Over-Functioning Parent in Recovery: How to Stop Rescuing and Build a Capable Kid
Psyched2Parent: Turning Brain Science into Tiny Wins for Parents
Release Date: 12/15/2025
When Your Kid Asks About Scary News: The HEAR Script for Hard Questions
Psyched2Parent: Turning Brain Science into Tiny Wins for Parents
When Your Kid Asks About Scary News: The HEAR Script for Hard Questions Your kid overhears a scary headline, and later drops the question that hits you in the chest: “Why would someone do that… and are we safe?” In this episode, Dr. Amy Patenaude shares a simple, repeatable framework you can remember under stress: HEAR, so you’re not scrambling for the perfect words when your own brain goes blank. 3 to 5 key takeaways Your kid is usually asking a safety and regulation question, even if it sounds like a “why” question. Your nervous system sets the tone. The goal is not perfection,...
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Won’t vs Can’t: The 3 Clues That Change Everything (Especially with Strong-Willed Kids)
Psyched2Parent: Turning Brain Science into Tiny Wins for Parents
Won’t vs Can’t: The 3 Clues That Change Everything (Especially with Strong-Willed Kids) If you’re parenting a strong-willed kid, you’ve heard (or thought) some version of: “They just won’t.” But a lot of “won’t” moments are actually “can’t-in-that-format / can’t-in-this-moment”—and reading it wrong turns into pressure, consequences, and a fight that helps no one. In this episode, Dr. Amy Patenaude gives you a simple, brain-based way to stop debating intent and start spotting the real barrier so you can respond with clarity (and keep expectations without turning...
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When Reading Isn’t Clicking: The K–2 Evaluation, Dyslexia Questions, and What to Ask Before Retention Comes Up
Psyched2Parent: Turning Brain Science into Tiny Wins for Parents
When Reading Isn’t Clicking: The K–2 Evaluation, Dyslexia Questions, and What to Ask Before Retention Comes Up That “Reading Support / Next Steps” email can make your stomach drop—fast. In this episode, Dr. Amy Patenaude walks you through what a K–2 reading evaluation actually looks at (in normal human language), what “dyslexia questions” are most useful in early elementary, and what to ask for before retention becomes the whole plan. You’ll leave with clear questions, calm scripts, and a Monday-morning-ready way to keep the plan specific (not vague “more time”). In this...
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When Middle School Kids Say Scary Things: “Life Is Pointless,” “Intrusive Thoughts,” “I Want to Die” — A Calm, Clear Plan for Parents
Psyched2Parent: Turning Brain Science into Tiny Wins for Parents
When Middle School Kids Say Scary Things: “Life Is Pointless,” “Intrusive Thoughts,” “I Want to Die” — A Calm, Clear Plan for Parents Today’s episode is for parents of middle schoolers (roughly ages 11–14)—when your kid says big, scary things like “Life is pointless,” “I have intrusive thoughts about death,” or “I want to die,” and your nervous system immediately lights up. We’re building a calm plan that takes your kid seriously without catapulting you into spiraling or minimizing. Quick note: this episode is educational. If you’re worried about immediate...
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How to Get Kids Off Screens: Dopamine, Tablets, and the Battle for Balance
Psyched2Parent: Turning Brain Science into Tiny Wins for Parents
Episode 17: Screens, Dopamine, and the Battle for Balance (Elementary Edition) Episode summary If “screens off” turns your child into a tiny lawyer with raccoon-level regulation, you’re not alone. In this episode, Dr. Amy explains why tablets feel stickier than TV, what dopamine is actually doing in the brain, and how to build a predictable off-ramp so transitions don’t blow up your whole day. In this episode you’ll learn Why stopping screens is a stack of skills, not just “listening” Why tablets can be harder than TV (interactive, fast feedback, lots of control) What to expect...
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The Home–School Mismatch: Why Your Kid Falls Apart After School (and What to Do)
Psyched2Parent: Turning Brain Science into Tiny Wins for Parents
Episode 16: The Home–School Mismatch: Why Your Kid Falls Apart After School (and What to Do) Episode summary If your kid is “fine at school” and then falls apart at home, this episode will make the whole thing make sense. Dr. Amy explains why the home–school mismatch happens (no shame, no blame) and how to connect what you see at home with what school sees at school so you can stop guessing and start advocating clearly. In this episode you’ll learn Why “same kid, different math” is the key reframe when school and home look totally different How to spot the hidden supports at...
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After School Meltdowns: The Coke Bottle Kid
Psyched2Parent: Turning Brain Science into Tiny Wins for Parents
Episode 15: After School Meltdowns: The Coke Bottle Kid Episode summary If your child is “fine” at school and then absolutely falls apart at home—over homework, the wrong snack, or a sibling breathing—this episode is for you. Dr. Amy Patenaude explains after-school meltdowns with the Coke Bottle Kid metaphor: school is the shaking, home is where the cap comes off. You’ll get a simple stage map (shaken → fizzing → cap-tight → pop → recovery) plus a practical strategy to release pressure before things explode. In this episode you’ll learn Why after-school meltdowns are...
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What runDisney’s Dopey Challenge Taught Me About Raising Big-Feeling Kids (Boundaries, Pacing, and Repair)
Psyched2Parent: Turning Brain Science into Tiny Wins for Parents
Episode summary In this behind-the-curtain episode, Dr. Amy Patenaude shares what runDisney’s Dopey Challenge (four races in four days) taught her about endurance parenting—especially in the after-school hours when everyone’s bandwidth is gone. You’ll get a brain-based way to think about pacing, boundaries, Plan B moments, and repair—plus copy/paste school advocacy language and Tiny Wins you can try this week. In this episode you’ll learn How to shift from “fix it today” to an endurance question: “What makes later easier?” Why after-school meltdowns often mean “you hit a...
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AI Parenting Help Without the Rabbit Hole: Tiny Scripts for Big Feelings
Psyched2Parent: Turning Brain Science into Tiny Wins for Parents
Episode summary It’s 9:47pm, the kitchen is “less dangerous,” and then a totally normal school email sends your brain into full threat-detection mode. In this episode, Dr. Amy Patenaude breaks down how to use AI tools like ChatGPT for parenting and school support without letting them fuel anxiety spirals, rewrite loops, or panic-research. You’ll get guardrails, a simple stop sign, and tiny scripts that help you sound like your regulated self, not your 10pm self. In this episode you’ll learn Why AI can be helpful and also a surprisingly efficient anxiety amplifier when you’re...
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Brain Traffic Jams: When Executive Function Collides with Real Life
Psyched2Parent: Turning Brain Science into Tiny Wins for Parents
Episode summary Mornings, homework, transitions, and bedtime can turn into total chaos when your child’s executive function system hits overload. In this episode, I’ll help you spot an executive function “traffic jam” in real time, translate “won’t” into “can’t yet, not like this,” and use simple supports that lower conflict without lowering expectations. You’ll leave with scripts you can say out loud and Tiny Wins that act like on-ramps when real life is coming in hot at 7:42 a.m. In this episode you’ll learn What executive functioning is (and what it is not) in plain...
info_outlineOver-Functioning Parent in Recovery: How to Stop Rescuing and Build a Capable Kid
Have you ever “helped” so much that you ended up doing 80% of the work—homework, emails, projects, the whole thing? In this episode, we talk about why over-functioning is so tempting (especially with anxious, big-feeling kids) and how it can quietly chip away at kids’ confidence.
You’ll learn the simple CAR metaphor for motivation—and walk away with scripts + Tiny Wins to shift from rescuer to coach, without turning into a cold “figure it out” parent.
In this episode, you’ll learn
- Why over-functioning lowers short-term stress but can block long-term confidence and skill-building
- The CAR motivation metaphor: Control/Choice, Ability, Relationship
- Why autonomy-supportive parenting (warm + structured + choice) supports motivation better than psychological control
- How family accommodation can reduce anxiety in the moment but increase it over time
- How to change the pattern while staying emotionally supportive: “I love you, and I believe you can do small brave steps.”
Tiny Wins (pick 1–2)
- The 30-Second Empathy Pause (before anything instructional)
- Choice inside a boundary (2–3 real choices within the non-negotiable)
- Pick one low-stakes thing you will not rescue this week
- Try a systems-focused repair line: “If it goes sideways, we need a better system. We’ll figure it out together.”
Scripts you can borrow (quick wins)
- Empathy pause: “This feels hard. I’m with you.”
- Choice inside a boundary: “This is getting done. Do you want to start with the easy part or the hard part?”
- Ability scaffold: “Let’s do the first one together, then you try the next.”
- Warm + boundaried: “I won’t do it for you, and I won’t leave you alone with it. I’ll stay close while you practice.”
- Coach mindset: “You are more capable than you feel right now—and I’m right here while you try.”
- Systems repair: “If it goes sideways, we need a better system. We’ll figure it out together.”
Episode quotes
- “Think of your child’s motivation like a CAR they are trying to drive through school and life.”
- “You are more capable than you feel right now, and I am right here while you practice.”
- “Where am I climbing into the driver’s seat of my child’s CAR—and what’s one small place I can slide back into the passenger seat this week while staying close?”
Join the Tiny Wins email list + download the free Big Feelings Decoder:
If you’re parenting a big-feeling, strong-willed kid and you’re thinking, “What is happening right now?” — I made something for you. Get simple, brain-based support for parenting big feelings—plus a quick guide to help you decode what’s really going on underneath meltdowns and shutdowns. Big Feelings Decoder