Loving and Living the Quran
Let’s remind ourselves of the principles of healthy discussion and debate from the Quran which we have been exploring over the last few days Use wisdom and good admonition and dispute with them in a manner that is best [Quran16:125]. Establish common ground Establish common ground 29:46 Use logic and appeal to reason [Quran 36:77-79] Do not offend [Quran 6:109] Present a balanced perspective [Quran 2:219]. Respond with goodness rather than react to evil [Quran 41:34].
info_outline Appeal to reason and ask [rhetorical] questions [36:77-79]Loving and Living the Quran
One of the methods frequently used by the Quran to convince the reader of its arguments is the use of logic and rhetorical questioning. Researchers into Quranic linguists assert that such rhetorical questions are used in more than a thousand verses of the Quran and each use is an invitation for the reader to shift their thinking paradigm. Let us remind ourselves that a rhetorical question is one that is asked without expecting or needing an answer but for the sake of emphasis or effect. Linguists say that a rhetorical question is “a forceful statement which has the form of a question...
info_outline Respond rather than react[41:34]Loving and Living the Quran
We have explored this verse from Sura Fussilat from many different aspects. Today’s exploration will be in line with our theme of using verses from the Quran to guide us when we find ourselves in the midst of an argument. Despite our best intentions, things can get heated when we are in the midst of a conflict. It is hard to hear things that go against our belief system. It is so easy to take things personally. Others can say things in a way that triggers us and potentially make us lose our emotional balance. This verse from Sura Fussilat advices us to not react when others fall...
info_outline Do not offend your opponent [6:108]Loving and Living the Quran
Do not revile those whom they call upon besides Allah, lest they should revile God out of enmity, ignorance. [Quran 6:108] This verse from Sura Anam cautions believers not to turn to offence and aggression in the midst of an argument, especially on matters of faith. It also provides a solid reason why it is not a good idea to do so: because such behaviour will most likely lead to a retaliation of like for like. When we are in the midst of an argument, it can be easy to become triggered and angry. If we sense we are losing an argument, we can become aggressive, attacking that which is most...
info_outline Present a balanced perspective [2:219]Loving and Living the Quran
When we are in the midst of a conflict or a dispute, we tend to focus only on our side of the argument, ignoring or rejecting what merit or truth may be found on the other side. And when we do this, the other side gets more focused on proving us wrong and highlighting their arguments. Discussions and arguments like these seldom if ever, result in a deeper understanding. And they almost never result in any one side giving in to the other. The Quran teaches us another way: they ask you about wine and gambling. Say,“There is a great sin in...
info_outline Establish common ground 29:46Loving and Living the Quran
Continuing with our series on inspiration from the Holy Quran for engaging in discussion and dispute, the verse today is from Sura Ankabut where Allah (swt) says: And dispute not with the People of the Book, save in the most virtuous manner, unless it be those of them who have done wrong. And say, “We believe in that which was sent down unto us and was sent down unto you; our God and your God are one, and unto Him are we submitters.” [Holy Quran 29:46] This verse is an injunction to the Prophet and Muslims to not argue with Jews and Christians, except in a beautiful...
info_outline How to debate and dispute 16:125Loving and Living the Quran
Today we start a series on verses from the Quran that guide us how to discuss, debate and disagree with people. In the following verse from Sura Nahl, Allah says: Call unto the way of your Lord with wisdom and goodly exhortation. And dispute with them in them in a manner that is best [16:125] 4 commands are given to the Holy Prophet [as] in this verse. “(O’ Prophet!) call (mankind)…” “…to the path of your Lord…” “…with wisdom and good admonition…” “…and dispute with them in a manner that is best…” ...
info_outline Turning to the Quran for Guidance and Inspiration to Manage ourselves and take effective action in challenging times Part 2 – Channelling anger effectively and towards the right people and entitiesLoving and Living the Quran
Many of us are feeling angry at the injustices, the oppression, the mass murders, the brainwashing, political posturing, refusal of people to stand up and speak the truth, Islamophobia . … .there really is plenty to make and keep us mad. Our anger is pointing to the fact that we find ourselves in a situation which is unacceptable according to any standard of morality or humanity and it is completely justified. The issue is how are we channelling our anger? Are we using it in effective ways and towards the right people and institutions? In part 2 of the series, let’s explore these questions...
info_outline Turning to the Quran for Guidance and Inspiration to Manage ourselves and take effective action in challenging times Part 1Loving and Living the Quran
All of us are struggling with collective grief and vicarious trauma during these most distressing of times. While we want to help, we often feel hopeless and helpless. In these episode, we will turn to the Quran for guidance on how to manage ourselves and our strong emotions and take effective action to support our brothers and sisters in Palestine. #muslimtherapist #livingandlovingthequran
info_outline Asking for forgiveness from God and other people [49:11]Loving and Living the Quran
In this episode, we discuss the topic of asking for forgiveness. We start by talking about how to ask forgiveness from God and turn to the topic of apologizing to people and what ineffective and effective apologies look like. Please let me know what helped and was useful and do take a moment to subscribe on itunes and rate and review the show as it helps reaching a wider audience.
info_outlineThree keys to living a life of Ihsan (cont.)
Key 3: Pardon and forgive- Understanding God’s forgiveness
- Ghaffar- He who forgives the quantity of sins.
- Ghafoor- He who forgives the quality of sins.
- Al-'Afuw- He who removes the ill effects of sins.
These are the same qualities that one must apply in their relationships with others.
Types of forgiveness:
- Situational forgiveness- when one moves on from a situation that causes them turmoil.
- Dispositional forgiveness- pardon, forgive and overlook others for their shortcomings.
Motivation for change- inspiration from the Quran and Hadith:
- Continuously remind oneself that forgiving others gives access to His mercy.
- To attain God’s forgiveness one must forgive his fellow human beings.
- Assume that everyone has at least as good intentions as oneself.
- Psychologists and ulema both explain that forgiveness is an inner freedom.
- God transforms bad deeds into good deeds- forgive and promote if someone admits a mistake.
- A momin is obsessed with his own shortcomings, not with those of others.
Difference between anger and resentment:
- Anger: is a quick emotion. It is a fire that goes out quite quickly.
- Resentment: a persistent feeling of upset towards a situation. It’s similar to hot burning coals that continue to smoulder long after.
What we hold on to costs us emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
Barriers to forgiveness:
- Not recognizing the cost to one’s well-being.
- Fear of condoning hurtful behaviour.
- Belief that “they should pay for it.”
- Lack of skills in coping with anger.
What is forgiveness?
- Forgiveness does not mean condoning another’s behaviour.
- It’s a change in feelings and attitudes regarding what happened.
- Letting go of negative emotions such as taking revenge.
- There is no desire to make the other person suffer anymore.
- There is an increased ability to wish the other person well.
- Results in spiritual expansion and closer proximity to God.
LINKS:
SURAH YUNUS VERSE 65
SURAH AN-NUR VERSE 22
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