143 - A God-Prank Christmas: The Miracle of Obstinacy!
It's Christmastown
We're astrally projecting into an aldis lamp to tell CHRISTMAS BEDTIME STORIES (), but we are absolutely not dead, we're just… TEASER: In Florida, ok? … Top 10 JACKED-UP Movies … Call the General THEME: "," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather PART ONE DEAD DAD … Please do not perceive us … Too disturbing for civvies … Cast Rundown … Escaping the NXIVM Cult … Heat, again … The Expositional Challenge … Listen to "Jeb & Maura's Awful Party" … Plot Mop-Up: Stepdad solution; Baxter (mutual) breakup … Rules-free ass-sliding nougat … Not a modeling-behavior...
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142 - Heptarchy of Hospitaliano!
It's Christmastown
It's a Boogie-Woogie Royal boy and girl named Dee Dee having A ROYAL QUEEN'S CHRISTMAS (), and how did we find it?… TEASER: I use-a da Google! THEME: "," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather PART ONE Getting the lead out for the NYC marathon … "Darren Wahlberg" … Vintage Hallmark mind prison … Long or Staten Island … Reopening the Beast … The dangers of nostalgia… PART TWO Cast Rundown …Megan Park Appreciation Station … The Expositional Challenge … We're sensualists … Plot Mop-Up: Zoe's BF's fancy hotel bakery contract; big brother snowman volunteers; good...
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141 - The Great Yiddish Bake Off
It's Christmastown
ANDY LEVY, MAURA QUINT & CHARLES STAR return for a latke contest and a little HANUKKAH ON RYE () but first... Everyone is being disrespectful to the story of Hanukkah. THEME: "," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather PART ONE Minyan introductions … Jewish menu check … Podcast Goy … Hallmark Hanukkah History … Jewishness at 11.5, for future museums … Instant Bubbe, chocolate syrup … "Hollywood" … Peter DeLuise, James Caan Rule … Pandering, mockery, Batman … Dissociation, grandparental Jewishness… PART TWO Cast Rundown ... The Expositional Challenge: You've Got...
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140 - Blind, Incoherent and Metal as Hell
It's Christmastown
HOLLY ANDERSON brings us a piping hot basket of dogs to help us in GUIDING EMILY (), but… TEASER: We're at a loss … DMT and Togo … Live barking … THEME: "," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather PART ONE Holly's forever home … Garth? … Hallmark knowledge (+200 Dodgeball) … Healthy for work: a millennial attack … Talking Dog theory … Eric McCormack, yellow lab … Surface dog, onscreen braille … Phone accessibility, unicornmoji … Timeless, America+… PART TWO Cast Rundown … Drew? … Dog interlude … The Expositional Challenge … Afraid of beeps …...
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139 - Snow Crashing the Joe Morgan Moneyball Universe
It's Christmastown
Why did we try to find LOVE IN GLACIER NATIONAL PARK ()? Because it is there. As is… TEASER: The horniest avalanche-safety film we've ever seen, trapped in the Beavis terrarium of the ancestral mind, with Steve. THEME: "," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather PART ONE Is the Angel Jason Giambi? … Avalanche safety tips … A feast of table-read first takes … Extreme Hallmark throwback … The title! … Cast Rundown … The Expositional Challenge … Plot Mop-Up: Samantha, dog trainer, mom's apprentice; Sonya, stupid sexy Flanders mode … Beavis-world vision … Not pregnant, adios!...
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138 - Josie and the Gilrbosses
It's Christmastown
We're having a launch party for the stuffed Italian bread triptychs honoring SISTERHOOD, INC. (), but first... TEASER: Don't fiddle with the knobs, or it's Queens for ya. THEME: "," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather PART ONE Happy Employment Movie! … Greeting cards, Tech Nazis, Roko's Basilisk … Jim Rome Take: A Hannibal Lecter Group Text Experience … Sacramento … No Trump phlegm, no fizz… PART TWO Cast Rundown … The Expositional Challenge … Plot Mop-Up: The, uh, entire romantic plot; board structure; 30 Billion Dowmericans; mature/good...
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137 - Chocopurse Presents: Collateral (All-22 Footage)
It's Christmastown
We’re spending all day in the car on our way to a stationary restaurant, and them’s the breaks with AN UNEXPECTED VALENTINE (), but first... TEASER: Our respect for the Boboli Corporation. THEME: "," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather PART ONE Foster Grant, CF Frost, Wells Fargo … Jim Caviezel and Scully … Bonus preview … Nick Bond Appreciation Station … “Fries” vs. “Pizza”... PART TWO We counted them down! … “Christmas” explains a lot … Can’t remember movies … Why do these people meet? … Cast Rundown … Soriano or Osuna? …...
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136 - Gergich in the Machine
It's Christmastown
It's a new era of stripping color from the world, and all anyone can ask is WHERE ARE YOU, CHRISTMAS? (), but first... Yeah, the audio thing was Dave's fault. I said it. THEME: "," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather PART ONE How I met your mother ... Doc Hollywood and Danny Wuerffel (again) ... Pleasantville, but Hallmark ... Back in the saddle ... Cast Rundown and Expositional Challenge ... Larded with Hallmark-movie metacognition ... Recognition, not comedy ... New Year's movies ... Nice vision of Christmas ... David Lynch's last film ... PART TWO Spot the...
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135 - An Open-Faced Hallmark Movie
It's Christmastown
We brought a murderer home who had an advent calendar kill schedule, and 'TWAS THE DATE BEFORE CHRISTMAS (), but first... A Christmastown message from TV's Andy Levy ... THEME: "," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather PART ONE Watching with a widow ... Implausible landlordism ... It's fine, it's a Chilis II ... Elevated basement, structurally self-aware ... The AI/Gattaca of Hallmark ... PART TWO Cast Rundown, Expositional Challenge and Plot Mop-Up: Bryan vs. traditional suits; Jessie and Christmas games ... No gazebo, no kiss ... Groening's a Karpluk ... Buckley...
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134 - Giving Millennial Pandering a Hand
It's Christmastown
DC PIERSON hitches a ride on a taco truck to THE SANTA SUMMIT (), but... Is that the blowjob guy? THEME: "," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather PART ONE Meet DC! ... Santacon: A cold version of St. Patrick's Day ... DC's Hallmark Wicker Man experience ... Southwestern pro-Christmas ... A 100-disc changer... PART TWO Cast Rundown ... The Expositional Challenge ... Plot Mop-Up: Ava's Ben crush; Liam and Mac, construction networking ... Parasocial cast relationships ... The Beesley Touch ... A movie made of extra bits... PART THREE Spot the Angel: Knowingly secular; Second Angel...
info_outlineIt's a Boogie-Woogie Royal boy and girl named Dee Dee having A ROYAL QUEEN'S CHRISTMAS (2021), and how did we find it?…
TEASER:
I use-a da Google!
THEME: "Fuck You If You Don't Like Christmas," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather
PART ONE
Getting the lead out for the NYC marathon … "Darren Wahlberg" … Vintage Hallmark mind prison … Long or Staten Island … Reopening the Beast … The dangers of nostalgia…
PART TWO
Cast Rundown …Megan Park Appreciation Station … The Expositional Challenge … We're sensualists … Plot Mop-Up: Zoe's BF's fancy hotel bakery contract; big brother snowman volunteers; good throwing form; after-school choir program; royal retirement, Exeter, Choate, Hanover, Danelaw…
PART THREE
Our new $10 Patreon livestream!/Hera Appreciation Station … Spot the Angel: Whitbey's fart-free Derek Jacobi notes … Eat Your Heart Out: Mostly good; antipasti damn sampler; OK hotel food; wtf r u saying (Italian); chicken caprese; charcuterie rosemary; Christmas colors; "I got cannoli!" … The Hallmark Expanded Universe: Episode 137's Collateral, Episode 141's Katz's knockoff, Episode 8's blood-red bordello Brooklyn…
PART FOUR
Overdetermined: You got direction in my freedom; Quit! Quit! Quit! Quit! … Foxhole Friends … Crossover: McDowell's, Hallmark cultural amnesia, Groundhog Day for Duolingo … The Hallmark Voight-Kampff Test: King and Queen, plot forms … Authentically careless aristocrats? … Return of "Coordinator" … The Ethnics, an EPCOT People…
PART FIVE
Rating: 2.5 … So rote, real piano playing, busted for bird-and-fish plagiarism … The Leftovers: Julian Morris and Mae Whitman Appreciation Station … 2017 Mark Felt miniseries … Succulent Christmas meal … Handjob Park … Rob Thomas … Running back for the Jets … Palace of Exeter, Bruno Kirby's mom … A Pocket Circus, The Mook's Gambit … Merry Christmas! • All other music by Chris Collingwood of Look Park and Fountains of Wayne, except: "Orchestral Sports Theme" by Chris Collingwood and Rick Murnane.