60: Thriving in Biblical Roles of Husband and Wife

Are you operating in the biblical roles God set forth for marriage?  

In this episode, Brian and Heather Mayer interview Michael and Tania Koehler, founders of Marriage Mania Ministry.  They discuss their approach to biblical roles in marriage. They emphasize the complementarian view, highlighting specific commands for husbands (lead, protect, provide) and wives (submit, respect, support). They share personal experiences, noting challenges in their own marriage and the importance of humility, prayer, and mutual respect. They stressed that submission is loving and not demanding, and advised against nagging or demanding change in one's spouse. They also mentioned their resources, including books and online content, available at marriagemaniaministry.com.

Introduction and Background of Michael and Tania Koehler

• Brian Mayer introduces Michael and Tania Koehler, highlighting their marriage ministry and the similarities in their missions.

• Michael and Tania express their excitement about being on the program and the importance of the topic.

• Brian and Heather Mayer share their excitement about learning from Michael and Tania.

• Michael and Tania share their background, including their marriage, their daughter, and their ministry, Marriage Mania Ministry.

Overview of Marriage Mania Ministry

• Michael and Tania describe their ministry, which includes teaching classes, mentoring couples, and expanding their reach online.

• They mention their podcast, books, and other materials, including a marriage coloring book and gratitude journals.

• Tania shares about her book "The Helper: The Role of a Biblical Wife" and Michael's companion book on the role of a biblical husband.

• Michael and Tania discuss their journey in ministry and the impact of their online presence.

Biblical Roles of the Husband and Wife

• Michael explains the egalitarian and complementarian views on the roles of husbands and wives.

• He emphasizes the complementarian view, stating that men and women are different and have distinct roles from God.

• Michael outlines specific commands for husbands and wives from the Bible, including leadership and submission.

• He highlights the importance of following God's ways because they are the best way to do things.

Challenges and Misconceptions in Biblical Roles

• Tania and Michael discuss the cultural view of submission and how it differs from the biblical perspective.

• They emphasize that submission is a loving act and not a demanding right.

• Michael talks about the importance of husbands leading as Christ leads the church, sacrificially and with understanding.

• Tania shares her personal journey of learning and unlearning about submission and respect in marriage.

Personal Experiences and Learning in Marriage

• Tania shares her initial resistance to starting their marriage ministry and how she eventually came to support it.

• She discusses the importance of respect and communication in marriage and how she has grown in understanding submission.

• Michael talks about his tendency to people-please and how he has learned to lead his family with God's guidance.

• They both emphasize the importance of humility and prayer in their leadership and decision-making.

Practical Advice for Couples

• Heather Mayer shares her experiences with couples who struggle with decision-making and submission.

• Michael and Tania discuss the importance of weighing both spouses' desires and making decisions that are best for the family.

• They emphasize the need for communication and understanding in marriage.

• Tania highlights the importance of gratitude and respect in building a strong marriage.

Addressing Misunderstandings and Misconceptions

• Brian Mayer asks about the misunderstandings and misconceptions around submission.

• Michael explains that submission is not about losing oneself but about looking out for the interests of others.

• Tania emphasizes that submission is a loving act and not a demanding right.

• They discuss the importance of understanding the specific commands for husbands and wives in the Bible.

Handling Quarrelsome or Nagging Spouses

• Brian Mayer asks Michael how he handles a quarrelsome or nagging wife.

• Michael emphasizes the importance of self-reflection and prayer for both spouses.

• He suggests focusing on personal growth and allowing the Holy Spirit to work in the marriage.

• Tania shares her advice for wives who feel their husbands are not leading, emphasizing the importance of repentance and gratitude.

Final Thoughts and Resources

• Brian Mayer wraps up the conversation, expressing gratitude for the insights shared by Michael and Tania.

• Michael and Tania mention their resources, including their books and online presence, and provide contact information.

• They express their desire to continue connecting and supporting each other in their ministries.

• The conversation ends with mutual appreciation and a commitment to stay connected.

Resources Mentioned

• Marriage Mania Ministry Website

• The Helper:  The Role of the Biblical Wife Study

• The Covering:  The Role of the Biblical Husband Study

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