The metric system, I guess (Hao) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • https://hrf.org /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18020066

ANDREWS v. NEW JERSEY 02/10/2021

ANDREWS v. NEW JERSEY #205 – Can an officer of the law compel you to hand over the password to your encrypted device? Or is this an example of self-incrimination, as prohibited by the Fifth Amendment? This is the case that the Supreme Court might decide later this year, and the case Downers devotes the main segment to! Along the way: salty float tanks, and hands in our purses. Plugs this week: Netflix's BLOWN AWAY (Kate) Thin mints (Jack) Argentinian man from work (Hao) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • https://hrf.org /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/18020036

紅包 02/03/2021

紅包 #204 – As the Lunar New Year approaches, we take the time to investigate one of the complex, time-honored traditions that marks the holiday: RED ENVELOPES. Usually given by an elder, the amount of money in the red envelope can be a tricky nightmare for people out there who do not subscribe to gift-giving as a love language (Jack-olytes, we call them). THEN, we give each other red envelopes on the air. Plugs this week: Mr. Rogers documentary feat. Tom Hanks (Kate) Kate's mom (it's almost her birthday) (Hao) Vaccines (Jack) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • https://hrf.org /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/17859143

Sharon Says So 01/27/2021

Sharon Says So #203 – Sharon McMahon runs an Instagram account @sharonsaysso where liberals and conservatives alike feel welcome to ask questions about how American governance works. How does someone build a neutral space for political discourse In These Trying Times, and how can we listen harder to the people whose voices have been shouted over by a louder, more vocal minority? That's just the sort of question a one-hour podcast can answer, and that's the topic of this week's Downers. Also: the debut of our brand new segment, Wake Kate Up. Plugs this week: Schell Games' UNTIL YOU FALL (Jack) Omsom's Asian flavor starters (Kate) Leaves (Hao) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • https://hrf.org /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/17667005

Our Sims Live in a Very, Very, Very Fine House 01/20/2021

Our Sims Live in a Very, Very, Very Fine House #202 – Most people play video games "vanilla," without any modifications of any sort. But, here on Downers, we say: not us, we refuse, for we mod and we must mod. On this episode, Hao, Jack, and Kate talk about the mods they've installed on the games they've played. Only on Downers will you hear the latest news about DLL files, or the two Indian women who were arguing about how shifts should be scheduled at the grocery store. Also, kimchi! Plugs this week: Mystic Popup Bar (Jack) Oat milk (Kate) The jams aisle at the Brooklyn Fare (Hao) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • https://hrf.org /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/17666921

The Twenty-year Rule 01/13/2021

The Twenty-year Rule #201 – It is now allowed to talk about the events of 9/11 on the /r/AskHistorians subreddit, which imposes a strict ban on discussion of topics fewer than twenty years old. We here on Downers, being nothing more than old curmudgeons, love the rule. Note: in this episode, we talk, briefly, glancingly, about 9/11, but not in the obnoxious way people sometimes do when they reminisce about 9/11; we also discuss questions we would ask of /r/AskHistorians, and now more of our lives could be like /r/AskHistorians. Remember: Reddit's slogan is A Man's Intuition.™ Plugs this week: STAR TREK: DISCOVERY (Jack), only on CBS ALL ACCESS Feral Hosting (Hao) Pears (Kate) Baking pears (Jack) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • https://hrf.org /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/17664518

Our 200th Episode 01/06/2021

Our 200th Episode #200 – What can you say? Sometimes, you do a podcast and it hits two hundred episodes. It's not meant to be something special, but it is anyway. The production of a podcast is a beast that must feed once a week. It is nothing special to feed it. It is the work. The work is the reward, and the reward is the work. Kate's got some questions for Jack and Hao! An inventory is made of the previous year, detailing the times of vulnerability and prosperity. All that, and more, on Downers. Plugs this week: Three-pronged plugs (Jack) Everlane sweater, loose square knit (Kate) Return (Hao) • /r/downersradio • @downersradio on the twittersphere • /episode/index/show/downersradio/id/17513276

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