Early Signs of An Abuser - My Domestic Violence Story Part 3
Release Date: 10/03/2024
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Early Signs of An Abuser - My Domestic Violence Story Part 3
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Domestic violence is a pervasive and deeply traumatic issue that affects countless individuals worldwide, leaving lasting scars on survivors and their families. Abusers often employ a range of tactics to maintain control over their victims, including physical violence, emotional manipulation, financial abuse, and social isolation. The cycle of abuse can be insidious, with periods of apparent calm or remorse interspersed with escalating aggression and danger. Recognizing the early signs of an abusive relationship is crucial for potential victims to protect themselves and seek help before the...
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Early Signs of An Abuser - My Domestic Violence Story Part 2
The Resilient Heart Podcast
Domestic violence is a pervasive and often hidden issue that affects millions. Recognizing the early signs of an abuser can be crucial for protecting yourself and breaking free from a dangerous situations. Many survivors of domestic violence report overlooking or rationalizing away subtle red flags in the early stages of their relationships. By understanding and identifying these early warning signs, you can be empowered to recognize potentially abusive behaviors and seek help before situations escalate. In this episode, I share my personal story of domestic violence, exploring a series...
info_outlineDomestic violence is a pervasive and deeply traumatic issue that affects countless individuals worldwide, leaving lasting scars on survivors and their families. Abusers often employ a range of tactics to maintain control over their victims, including physical violence, emotional manipulation, financial abuse, and social isolation. The cycle of abuse can be insidious, with periods of apparent calm or remorse interspersed with escalating aggression and danger. Recognizing the early signs of an abusive relationship is crucial for potential victims to protect themselves and seek help before the situation worsens. These signs may include excessive jealousy, controlling behavior, rapid mood swings, and attempts to isolate the victim from friends and family.
In this episode, I share the final stages of my abusive relationship, including being nine months pregnant and completely isolated from my support network. The situation rapidly deteriorated, with my ex’s behavior becoming increasingly erratic and dangerous. From waking me at 3 AM to make him food to accusing me of infidelity regarding my pregnancy, his actions exemplified the manipulative and controlling nature of abusers. The night his intention was to kill me. And it marked a turning point, leading to my escape with the help of my father.
Despite the trauma and challenges I faced, including a custody battle and ongoing harassment, I want to emphasize that healing and happiness are possible for survivors of domestic violence. My journey to recovery wasn't easy or quick, but it led me to a place of peace and joy that I never thought possible during my darkest moments. Today, I live a fulfilling life, free from abuse and filled with love. To women currently in abusive situations: there is hope, and it does get better. With support, courage, and time, you can break free from the cycle of abuse and build a beautiful, safe life for yourself. Remember, you deserve love, respect, and happiness, and they are achievable, no matter how impossible it may seem right now. Tune in to learn about my journey through years of abuse, my path to healing, and how I found love and joy on the other side of this traumatic experience.
Timestamps
[00:52] Nine months pregnant and isolated from everybody
[02:24] He rudely woke me at 3 am to make him something to eat
[03:18] Accusations that the pregnancy was not his
[03:46] The night he intended to kill me
[08:15] How I was able to escape with the help of my dad
[09:50] Giving birth to my daughter
[10:50] His family manipulation started right after giving birth to my daughter
[12:48] He was of no help at all - Couldn’t change the baby’s diaper while I was at work
[13:44] He tried to kidnap my daughter
[17:30] The Court case battle to maintain full custody
[18:47] When his people followed me, and a fight ensued
[19:51] Moving me back in with my parents
[20:25] The impact of his death
[22:44] The funeral ceremony - They didn’t tell the truth about who he really was
[24:36] Nobody wanted to help us with what we needed with my daughter
[26:48] The healing process doesn’t have a timeline
[29:34] The beauty of healing from an abuser
[30:05] Be honest with your children
[31:25] My answer to peace
[32:12] Final remarks to women on domestic violence
Notable Quotes:
- “Too many women sacrifice their life in service of love believing that someone is going to be better, and the reality is that statistics tell us that isn’t the case.”
- “Abusers are really good at drawing you back in.”
- “Nobody stays when they know to their heart and to their soul that somebody abuses them in any physical capacity”
- “It sucks when you love somebody that hurts you.”
Text BEGIN to 88788 for help
Connect with me:
Gabi Garland
Website:https://tr.ee/B4j_1HuZG6
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gabi.garland/