146 - Jessica Fern - Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy
Conversations With a Wounded Healer
Release Date: 01/20/2021
272 - Alex Jones - A Digital Storyteller Connects With Strangers to Find the Soul of Humanity
Conversations With a Wounded Healer
Disclaimer: No! Anne’s conversation isn’t with that Alex Jones. Instead, it’s with Alex Jones, the creator of Humans of Brighton And Hove, an Instagram account featuring candid street photos and stories of folks in the UK’s eclectic, beloved seaside village. While Alex’s photography is stunning, the captions create a broader community of compassion. They’re real, raw glimpses into the subject’s world. And they reveal how kindred humans are despite the manufactured divisions of race, religion, or economic status. GUEST BIO Alex Jones is a storyteller, interviewer, and...
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271 - Tiffany Konyen - Student Loan Debt is a Social Justice Issue!
Conversations With a Wounded Healer
If you’re one of the 43 million Americans currently living under the crushing weight of student loan debt, that’s by design, not personal failure. Under our late-stage capitalist system, the cost of a college degree has far outpaced the wages offered to pay for it. Tiffany Konyen, a Doctoral Candidate in the Anthropology and Social Change department at the California Institute of Integral Studies in San Francisco, wants to change how America thinks about financing education for its citizens. Their research offers insight into the impacts of student loan debt on material life...
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270 - Carolynn Bain - How a Black Independent Bookseller Celebrates Cultural Representation and Self-Care
Conversations With a Wounded Healer
Independent bookshops are magical places. But building that mix of quiet corners and convivial community doesn’t come without a lot of sweat equity. Indie bookshops thrive because of the booksellers behind them, real live humans who concentrate on more than just commerce. Carolynn Bain, founder, and owner of Afrori Books in Brighton, UK, is “that” indie bookseller, an award-winning entrepreneur whose meticulously curated titles and culturally focused events define what it means to be an indispensable neighborhood resource. Since opening in October 2021, Afrori Books has become...
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269 - Mark Fischler - Stepping Out of the Collective Trance of Society
Conversations With a Wounded Healer
With the amount of time folks invest in their news feeds, social scrolls, podcasts, and hot-takes, you’d think we’d have a better grasp on “the whole picture.” But we only operate with a partial perspective regardless of the situation or issue. This universal truth pushes many of us toward the false comfort of binary thinking. Podcast host and Professor of Criminal Justice at Plymouth State University Dr. Mark Fischler says we don’t have to pick sides. He believes that if we can get comfortable holding multiple truths at once, even if we don’t understand them, we can solve...
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268 - Khaled ElSherbini - How a Scientist Interprets Ancient Wisdom Traditions for a Modern Audience
Conversations With a Wounded Healer
If you like your woo-woo grounded in modern scientific understanding, this convo is for you! Khaled ElSherbini, PhD, is the founder of Consciousness Academy (CA), the leading IEA-accredited Enneagram school located on the Sinai Peninsula, which is, coincidentally, a place that three of the world’s major religions (Islam, Judaism, and Christianity) believe holds spiritual significance. CA quickly became a destination for seeking a deeper understanding of and connection to oneself. Students appreciate Khaled’s thoroughly modern scientific background and his ability to translate...
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267 - The Burnt Out Practice Owner: How Do We Make Wonderful, Healthy Spaces for Practice Owners AND Their Staff?
Conversations With a Wounded Healer
After 18 episodes featuring conversations with burnt-out (and not burnt-out) practice owners and some of their employees, I’ve got survey responses that prove we can band together to form the practices we desperately want to participate in. But, owners, we gotta have a chat… Employees feel underpaid, undervalued, and undersupported, while a lot of practice owners feel underappreciated and overwhelmed. The data also emphasized chasms in our understanding of daily practice life––caseloads and onboarding, supervision and power differentials, profit distribution, and benefits packages. I...
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266 - Charlotte Sills - Love, Power, and Authenticity in the Therapeutic Relationship
Conversations With a Wounded Healer
There’s a universal truth that goes something like this: To get where we’re going, it’s a good idea to examine where we’ve been. I’ll add that it’s also in our best interest to chat up the elders. Charlotte Sills, MA, MSc, is a psychotherapist in private practice in the UK and also an elder with intelligence and foresight to spare, literal textbooks worth of knowledge, as her conversation with co-host Anne Remy demonstrates. Charlotte and Anne occupy opposite ends of the age spectrum. Still, they’re committed to learning from each other and working together to realize dreams for...
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265 - The Burnt Out Practice Owner: What Do You Do When Practice Ownership Feels Out of Alignment With Your Temperament? With David Clinton
Conversations With a Wounded Healer
All good things must end, including this special series. But not before my chat with the delightfully analog David Clinton, a dear friend and former practice owner. After exiting his group practice just as the pandemic hit, David found his happy ending (or beginning) as a solo therapist with a limited online presence. His 20+ year career reminds us that we can contribute good things to this field by cultivating stubborn hope and an embodied way of being no matter which professional space we inhabit. GUEST BIO David Clinton (he/him) is a licensed counselor who has worked in private...
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264 - Reframing and Repairing Our Relationship to Power With Amanda Aguilera, The Right Use of Power Institute
Conversations With a Wounded Healer
As therapists, we’re famous for not doing our own work, so, of course, we shy away from acknowledging that we hold any power at all. Worse, we conflate power and cruelty, an assumption that keeps us mired in fear and inaction. But now that we’ve identified the issue, we can transform it. Dr. Amanda Aguilera is one of my favorite facilitators for this kind of work. She’s the executive director of The Right Use Of Power Institute (RUPI), a global non-profit that helps people utilize their power with “awareness, wisdom, compassion, and skill.” I've been training with RUPI for a...
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263 - The Burnt Out Practice Owner: How Can You Cultivate True Inclusivity and Growth? With Gabi Granoff and Evelyn Williams, Solway Psychology
Conversations With a Wounded Healer
Hey, white practice owners! The secret to building a business that embodies the principles of equity, inclusivity, and anti-racism is… Actually, I’ll let my guests do the honors. Gabi Granoff, PsyD., is the co-owner of Solway Psychology, a racially diverse practice in Chicago. Evelyn Williams, LSW, is a clinician and intake manager at the practice. They personify what’s possible when everyone takes responsibility for strengthening their side of the owner-employee relationship. GUEST BIO Gabi Granoff, PsyD., (she/her) is a licensed clinical psychologist and the co-owner of Solway...
info_outline“I think as therapists, there is no such thing as true neutrality, right?...The importance is knowing and owning your bias so that we can prevent it from doing harm.” ~Jessica Fern
Polyamory. Well, now that I have your attention…let’s get into it, shall we? Ohhh, y’all, this episode is meaty with material courtesy of the brilliant Jessica Fern, psychotherapist, coach, public speaker, relationship expert, and author. Her new book Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy* explores healthy attachments through a refreshingly non-traditional lens.
But hold up, monogamy-minded folks! You’ll want to pay close attention as insecure attachment styles can sabotage any relationship; we either feel safe and secure within them, within ourselves, or we don’t.
We can, however, foster securely functioning relationships - no matter the number of participants.
Still, too many therapists disregard the validity of monogamy, incorrectly citing it as a byproduct of childhood misattunement rather than a healthy way of being. Jessica points out that “people who are nonmonogamous are not doing nonmonogamy because they’re insecurely attached.” Instead, they’re committed to working at their relationships often with a therapist, a practice that many monogamous couples could learn from.
There’s plenty more to my conversation with Jessica including definitions! acronyms! NARM talk! Awesome links! and everyone’s favorite healer questions! Give this one a listen no matter your preferred relationship style.
Jessica Fern is a psychotherapist, public speaker and trauma and relationship expert. In her international private practice, Jessica works with individuals, couples and people in multiple-partner relationships who no longer want to be limited by their reactive patterns, cultural conditioning, insecure attachment styles and past traumas, helping them to embody new possibilities in life and love. Jessica is the author of the book Polysecure: Attachment Trauma and NonMonogmamy and you can learn more about Jessica and her work at JessicaFern.com.
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For full show notes, resources, and links to connect with our guest, visit: http://www.headhearttherapy.com/podcast
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