Swallowing our Trauma Part 3
Speaking The Unspoken
This is the final episode of 'Swallowing our Trauma', where we will continue to talk about how Trauma shows up in the black community. "Blood Trauma" is a phrase I learnt from a friend and colleague, when describing the experience of the ingenious people of Canada. Born with trauma, raised in it and live with systems that continue to retraumatize us. Trauma is not a single event for the black community, it is submerged in the framework of our society and culture. We learnt to swallow the impact racism has on us as a community, and as individuals trying to survive, and move forward....
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Swallowing Our Trauma Part 2
Speaking The Unspoken
People holding, holding their tongue, but we've got this kind of confused idea that somehow swallowing means we're safe. Our reluctance as a community to not acknowledge the harmful impact of trauma has on our bodies and our minds. The evidence is in how we prioritize health and wellness, also the way we used addition to cope with swallowing our trauma. We normalized the over-sexualization of our community. We've normalized, drinking too much. We have normalized, some of those harmful things that we still do, it's been normalized. Who are we???-well, there are 5 of us ……. -Amanda...
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Black People Swallowing their Trauma
Speaking The Unspoken
There is the belief that trauma is a single event or a combination of many events, In the black community, we discuss why it's on a continuum of historical, generational and daily trauma experiences in our community. Learning to swallow our trauma in order to survive or create safety. Maybe the motivation to not disrupt/ make noise about the unjust is influenced by many factors which include the need to protect and secure our need to survive in an unjust society. Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs always comes to thought when discussing our Why. It's what motivates us to fulfill...
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Hustling for Worthiness Black Women and Self love.
Speaking The Unspoken
A raw open discussion about what drives us to hustle for our worthiness and the journey of self-love and what it actually means. Why It takes us years to be protective of ourselves and then the learning that I no longer have to give of myself, to the point of depletion to feel worthy of love and belonging. What has informed our sense of worthiness? We dive into our value, our worth and our rollercoaster journey to self-love. We begin to discuss how mainstream media is portraying Black women in a particular way. Who are we???-well, there are 5 of us ……. -Amanda Drayton,...
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Permission To Heal
Speaking The Unspoken
Therapy is for mad people, Cheryl says before she began her personal journey with therapy, when her therapist tells her to “leave her bullshit at the door”. When we talk about therapy we ask ourselves, why do black people struggle to seek it out for themselves? Is it a lack of understanding about why people seek out therapy or is it the stigma of accessing mental health services? Or is it simply that we lack the understanding of how generational trauma impacts how black people show up in the world today. There have been many great books written about how trauma...
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Our relationships with parents
Speaking The Unspoken
Healing and mental health; a frank, raw and honest discussion about being raised by parents who struggle with very little community support and lack accessible resources to help them deal with depression, anxiety, stress and past generational trauma. What they did was used the resources they had at the time. They went to Church, the hairdressers, and other places where they could talk to their black peers. As Dr. June says “the hairdresser was a place my mum was able to share with other women and be honest about how she really felt about her marriage”. Amanda and June share the...
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Church, Shame, Fear and Black people Part 1
Speaking The Unspoken
Are we performing our worthiness? " I recognize the shame and judgements." This is a raw and open conversation between 5 black women. They have journeyed together for over 25 years in learning, parenting, self-discovery and development. After listening to a chapter by Tracey Michael Lewis -Giggetts: from the book 'You Are the Best Thing by Tarana Burke and Brene Brown.' This is one heated discussion with so many different perspectives based on our life experiences and growing up with religion being the backbone of our community. We discuss some challenging subjects, and we talk...
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How does other people influences who we are
Speaking The Unspoken
My capacity to love was purely due to my mother's love and kindness; Crazy, my mother taught me what not to be! And the same time led me to dig deep and live my dream. A Discussion through reflections about the role models in our lives. The who and the why and the impact on how those that have influenced shape our lives so far; We often do not recognize who our role models were until we are much older, when we can look at the experiences from a different perspective. Sometimes that influence is positive, and sometimes it’s not, but nerveless shapes our awareness and understanding of who we...
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Does our values cause us to have conflict with ourselves
Speaking The Unspoken
Are our values part of who we are? This podcast episode is a discussion between 5 women, first, what are your values and what would be your top 5 values and if you had the opportunity to move to a new world which ones would you take? What are values; What are the things that we would want to die on a hill if they were not being honoured? Our values govern how and what we do unconsciously! ever wonder why you get mad or frustrated about a situation or a person? well, it's often because your value is not being honoured? Who are we???-well there are 5 of us ……. -Amanda Drayton,...
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The reflections of the generation of the Windrush.
Speaking The Unspoken
“Ahhhh, the birth of Lovers Rock music...........” “They called us names like Wog, Kitty Kat, chocolate-drop, Nxxxxx...............” “ and often told us to go back to our country” “Racism was relentless early 60s No Irish, No Dogs, NO Blacks. This Podcast is about 5 Black women sharing their experiences of what it is like to grow up in a time England referred to as the Windrush in the 1940s. Speaking the Unspoken is about engaging Black women in conversations that firmly put their future and family in their hands. Who are we -well, there are 5 of us: -Amanda Drayton,...
info_outlineAre we performing our worthiness? " I recognize the shame and judgements."
This is a raw and open conversation between 5 black women. They have journeyed together for over 25 years in learning, parenting, self-discovery and development.
After listening to a chapter by Tracey Michael Lewis -Giggetts: from the book 'You Are the Best Thing by Tarana Burke and Brene Brown.'
This is one heated discussion with so many different perspectives based on our life experiences and growing up with religion being the backbone of our community.
We discuss some challenging subjects, and we talk about shaming, judgement, controlling, and we remember some of the elders of teh church. No short skirts, no makeup, and often you would hear teh elders of teh church say look how much neck or arms some sister was showing; we experience it directly and or observed. Also, we discuss how sex and sexuality are introduced to us through the church before we are mature to understand the impact on our ability to experience intimacy.
Why? Maybe because the black community tends to distance themselves from talking about something they don’t quite have control of, or they feel powerless to change that narrative!
Maybe because the church has been a place for community, connection, support and hopes, we are worried we do not want to erode that notion that the church is our haven and a safe place?
I asked each of teh women if they had a billboard, and every black girl would see it! What would it say?
They shared:
“Feel the fear and do it anyway.”
“Speak up”
“Take up as much space as you want.”
“Don’t edit yourself.”
“Courage to be who you are”
To know more, check out our website;
https://www.podpage.com/speaking-the-unspoken-1/s1e4