The Invisible Pattern Destroying Your Relationship (And How the Enneagram Helps You Break It)

Why do you keep having the same fights in your relationships — even when you’re trying to communicate well? Most relationship problems aren’t caused by what you said in the last argument… they’re driven by an invisible pattern that’s been running the show for years. 📘

In this episode, we’ll look at the invisible patterns quietly shaping how you react in relationships — and why it can feel like you’re stuck in the same arguments on repeat. Using a real (and slightly ridiculous) argument my wife and I had over a grocery receipt and some books, I’ll walk you through: 

• Why “You’re not listening!” moments keep happening — even when you repeat back what you heard

• The difference between behaviour-level problems and what’s really going on underneath

• How fear, motivation, and wiring shape your reactions — and theirs

• How this same pattern shows up for executives, athletes, creatives, parents, and students

• How the Enneagram gives language to what’s driving you below the surface

 

Then we’ll walk through the 9 core Enneagram patterns in relationships so you can: 

• Recognize the pattern that’s been quietly running in the background

• See why certain people or situations trigger you more than others

• Respond with more clarity, compassion, and healthier boundaries — instead of reacting on autopilot

If you’ve ever thought, “Why does this keep happening?” — or felt like you’re sabotaging your own relationships without meaning to — this episode will help you understand the invisible pattern behind it, and how to begin breaking it.

This is a shame-free, judgment-free space. No sermons. Just honest tools to help you have healthier relationships with yourself and the people you care about. #relationshippatterns #emotionalhealth  #Relationships #Enneagram #SelfAwareness #CommunicationSkills #PersonalGrowth

Encouragement Minus the Sermon is a safe, honest, judgment-free space for people who want healthier relationships — with themselves and with others — without sermons, shame, or pressure. I’m Mike Hauser — iEQ9-certified Enneagram coach and recovering people-pleaser. For over two decades, I’ve helped individuals, couples, and leaders navigate identity struggles, emotional health, unhealthy patterns, and complicated relationships with empathy and zero preaching.

This channel is for thoughtful people who want something more grounded and real than surface-level advice.

Here you’ll find conversations around:

• Self — emotional clarity, identity, shame, self-awareness, and healing

• Others — boundaries, communication, conflict repair, and real connection

• Faith & meaning — thoughtful spiritual exploration for those who are open, without pressure or religious baggage

Real stories, practical insights, Enneagram wisdom, honest reflection, and the occasional laugh ical insights, Enneagram wisdom, honest reflection, and the occasional laugh — never hype or sermons.

🎯 Work With Mike (Enneagram Coaching, Relationships, Personal Growth): https://encouragementminusthesermon.com/enneagram

Disclaimer: This channel offers general encouragement and personal growth insights and is not a substitute for professional mental health or medical care.